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CHAPTER EIGHTY ONE:

While Severus was busy with his first class Harry stayed in the dungeon quarters, having an hour to spare before the first trial of the day would begin.

Deciding to try something, he said clearly, "Could all Potter and Black house elves come here?" To his surprise it worked, one earsplitting crack sounding as a large number of house elves appeared simultaneously. Harry's ears were ringing from the noise, not having clapped his hands up over his ears fast enough to block out the sound, but the number of house elves present had his eyes widening.

Inhaling deeply and dropping his hands, his eyes roamed over the faces looking up at him. "You're all either Potter or Black elves?" he asked incredulously, and saw Dobby cocking his head at him.

"Of course, Master Harry!" the elf replied, and Harry saw several of the other elves give Dobby shocked or horrified looks for speaking to a Master in such a way.

Harry sighed. "Alright, let's get a bit of order in here. All Potter elves please stand on the right," he gestured, "and the Black elves on the left." Dobby immediately bounded off to the right while Winky, Zipky, Lurch and Reggy moved over to the left. The other elves looked either confused or apprehensive at not being able to follow an order.

"We is Potter-Black elves, Master," an unusually small elf spoke up shyly, and when Harry saw that another elf was going to shush her he gave her a smile despite his growing headache.

"Thank you, that's good to know. What's your name?" he asked kindly, and the little elf smiled delightedly at him.

"I is Skip!" she – at least, he was pretty sure it was a female elf – replied happily, and his smile grew.

"That's a great name, Skip," he said, and she beamed at him. "So you're all Potter-Black elves?" he asked the wider group, receiving nods and squeaked "Yes, Master"s in reply. "So you serve both the Potter and Black families? Or do you only serve me?" The house elves looked unsure.

"Skip," Harry addressed the small elf, leaning over to be closer on her height, "will you hear it if someone not a Master calls your name?"

"No, Master," the elf replied promptly, shaking her head. "Skip is not hearing a call from anyone but a Master."

Harry hummed pensively, then stood. "I'll be back in just a minute, okay? I'm going to go see if someone can call you, so appear if you hear a call, alright, Skip?"

"Yes Master!" Skip squeaked, the elves parting before him as he made his way to the door.

"Oh, and Dobby, Winky, Zipky, Reggy, Lurch? You can go back to what you were doing. Thank you for coming." A murmur went through the present elves when he said all of their names – a lot of Masters only called them "elf" instead of learning their names. Being thanked for appearing was something completely new to the elves as well, and they watched incredulously as the Black elves bowed and popped away, Dobby giving their Master a grinning salute before doing the same. To their surprise their Master only grinned, shaking his head slightly, and repeated that he'd be right back before heading out the door. As soon as the door closed behind him hushed conversations started – Black Zipky had told them that their Master was wonderful, but this was much, much more than they had expected.

Meanwhile Harry swiftly made his way to Severus's classroom, knocking three times and waiting for the call to enter before opening the door. To his surprise he found that the classroom was brighter than he had ever seen it, all students focused on their teacher with obvious interest, and Harry couldn't help but grin as he took a step inside.

"Sorry for the interruption," he apologized. "I just need Harry to say one word for me and then I'll be gone, I promise." Severus simply inclined his head, so Harry craned his head to catch Harry's eye, then paused. "Wait, I can't say the word myself otherwise this won't work," he realized, and jogged over to the desk his younger self sat at. Grabbing his quill, he jotted down 'SKIP' before giving Harry an expectant look.

"Skip?" the teenager said cautiously, and Harry rolled his eyes. "She's a house elf. Try calling her."

"Skip," came the prompt call, but nothing happened.

"Huh," Harry said, straightening again and putting down the quill. "I guess that means that she only answers to a Potter-Black, and not a Potter or a Black." Pausing, he turned to look at Draco Black. "Could you give it a try?"

Draco sneered but complied, and again nothing happened. "Alright, only Potter-Blacks, then," Harry nodded. "Thanks, Severus," he smiled at his lover, who quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Anytime, Harry," the man drawled drily, and Harry laughed, suddenly tempted to have Severus try to call Skip but knowing that doing that would make their relationship obvious to the students. They already looked shocked enough at their Professor calling him by his first name. Giving Severus a parting smile he jogged out again, rejoining his new house elves.

