Her eyelids slowly fell, isolating her from the last bit of contact in this human world. All the sights disappeared, all the sounds receded, and Ji Yunhe's last strand of consciousness, in the midst of the darkness, gave her a final image.
It was the day when Changyi took her away from the Grand Master's prison. He carried her in his arm, flew over a thousand hills, ten thousand layers of clouds, and landed on the top of a mountain.
The sun was about to rise, and Changyi held her against a boulder. It was the first time in six years they were alone together, looking directly into each other's eyes.
And that was what Ji Yunhe saw in the final moment of her life. Why? Ji Yunhe did not understand it.
She looked at Changyi, seeing him, and also seeing herself inside his eyes. The sun rose up behind him and he turned into a black silhouette, but the sea-like eyes still clearly reflected her face. As if looking into a mirror, Ji Yunhe saw herself shed a tear. The tear was crystal clear, and she once again felt a burning heartache.
"Big-tailed fish," she said to him, "I never betrayed you."
She said it. The hidden regret she had buried deep inside was now expressing itself at the very end of her life.
Ji Yunhe finally realized why she never told Changyi the truth. She lied all over the place about the greater good, deceiving both the monk and herself. But the real reason was... she was selfish, and afraid.
She was afraid that he would not forgive her even if she told him the truth. She was even more afraid that what she had done might have been a mistake from the beginning. That it was wrong for her to make the choice for him, wrong to plan with Lin Haoqing and drive him away, and wrong to stab him on that cliff and break his heart...
She was most afraid of Changyi blaming her for what he had become...
She shattered a heart that was innocent and pure, and disfigured a gentle, kind spirit into something completely different. It was a huge mistake. So she did not say anything. Did not want to, and did not dare to. And that was why she was seeing this right now, and hearing herself say it. I never betrayed you.
But it did not matter anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. When people died, they died. She would take everything with her and fade away.
Ji Yunhe watched as the sun grew brighter and hotter, until all of her surroundings turned white and Changyi disappeared. She looked up at the empty sky and closed her eyes. She had spent her entire life fighting for freedom and survival, struggling and wandering, now, she was finally… at peace.
Ji Yunhe died.
A matter of course. But when Changyi watched Ji Yunhe close her eyes, close her lips, and breathe out her last breath, he suddenly felt a stabbing pain. First like a frozen spear, then a burning hot iron, it pierced through him from inside and stopped at the heart.
Thump thump... He had never heard his heartbeat so clearly.
Thump thump...
Ji Yunhe was dead. That was a fact. His jiaozhu floated out of her lifeless body carrying her residual warmth, and disappeared inside him.
At that moment, Changyi felt as if...
… he also died.