Save Him!

Fluctuating ripples of light in a variety colors shimmered out of the opening of the plain white satchel into the surroundings.

I was in awe of the beautiful lights as they danced across the walls of the stone cliff. However, I soon came back to the realization of our predicament. I swiftly closed and tied the white satchel. In my quick movements, I almost dropped the white bag.

"Careful, you nincompoop! You nearly dropped my gifts from Gonk! You could have broken my treasures! How would you pay me back Number Two!? You're completely broke!"

I looked at the white bag with fear, but not from Number One's usual ridiculous bantering. Never. Never would I be afraid of Number One. What I was afraid of were the contents of the plain white satchel.

Not that the contents themselves were dangerous, but those who controlled them definitely were. This was larger than me and Number One. Heck, this was larger than even Gonk, the Son of Heaven. This was the first and probably last time I would see the miraculous contents of the bag. Maybe the last time I would be seeing at all if I wasn't dead. I was afraid, but had an odd sense of longing and wanted to crack open the satchel again. However, Number One's usual complaints rang in my head, and I stopped my hands from opening the white satchel.

"Why'd you do that for, Number Two!? I wanted to enjoy the color show more! It was like a daytime starry night sky! It was so beautiful!"

I understood what Number One was saying. I too was mesmerized as well, but that didn't stop me from remembering the dangerous place I was in. I answered Number One's question as I ran back to Hond City.

"Did you forget where we were, Number One?! And didn't you hear the conversation between Gonk and Sister Scarlett? We have another situation on our hands. Literally, it's in our hand."

"You mean the Soul Crystals in the white satchel? Aren't they a blessing for us? Now we can live like kings, Number Two! If you don't want to then I will. You can just sit back and let me take control. You better not complain later though!"

"Oh? And how are we going to do that, Number One?! All you can think about is money, but you forget the details about how to get it."

I had to take a breather. I was baffled by how blindsided Number One was when it came to money. Taking in a full breath, I vented my full rant to Number One.

"Untainted Soul Crystals are no longer showing up in the veins of Soul Crystal mines. Because the untainted Soul Crystals are so rare, they are tightly controlled and distributed by the sects! They're highly regulated that non-cultivators like us would never see them, let alone have a whole white satchel full of them! We can't sell them to the non-cultivators. We can't sell them to the righteous factions. We can't sell them the demonic factions. Selling the Soul Crystals to any of them would get others to come directly after us! It's a disaster waiting to happen, especially with Gonk now taken prisoner."

Number Two paused. He finally understood why I was afraid. Numbskull, he needed me to break it down for him.

"Then what are we supposed to do? This is such a waste of a treasure! Our dreams can finally come true! We can buy a large house in Hond City, fill it up with money, and roll around in it all day! Forever!"

"That's your dream Number One, not mine. Sorry to burst your bubble, but your dream wouldn't last very long because you'd awaken to be captured, tortured and then killed. The satchel we have is the future of humanity. It's priceless. I don't know how the two fox ladies missed it, but if they knew, we wouldn't have gotten it so easily."

Realization of the larger problem seemed to hit Number One as he remained silent. I was battered by the branches of the vegetation again as I ran, but didn't pay attention. I only cared to get back to the safety of our room in the shack-like building. Honestly, it didn't provide much safety, but It was the only place I could think of. It was home to me and Number One for a long time now.

Running with the satchel in hand was a hassle, and I attempted to toss it into my ring of holding, but something odd happened. It was rejected and unable to enter. I was perplexed. Number One noticed the oddity as well, and he commented in my mind.

"How is that even possible?! Isn't it a bag of Soul Crystals? Why didn't it go into our ring of holding?"

Curious of the situation and not because I really, really wanted to touch the Soul Crystal, I looked around for a less conspicuous space to try touching the, I mean, try placing just a Soul Crystal inside my ring of holding.

"Ha! My lying has finally rubbed off on you! How unlike you to not just bluntly say what you think. You must really want those Soul Crystals."

I was almost appalled. Me? Becoming like Number One? Never.

"Hey! It's an honor you're becoming like me, Number Two!"

I shuddered. I will not, thank you. There was something about the Soul Crystals. Something deep inside wanted to touch them and hold them. I was surprised Number Two didn't sense it.

"Of course I felt like touching and holding the Soul Crystals! I wanted to hold them and take them to sell quickly."

I facepalmed. Of course. How like Number One.

Looking around I saw a small den underneath one of the large towering trees. Really wanting to understand why I felt so drawn to the Soul Crystal, I quickly made my way inside. The compelling feeling for the Soul Crystal in my gut was growing and almost felt like wanting to eat it. Hurriedly, I took off the wrapped twine, and a burst of colorful light illuminated the dim den.

