Chapter Thirteen

Yeah.. Space is what I need, away from Justin, away from the only boy that captured my heart with just a look. I can't be away from him, he's like my breathing aid but I must. I need to clear my head and think to know whether I really love Justin or it's just teenage infatuation since we spend much time together these days.

For the past two weeks, I've drifted away from all the activities I found exciting or pleasure in. I've quit cheer, my best friend cheating on me with my ex boyfriend while we were still dating. She said Dustin asked her out but she told me declined because he was a play boy and he asked me out the next day which I agreed to be his girlfriend. She said ever since then she had hated me with passion that she's always second to me in everything, in looks, brains, fashion, wealth and even in terms of popularity, my best friend since second grade, I though I knew her but I didn't at all. I was kept in the dark all this while.

She's now the school's bitch, she harasses and is being mean to almost everyone even her own boyfriend Josh. She dumped him and looked for someone else, her business I thought. She gives juniors wedgies, take their lunch and do all sorts of things that even I cant comprehend to do such. I was at home all alone since I told my mom that I wasn't feeling well, she believed cos I was looking like a crazy witch that has twenty cats.

I was sad, unhappy and depressed. I missed him so much already and it hasn't been a day. I tried to sleep I dreamt that Justin and Hailey wed, it was terrible. I tried watching TV, a sappy love movie comes up about a boy and a girl that can't be together because the girl's parents object to their union cos there of some hereditary curse in the boys family. Would my parents do that too because Justin's blind? Well. I don't care about their opinion, I love him too much to care.

Yes, I said it! I love Justin! I love him so so much! How can I ever deny my attraction to him? How can I ignore the butterflies in my head singing their nightly serenade at the thought of him? How can I live without his kisses? Everything reminds me of him! I tried to do something useful and I end up researching on the project I was paired up to do with Justin, I thought.

I was almost at the last page of my research on the project then I remembered my time with Justin, I smiled sadly. I didn't know I was crying until a drop of my tears fell on the book in front of me, then another followed, another one, another, until I couldn't take it anymore. I cried, cried and cried my eye out into my palms, I can't be away from him. I miss him so much.

I put me head on my reading table I was sitting at and let the tears flow and darkness took over. 'Honey.. Honey.. Sleep on the bed sweetie not on a chair', I heard my mom's voice say. She stood me up and took me to bed and laid me down on it, she took off my shoes and pulled the cover over my head and kissed my forehead before she went out and closed the door behind her. A tear rolled down my cheek and I whispered 'Justin' letting sleep take over me.

I was weak by the time I woke up the next day. I felt like dying and have no strength in me. My temperature was boiling and my voice was hoarse. My mom wanted to take me to my dad's hospital but I objected saying I just needed to sleep more and rest a little and to my surprise that's what my dad also said I need. My mom had no option but to let me stay in at home again. It was my second day of being alone at home and it doesn't seem that bad. Just boring and not having anything interesting to do.

I felt as if I was forgetting something until I saw an actress in the TV holding a cellphone, my phone I finally remembered. I hadn't touched or seen my phone for the past two days now. I ran up the stairs and searched for my school bag since its the last place I left it in. I found it and I power on the phone and found out I had twenty eight messages and five voicemail from none other than my beloved, Justin.

I listened to the voicemail he sent me telling me how much he misses me and craves my presence. His message makes me cry saying he's sorry and I should forgive him if he had done something to me and I can't be away from him any much longer. He's always the one to say sorry even though he didn't or never does something wrong.

He's perfect and too good for him. I sat on the edge of my bed and read his messages while I thought his much my actions affect him rather than me. I have never been as happy as I was with Justin. He lit up my world and brought that sparkles in my life shining bright like the stars in the night. I checked his last message saying he has an appointment with the doctor and wants me to go with him.

Oh my Justin, my poor Justin, even after I hurt him, he still cares and think about me. I'm miserable without me. I was selfish and didn't think about Justin feelings. I didn't discuss my intentions with him and he was hurt. I wiped the tears away from my cheeks and went out to meet Justin. I love him too much to see him hurt.

I walked down the down the stairs to the front door and shouted on my way out, 'I'm going out for fresh air'

and shut the door behind me. I walked down our neighborhood to Justin's, I got to his place less than ten minutes really anxious. I rang the bell and his mom came to answer it. 'Kylie? it's been so long since we have seen houses here! Come on in', I stepped inside the house.

'Yeah, I've been busy. Is Justin home?', I asked not wanting Justin's mom to question me anymore. 'Yeah, he's up in his room. Do you know your way there or I should take you?'. Though I know his room, this is my first time of venturing and staying longer than thirty minutes with his parents around, 'No, I don't know. Please show me the way', I answered politely.

'Come with me them' and I followed her up the stairs down to Justin's room which is at the end of the hall. She knocked and said, 'Justin, Kylie is here', and shuffling was heard inside. She patted my shoulder and left. I breathe in and out, and knocked and entered his room. 'Hey', I said croaking quietly.

He didn't respond, I felt hurt and I almost regret why I came here. 'I know you are hurt and I am the reason. I'm really sorry and I understand if you can't find its in your heart to forgive but I will still ask for your forgiveness. I'm really sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you, I'm sorry for playing with your feelings. I know you don't wanna see me or talk to me, I would do the same if I were you. I know you hate me but I just want you to know that I love you. I love you so so much! These few days we spent apart hurt more than ever in my life. I miss you Justin and I came here to tell you that and to say that I wish you all the best in your appointment', tears rolled down my eyes uncontrollably.

I turned and was about to open the door when I felt a pair of hands around my waist, that buzzing euphoric feeling was back and I melted away in his hold. He turned me to face him and and rested his head on my shoulder and took a big whiff of my decent and held my cheeks in his palm, 'Say it again', he whispered.

'I love you'.

'Say it again!'.

'I love you Justin. I love you so much. I'm in love with you'.

'I've always loved you Kylie. I've always loved you from afar. I pray that you will notice me even if it's just for once', he said and kissed my forehead. 'I... ', I tried to say but was cut off when I felt a pair of lips against mine. Justin kissed me like his life depended on it, putting all the words and emotions he couldn't express into the kiss.

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Chapter update.

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