I Am Still Here

I do not know how much time had passed, I just kept floating around the world. Time didn't exist for me. But I gathered knowledge.

At least, I know I was doing something meaningful, instead of watching people do their own things.

I had long since forgotten about the Pridal Kingdom because I didn't have any ties to the place anymore. The man that used to be my father when I was on Earth was long gone. Even I thought I would see him on this side, but I guess because I had unfinished business and was still holding on to the strings of this world, we missed each other. He must be in a different place now.

When I was alive, I didn't know that the world, or should I say the universe, was so vast, beyond any human's wildest imaginations. It was incredible. I traveled through many dimensions, flew to many countries, understanding what I needed to do.

The most shocking thing was how I didn't need sleep. I had loved to sleep when I was still alive before that woman planned my murder. She was the only thing I could think of... like an obsession now but she was dead now too.

Her death hadn't given me pleasure because it wasn't at my hands... it was from a festering boil that had refused to heal. That served her right but still...

While she lived, pretending to be innocent, and everyone buying her story because she had produced an heir, I was so furious... so furious, that I couldn't do anything to her from this side. I hope that our paths would cross again. I will make her regret ever knowing me. She would regret marrying my earthly father. She would regret being alive the same period I was alive.

How can I get stronger? How can I become more powerful in this state?

I couldn't even scare my murderer... so annoying. When I was alive, I thought ghosts could do some things, at least.

On my way to my favorite spirit library, I met the guardian at the gate- a very huge bird that had the body of a snake. I had met many, many spirit animals that didn't look like the regular animals I knew back on Earth. Some had really negative energy, and it was advised not to mingle with those ones as they were lost and looking for people or even spirits, to devour.

"You have returned, Sei", the bird said. That was my spirit name, and it had stuck all through the unknown time I spent in this dimension.

I had always admired the large feathers on its body. They had a rich oxblood color that glittered with a purple light. It was confusing but picturesque. Its face wasn't as nice though because it had a huge, regular mouth instead of a beak. It was an awful sight. So, anytime I came here to study and it would talk to me, I would focus my sight on its body, avoiding by all means, its face.

This time was different.

As I was about to respond, it was as if I wanted to vomit from my core.

[But I am not supposed to feel this way. I have no organs, I do not eat. What is this?]

It was like I was folding into myself... "HELP". I couldn't even shout, I felt like I was disintegrating. "What is happening?"... "I still have something to do. No!"

I saw myself being taken at a blinding speed downward... "Hell?". Everywhere was dark. I couldn't see anything, all that filled my ears was, "WHOOOOOO". I wondered where I would find myself next. The uncertainty wasn't pleasant.

* * *

On Earth...

"PUSH!!"

"The baby is taking time to come out. Oh! I can see the legs. We have to turn her", one of the nurses said.

Xue Jing was screaming... her face had become red, "Where is my husband? Please call my husband. I want him in here with me"... she cried, drenched in sweat, her fringe sticking to her forehead.

Ren Jing was outside the door looking in through the transparent space, his face looked like he had been crying as well.

This is their third attempt at childbirth. The first two weren't successful as they were both stillbirths. It had been painful to the lovely couple.

When an assistant nurse opened the door, "Mr. Ren Jing, your wife ne-", he brushed past her and dashed into the room. Going to the left side of the bed, he grabbed his wife's hand, "It will be fine, my darling. Stay strong". "Nurse! If we have to switch to surgery, let's do it. She looks like she is in a lot of pain. It's unbearable"

"Sir, I only asked you in here because she requested for you. We are trying our best, do not worry, the baby was only breached. I have successfully turned her". She looked at Xue, "Two more strong pushes okay... and you will be holding your child in no time", she gave a reassuring smile.

* * *

I was hearing words like 'Push'... 'Now', and it felt like I was in a little bottle.

I didn't understand what was happening, but from my angle, I didn't think I could do anything about it.

"Be patient, Sei. You will figure it out"

Then I heard a man's voice... "This time, we will carry our baby, Xue. Be strong for me, okay?"

"WHERE THE HELL AM I?" "BABY?"

I didn't even know these people... what strange names. The noise was too much.

I have never felt pressed, but now I did. I wanted to come out of where I was, I needed to breathe. "LET ME OUT", but I didn't hear my voice the way I used to.

* * *

"WHAAAAA!"

"Yes! Get me the scissors"...the nurse said.

A baby's loud cry filled the room. The nurses wondered why his baby was crying so loudly, it seemed she was shouting.

"Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Jing. You have a baby girl. A healthy one"... the Head Nurse said.

* * *

I could see human beings... so close to me. I could smell them.

At last, I was out of the darkness and fluid. That place was uncomfortable.

Is this air?

I am breathing!!

Then I heard, "We didn't have to spank her. She wanted to come out by all means" (laughter)

They were talking about me.

"Do you want to carry her, Mrs. Jing?"

Carry who?

Then I noticed that I was being passed to a woman that looked like she had just come out of a fight, with a man standing beside her, smiling. The smile was so wide, I pitied the muscles in his face.

"My baby!!! See our daughter, Ren", the woman said.

[Oh my! I am in a baby's body. That is the only explanation. Oh, my stars! I think I am on Earth again]

I tried to say "Hello" to the woman that looked at me with so much love, but nothing came out. Suddenly, I felt a deep sleep attempting to overtake me, and I was sure that in seconds, I fell asleep.