I didn't hesitate. Reaching my hand inside the round white satchel, I pull out the colorful gem. It radiated not only the mystifying light, but a warmth that seeped deep into my being. It seeped into my soul. Ah. I see. Hence Soul Crystal. Makes sense. I closed my eyes and embraced the warm feeling. For some reason, I recalled the sound crystal and the recorded woman's voice. However, instead of drawing in the energy of the universe, I drained in the Soul Crystal. But it suddenly stopped. The warm feeling disappeared. Opening my eyes, the Soul Crystal in my hand was gone. Vanished.

"What did you do, Number Two?! No! My treasure! You ate it! Spit it back out!"

"Stop uttering nonsense, Number One. Did you see me swallow it? I only held on to it. Geez."

"Then where is it? It can't just disappear into thin air!"

I thought for a bit, and realized the feeling of wanting to eat the Soul Crystal was slightly satiated, but not completely. So I took out another one and repeated what I did. Number One may have been right.

"See you did eat it! Undo what you just did! Give me back my Soul Crystals!"

Coming out of my second trance, so did my logical reasoning. My urge to consume the Soul Crystal was no more. How odd. Annoyed by the nagging voice of Number One, he needed some more reminding.

"Did you forget our rule, Number One? Whoever is the main person controlling our body takes sixty percent, and the other gets forty percent. I used my own share and not yours. So stop your false accusations."

"Hmpf. Fine, but I'm counting how many you're using. You better not use any of my share!"

So says the greedy Number One who tried to claim all the Soul Crystals to himself. With my strange urge to touch the Soul Crystal satiated, I was now curious if I could place the Soul Crystal in my ring of holding. Surprising, the Soul Crystal I took out did not go into the Ring of Holding.

"Why aren't the Soul Crystals going into the ring of holding, Number Two? Aren't they just pretty and shiny rocks? How could that be? The only thing that can't go into the ring of holding are things that are alive. Could it be?"

I felt like Number One was onto something. Maybe he could use his brain.

"OUR BRAIN, stupid Number Two! If something is wrong with OUR BRAIN, then you're just as stupid! Huh. That was pretty smart of me. Right Number One? That deduction was spot on."

I was kind of shocked. Did the Soul Crystals make Number One smarter somehow? We really don't know what their uses were. But according to Gonk earlier, the Soul Crystals were what gave the human cultivators their overwhelming power, which is now under the control of the Sentient Beasts. However, we still didn't know why the Soul Crystals couldn't enter the ring of holding, but why did Gonk put the precious crystals in this plain white satchel? Why did the fox ladies not recognize them? They seemed to see through our clothes…

"Don't remind me, Number Two! They saw nothing! I'll show Sister Ivy! That plain satchel was Gonk's way of not drawing attention. Since he couldn't place them in his ring of holding he must have kept it in something plain but able to not allow others to see its contents."

Damn. What do those Soul Crystals do!? Did they really make Number One smarter? But what about me? I still sound the same. There has to be something more to them that I'm not aware of.

"Be quiet Number Two! I heard footsteps nearby!"

I quickly closed and tied up the white satchel. I was baffled by Number One's sudden changes. Now he had better attention as well? He used to only be caught up in his lust for coins. How strange. How very strange.

"THIS WAY! I THOUGHT I SAW SOMETHING OVER HERE!"

"GOOOONNK! WHERE ARE YOU GONK!"

"HOW FAR DID HE GO!? HOW FAR DID HE CHASE THAT PERVERT!"

"HE BETTER NOT DONE ANYTHING TO GONK OR WE'LL KILL HIM!"

"I'M GOING TO RIP HIM APART!"

"BURN HIM! CHOP OFF HIS HEAD!"

I gulped. I didn't do well with craze fanatics.

The heavy pressure from the dense qi created from Gonk's crazy fangirls weighed down comparably to Sister Scarlett's. These fanatics were powerful. More than Gonk. Damn. Number One's trouble making followed us to no end.

"Number Two, switch with me. I'll take care of this. Don't worry."

Who was this new person in my head? He sounds like Number One, but he couldn't be. Number One resolving his own problems? Really? I had to make sure there wasn't another split personality in our head.

"Who are you!? Identify yourself!"

"Who else other than the great and forgiving being that is I, Number One. Rest assured Number Two. I shall handle this. Switch with me."

I didn't know if the voice in my head was really Number One, but I liked this new change of not having to deal with problems so I switched with Number One.

***

"HAHAHA! Number One! Back in action! See how a professional takes care of such predicaments. Be sure to take notes Number Two!"

"I take back what I said. You may have seemed to change, but you're still an annoying asshole."

I ignored my cynical other half. I would show him up through my actions.

"Be prepared to be amazed, Number Two!"

With strong digging motions, I created a deep hole and threw in the satchel of Soul Crystals. Using some of the handfuls of dirt, I slathered my clothes and open skin in the dirt and grime. I dashed out towards the shouting fangirls, desperately searching for Gonk. Faking a limp, I trudged over in the hollering fangirls' direction. I dare say with the cuts and bruises from running through the vegetation, I looked legitly injured.

With my costume complete, I began my act.

"HELP!!! SAVE GONK!!! ANYONE PLEASE!!! PLEASE SAVE MY BENEFACTOR!!!"