Ch.4.3: A Change for the Worse

Harrace must have heard the retreating hoofbeats as well. He emerged from the hallway and rushed over to her. "Are you alright, miss? You should have never met with him alone!"

"Ah, Harrace, I'm alright for now." She tried to give him a smile to calm him, but knew from the deepening look of concern on Harrace's face that it had not come close. Lianna stared at the slightly ajar front door to the manor and sighed against the roar of thoughts that tangled themselves in the back of her mind. "May I borrow your arm for a moment? I think I'd like to rest in my room for a bit."

The frown did not leave Harrace's face, but he more than willingly offered her his arm. With his help, she was able to stand. He escorted her up the stairs and to her room door.

"Thank you. Check on Aaron if you would? I'll just be resting." She entered her room, leaving Harrace in the hall, looking for all the world like he wanted to question her about what happened, but all his questions went unsaid.

***

Once in her room alone, Lianna found all her thoughts rushing to the forefront of her mind. She stood frozen in the center of her bedroom, her hands clenched into fists over her chest. Her eyes stared off towards the window, but she did not truly see the window itself, so inward was her attention.

One week? One week would not be enough to convince her father to go along with her plan to seek help from Duke Rithan–let alone also travel the three days to the Rithan border gate, request a meeting with the duke, and convince him to help them.

I don't even know what Duke Rithan is really like or if he would just turn me away! Slander and rumors she'd heard in her visions of when she'd lived as Brendwald's mistress were all she had to go on, and she didn't dare believe most of them

And then there was Brendwald. If she left that night, once the knight staying at the inn found out she had left rather than promise herself to Brendwald, there would only be a few days before Brendwald would know of it. The thought of his retaliation should he find her gone left her shaking. She might be temporarily free, but what would happen to her father and brother? The duke might not overtly harm them, but there were other ways. She could see him using them like hostages–he practically was already hanging their wellbeing over her head like a well-placed snare.

And though harming the count and his heir directly might not be within immediate reach, the same cannot be said for Charlona and the others. She might be signing their death warrants by running. So, this is how it ends, huh? My bold move, my plan…all it comes down to is the same path in the end. Am I trapped in this fate no matter what I do? She pressed her fists to her chest for a moment to keep them from shaking.

Needing to move–to do something–Lianna went to her wardrobe, removed the chests, and picked up the false bottom. A leather bag of the last true jewelry pieces her mother had left her, her book of visions, a too-big rain cloak, a pair of plain clothes, and a wax cloth wrap full of dried meat and fruit was all she had gathered. It was enough to survive the trip alone. There was no way she could take her father with her, and if Aaron came with her, she would end up giving him the provisions, leaving herself to possibly starve. Taking their already meager staff would surely leave her father without any help and leave Aaron more vulnerable.

Panic forced her hand. I have to leave tonight. She had just resolved to try and take more provisions that night, when she heard a sharp intake of breath behind her. Turning, she saw the shocked face of Charlona. Lianna's eyes widened and her chest tightened. Lia, you dummy! How could you open these things now! Of course Harrace would alert Charlona that I was unwell after seeing me like that!

Waiting for someone to break the silence was like waiting for a guillotine to fall. Charlona's gaze flitted from the items in the wardrobe to Lianna and back again, and finally, she spoke. "Miss Lia…child, what is all this?" She came rushing forward, falling to her knees beside where Lianna already knelt, and placed her wash-weathered hands on either side of Lianna's face. "What has happened?"

Lianna's breath caught, and tears began to spill down her cheeks at Charlona's touch, but she gently pulled her nanny's hands away and held them in front of her. "I have to leave and find help for us. Brendwald will take me away from here and then slowly kill everyone or take everything I hold dear before I die an early death." Hearing it said out loud made her more sure, and the tightness in her chest loosened a little bit. Her trembling began to fade.

Charlona's eyes were wide, her mouth agape. "You know this to be true?"

Lianna nodded. She watched Charlona's expression become one of horror when she told her of the letter that was currently resting in the drawer of her father's bedside table. "He promises to help with our debt, but that will never be true. If he were truly generous, he would not be sending fraudulent merchants to sell our people adulterated goods and seed that will never sprout for their fields. I heard as much when I visited town several days ago." These truths about what was happening in town were things her father had kept to himself in her visions, but now, she knew them as well.

"Ah…then, what will we do? We can't send you to that man. How could your father even think of it!" Charlona's hands tightened around Lianna's even as her cheeks reddened at having just chastised her master and questioned his ability to make decisions.

For some reason, seeing someone else worry about this and take her side settled the circling thoughts in Lianna's mind. She had made a plan. She had been somewhat hopeful to enjoy more days with her family just like she had been, so much so that she'd lost sight of the fact that she had to do this. Even if she failed, the result was the same either way. Her bold actions were the only things that would change her visions. She had already proved that they could change, but this change was not enough. The outcome had only become expedited. She needed to diver the whole of it.

"I've found a weakness that we can exploit," she confessed to Charlona. "I'm going to ride as fast as I can to the Rithan duchy. I'll petition the duke to help us any way I can. But now that you know, I need to ask you to take care of Aaron and Father for me. If word doesn't come from Rithan duchy or myself in six days, I want you to take Aaron and gather up the other servants and guards. Leave, and go somewhere safe for as long as you can."

"But the count…"

"Father won't leave even if he was well enough to do so," Lianna said with sad surety. "But Brendwald will not be able to hurt him directly, at least not for a while. He's more likely to go after you and Benjamin and the others. If he gets his hands on Aaron, we are as good as done for anyway. But I will return or send help, as soon as I can."

Lianna waited while Charlona stared at their clasped hands. She was silent for several moments. Then, she nodded. "The late countess would have wanted to reach for any possibility. Knowing her, she would have taken you and Aaron and run off with you both even sooner, maybe years before now." Charlona gave Lianna a sad smile and moved to stand, pulling Lianna up with her.

In a breath, Charlona went from shocked and saddened to taking action. She extracted her hands from Lianna's and went to get a closer look at the provisions in the wardrobe. "This won't be nearly enough. Come. If we're all soon to be running, we might as well use up the food stores in the root cellar, shouldn't we?"

Charlona sprung up and grabbed Lianna's hand, seeming to have gained the energy of a much younger woman. She pulled Lianna along down the stairs, out the back of the manor, and through the drizzle of rain to the root cellar. There, Charlona directed Lianna on what to grab. Her nanny's sharp eye for this kind of preparation stunned Lianna into silence.

You'd think she had done something like this before. Lianna kept her nervous chuckle to herself, then pressed her lips together and focused on the task at hand.