Chapter 14: A Second Fool Appears Out of Nowhere

This shout startled Zhang Xiuchin, her face changing color. She didn't have time to put on a bra, and in a frantic rush, she grabbed her clothes and draped them over her body, hiding under the edge of the kang.

But before Zhang Xiuchin could even bend over, Second Fool was already standing in the doorway. "Auntie Zhang, what are you doing with your butt poked up in the air?" Second Fool asked with wide eyes.

"I'm catching crickets," said Zhang Xiuchin, forced to stand up awkwardly and start fastening her clothes.

"You need to strip to catch crickets? I saw your **** just now. They're even longer than my mom's," Second Fool said seriously.

"Nonsense, if you talk nonsense again, I'll smack your mouth!" Zhang Xiuchin stuffed her bra into her pocket and, with hands on her hips, said to Second Fool.

Second Fool got scared when he heard this and just stared at Zhang Xiuchin without speaking.

"Alright, alright." Yan Moshan also got down from the kang. "Second Fool, you can't tell anyone about what happened today, or you can forget about coming to the orchard for fruit."

"I won't tell, what's the big deal," said Second Fool, cocking his head.

Hearing this, Zhang Xiuchin's expression immediately softened, "Ah, that's right, Second Fool, you're so good. Next time I'll give you two candies at my shop."

"No, I want three!" insisted Second Fool, pouting.

"Okay, okay, three it is. You won't miss out on one," Zhang Xiuchin looked much happier and quickly turned to Yan Moshan, "I'm off, I'll come by another day to buy your apples." Then she ran off in a hurry.

"Moshan, what exactly did Aunt Li come here for?" Second Fool asked Yan Moshan as he watched Zhang Xiuchin leave.

"Didn't I tell you? She came to buy apples, looking for something fresh," Yan Moshan didn't want to discuss it with Second Fool. "You damn fool, sneaky as a ghost, such a troublemaker. You come in without a sound, and even Big Old Hei didn't bark at you!"

Second Fool laughed and pointed outside, "I brought A'hua with me, and it sure knows how to clear a path for me!"

Yan Moshan looked and saw Second Fool's frisky bitch A'hua, in the corner, being happily mounted by Ah Huang. "Good lord, Second Fool, you really did bring A'hua!"

"Didn't you say this morning that this way, when I come in, Big Old Hei won't bark?" Second Fool smiled proudly, "Heh, it really worked."

Yan Moshan huffed in exasperation, "Second Fool, what did you come here for?"

"Digging ditches. There're melons and fruits, I'd be dumb not to come!" Second Fool said smugly.

Yan Moshan couldn't help but smile wryly. "Alright, Second Fool, just keep digging like you did at noon. Once you're done, you can pick whatever you want from the orchard, take whatever you fancy!

"Alrighty!" said Second Fool, and, grabbing a shovel from the yard, he went on his way.

Returning to his room, Yan Moshan couldn't help but feel irritated; of all times for Second Fool to show up, it had to be then. Ah, it was so close!

Lost in thought, Yan Moshan dozed off until Second Fool came to wake him, and the two of them headed back to the village together.

Back home, when it was time for dinner, Xu Xiaona asked him why he looked so pale, wondering if he was ill.

Yan Moshan didn't respond, silently eating two flatbreads and drinking two bowls of porridge before heading off to the orchard.

Once in the orchard shed, Yan Moshan took off his pants and hopped onto the kang, lying down and eagerly peering down, his mind filled with fantasies of sleeping with a woman.

Yan Moshan threw his head back, falling onto the bed and lamenting, "Today was really unlucky, it was so close!" Afterward, he kept pounding the straw mat, "Oh, heavens, are you playing with me?"

The sound was full of sorrow, and even Big Old Hei at the door was frightened, stretching his neck and barking twice. Yan Moshan peered out the window to see what was going on, but everything was still; he only saw Big Old Hei standing at the doorway, tail between its legs.

"Damn it, what frightened Big Old Hei? Could there be a wolf around?" Yan Moshan got dressed, grabbed the harpoon from under the bed, and tiptoed into the yard. Seeing Yan Moshan emerge, Old Black finally wagged its tail a little and whimpered.

Yan Moshan was silent as he walked to the gate, peering through the gaps in the bamboo fence by the light of the moon. All was quiet, no sign of trouble. "Useless dog, too worn out from mating with A'hua to be of any use, you coward."

Just as a dejected Yan Moshan was dragging his harpoon back to the house, suddenly a voice came from outside the gate, "Who were you cursing just now?" Startled, Yan Moshan steadied himself before realizing it was Third Uncle Xu Fusheng.