Lorain's pov
I can't remember when it started, when i started getting this feeling in my heart simply from looking at him, when i became enarmoned with everything that he was handsome, strong and most importantly, kind, everyone liked to talk about how i was so godsend or how i was the reincarnation of some saint but no i never held a candle to him, whenever he saw some thing wrong in world even if it wasn't his fault he agonized over it like so, his face would never betray him but eyes told a story his features never could like he himself felt pain when others did, even then he wouldn't agonize for long as soon enough his time would soon be consumed with methods to aliviate said pain i still remember 3 winters ago when he found out the children in the local orphanage didn't have enough warm clothes to last them until spring and all the shops had sold out so he ran into the forbidden forest and hunted down several species of monsters who were known to have thick warm hides and had them down for the children he even bought up every single piece in the city, i still remember it clearly how he looked every night coming in after a hard days work of tracking and fighting in the snow his face hadn't changed at all but in yhose eyes i saw pure bliss the likes of those one would find on lottery winners, like just being a good person healed him and subdued the cold feeling in his heart.
I had always known , since the day i met him i could feel it a mixture of pain and suffering so potent i feared her was simply looking for a means of escape and that was why he chose to become a mercenary, they saw in order to become a mercenary you have to put gold above your own life but that doesn't mean you shouldn't care about it at all, i saw a boy who looked like he didnt want to live anymore, who would probably throw his life away the moment the chance came and i sought to give him a reason to hang onto it, why did someone do good have to suffer so much, it didn't make sense and when ever i asked him why, why did he have such a dark cloud above him he simply replied with
"its because of my past and i can't tell you the details of said past"
"then don't"
i said
"just tell me how to help you"
and instead of replying he simply hugged me, hugged me like a brother his sister, i wanted more so much more to be more than a friend to be.....
his hug was nice it made me feel safe and secure something i could never truly feel because i couldn't use any of the arts without risking damage to my body it felt as if all was right with so much so that i cried not out of sadness but of joy but when i thought of another girl receiving this same hug only as more that what i was my tears dried up as i felt a bit of jealousy, thankfully he didn't notice or seem to care but by then i had my answer, i loved him more than i cared to admit but didn't want to show it i didn't want to make the first move as i wanted him to want to feel the same way about me as well, i knew it would take time, i knew it might never happen but i didn't want to force him to have to accept me simply because he didn't want to see me in pain but after so much time of silence and him being oblivious i decided to try something drastic, to see his reaction if i threw myself into the lion's den of love and thankfully the lion came on its own, i held out hope that he would say something do something but all i got was shock no pain, no realization just shock and confusion thankfully i had resolved myself for this as well, i had told myself that if Kalen didnt chose me i would give up on him i'm not so greedy as to try and chain someone who wouldn't find love with me and so as i stare at the sky blue dress on my bed a comfortable dress that i would allow me to run in while also boasting some moderate enchantments that would help in both conserving stamina and adding to my speed a visible frown is on my face, i thought i was prepared for this but despite how much i love this particular dress i got from Felix on my last birthday the sight of it today revolted me, i couldnt despite how much i hated him stand him up, i had promised to go out with Michael tonight and i intend to keep that promise no matter how hard i don't want to and with my fist clenched i brace my self for a night i will never forget, this night