Having a system is a pain in the ass, just ask those that had one

"This is ridiculous." A dirty teenager suddenly woke up from his slumber in the street.

He seemed to be in his mid-teens, but it's ordinary that he doesn't look like it because of the state his features had aged by years of living on the streets.

He's wearing tattered clothes, and a broken down box served as his bed. A can with several pieces of coins were at his side, along with a sign that read, "gib cash."

His eyes that have always been sunken due to his plight is unnaturally gleaming right at this moment.

'Holy shit! Is this real? Have I become a Superhuman now?'

Even the most destitute people in the world wanted to be one.

His eyes that seemed to have regained life are infectious. An elderly homeless man— with a separate can and box— struck up conversation jovially.

"What's up kiddo? Someone dropped big bucks? Let's share the blessings!" This guy is already nodding as if they're close. His approach should elicit a punch to the gut on a normal day, as he took the can and was disappointed at what he saw.

"What now, old Lin, can't I be full of life just this once?" He stood up and started packing his nonexistent belongings.

"You don't even have enough to have bread for dinner! Come here, let's share mine." Surprisingly, this fellow homeless old man isn't half-bad. The people of the streets value these kinds of friendships more than anything, as it can always be the difference between being able to fight another day and collapsing due to a lot of factors.

"It's alright, old Lin, I have a proposition for you instead. Don't you want my sleeping box?"

Rick Rowland was hopping, skipping, and whistling as he weaved through the city's huge streets. Who wouldn't be in high spirits if they get a system?

Upon further notice of his lax attitude though, this guy doesn't even know what the hell kinda system he has. He doesn't know how it works. He doesn't know what triggers missions, if there's any. He doesn't know what this system in his head will give him, or take from him.

So how did you even think it's a system? Maybe you're fooling around with us and you're actually just deranged?

'Should I think about how this thing works? That's how those main characters do it.'

Finally. You realized what all this is about.

'Hmmm… nah. Thinking will make me unable to think. So I'm just gonna wait for some kind of notification. That happens too, right?'

Rick smiled like a creep.

Why do I even care about what this dumbo's thinking when he isn't even thinking?

Rick put both of his hands on the pockets of his jeans that hadn't been washed since he got it in a bargain store three years ago, as he leaned at the wall of a huge apartment complex downtown.

He looked like a drug dealer.

"Welcome. You random guy. What do you wanna be in this life?"

Inside Rick's head, was a robotic voice, that was as bland as it sounded like. Could it be… the system?

Rick was so shocked he spaced out for who knows how long. I for sure don't know how long that pause was.

"Hey, punk! What do you want? You're actually annoying." The voice in his head sounded even more annoying with the monotone and the lack of emotion. Though, I can't fault him for being annoyed.

He snapped out of his daze in a hurry, and thought about what people like him want in life. Then, his eyes glittered.

He looked like a creep.

"Hey, don't look at your right, there's a creeper." A passerby said to his girlfriend.

"Hey, don't look at that man leaning against the wall, he's a creep." An author said to his readers.

"I wanna be the strongest of them all!" That's it? That's what you want?

Rick heard some sort of a sigh inside his head before the voice came. "I'm disappointed. What you want is the most boring 'want' you could've wanted. I'm a system, and I'm disappointed. Can you imagine it?" His mouth twitched in annoyance.

"What's wrong with wanting to be the strongest?! It's what everyone wanted to be!' He's irritated by the apparent disdain the system is showing his dream. 'I can't even see you and yet you're showing me disdain?"

Man, what are you, a shonen manga protagonist?

"Fine… I'm gonna be the strongest system for you. Sigh… why am I bending my principles for a teenager's wet dreams?" A disappointed emoji face appeared in Rick's mind.

The system also had dreams of its own! It wanted to be a system for someone smart! But the world is always too wicked. So it had to give priority to this average joe's dumb dreams, than its own.

"I don't wet my box anymore! I'm not a kid now, I'm sixteen!"

Why are you so defensive all of a sudden?

"System… sigh… Initializing…" Beeps that could be heard only by Rick rang out inside his head.

Why is a sigh in there? Are you so disappointed you sound like you're being forced?

"Hey! I can hear you sighing from out here!" Rick's face is smiling like a person that is about to murder someone.

I guess I have to tell you that no one should allow this guy to smile.

"I am a system committed to letting your dreams come true. Now… here's your stats." The robotic voice was lackadaisical, as if he can't tolerate any more of this bullshit.

Rick didn't even care about this indifferent system's voice. The mere mention of the system letting his dreams come true had already sent this beggar into ecstasy. Add to the fact that his stats are about to be shown by the system, is already enough to send his mind into a silent frenzy.

Literally like, "Wooooohhhh! My dreams! I'm gonna be the strongest! Yes! This is the shit! I'm gonna be rich too!"

Something like that.

Now I can sympathize with the system.

---

Name: Rick Rowland

Age: 16

Occupation: Homeless Bum

Grade: D

Power Level: 0.8

Remarks: Why are you so weak? A random old man can beat you up.

---

Damn, what a lame stat window! Are you really a system? Can't you give any more info than that?

"Really system? Are you joking with me? 0.8? Am I not even an average human?" The lowlife given a system didn't know whether to laugh or cry. He can't accept that his power level is even worse than an average human.

How can he be the strongest with just eight tenths of a point?

He didn't even realize that the system called him a helpless— I mean… cough, cough... hopeless bum… cough… homeless...

"Duh. That's why you have a system. If you're ridiculously strong I wouldn't bother." The indifferent attitude of the system continued. "Though I'm starting to wonder if I shouldn't bother with the likes of you…"

Rick flipped his middle finger high up to the sky while smiling like a sexual predator. Why is he doing this? I don't know, I'm puzzled too.

"I can be the strongest with your help, right?" Putting his dirty hands back down to his pockets, this bum's determination grew. "I'll be the strongest, with your help!"

Speechless and displeased, the system didn't banter with him and just gave the very first system mission.

Mission: Steal ten pieces of female undergarments.