"Alright, it looks like you only answer to Potter-Blacks," Harry smiled at the small congregation who had clearly been discussing something – probably him – animatedly while he was gone. "That isn't all too useful, though, so I'll be bonding you into either the Potter or the Black family, alright? I'm the only Potter-Black, and I'd like you to be able to answer to others as well." Some of the house elves looked apprehensive at the thought of having more Masters, but most seemed excited.

"Alright, let's see. Are any of you friends already, or family? Please stand together if you'd like to go to the same House, and if any of you prefer one House over the other please choose a side to stand on. Again, Potter House on the right and Black House on the left." The house elves looked dazed at being offered such a choice but shifted until they were standing in small groups, a few elves choosing the Potter family but none drifting over to the left side of the room.

"So you don't care which family you go to?" he asked the middle group for clarification, and had to smile at Skip's happy "Nope, Master!". "Great," he said, going down on one knee to face them properly. "Then I'll bring you into the Potter family first," he smiled over at the few elves standing to his right, and they approached when he waved his hand invitingly.

"I'm afraid I won't be able to remember all of your names," he said apologetically to the group, "but I'd like to hear each of your names anyway. Shall we start with you?" he smiled at a lanky elf who looked like he wasn't quite done growing yet. Holding out his hand, it took a moment before the elf hesitantly grasped it, his expression suggesting that he couldn't believe a Master was giving him his hand.

"What's your name?" Harry asked with a friendly smile, and the elf swallowed before saying quietly, "Jips, Master."

"Nice to meet you, Jips," the Lord replied, giving the hand in his a reassuring press. "I, Harry James Potter-Black, take Jips the house elf into the Potter family." A flare of blue light enveloped the two figures, and Harry felt a soft awareness of the elf settle into his magical core – not as strongly as Dobby's had, but maybe that was because of the bond of friendship he and Dobby shared. "Welcome to the House of Potter," Harry said, not releasing the elf's hand just yet. "Please call me Master Harry, or Master Potter-Black if there are formal guests around. There's only one other member of House Potter at the moment – the new Lord Potter, Harry Potter, who's a younger version of myself." Suddenly Harry grinned. "You can call him Master Jarry." He had heard from Severus that his younger self, Ron and Hermione had given him the nickname 'Hames', so it seemed proper payback to give his younger self an equally terrible nickname.

"That goes for all of you soon-to-be Potter elves, by the way," he said, letting go of Jips' hand at last and motioning for him to step aside. "Also, there are two things that are not negotiable. All my elves are given one galleon a week and a day off a month; what you choose to do with your money and free days are up to you, but you are my servants and not my slaves." The idea of being paid stirred them up, and not in a good way, but Harry continued talking. "The second non-negotiable thing is that no matter the circumstances, no matter the order, and regardless of who's giving you the order, NONE of you is EVER to obey an order that would cause you physical harm. That means not to iron your ears, shut your fingers in the oven, bash your head against the wall… I don't care what you've done, but if there's something that merits punishment then we'll figure something better out. Personally, I think my punishment of choice would be for you to spend time standing in a corner, or an entire week where you're not allowed to do any work." He shrugged at their horrified looks. "That's a pretty bad punishment to you, isn't it? Not being allowed to do anything?"

"That's so mean," Skip whispered, and Harry laughed.

"Yes! But that's the point, isn't it? Punishment is to ensure that you don't do something again that you're not supposed to, but having you hurt yourselves is just cruel. I don't think I'll need to punish any of you – I'm sure you're all excellent house elves – but I wanted to find something that doesn't hurt you."

"A wise choice," a voice said from the back, and Harry smiled at the elf that appeared nearly ancient.

"Thank you. That reminds me, too – you'll all be learning to read, write, count, and do basic math. That, too, is non-negotiable, as is the fact that you'll all get a uniform to wear. You saw the outfits Winky and Dobby were wearing?" Scattered nods, and some very excited expressions. "Well, you'll all get one of those; in fact, I hope to visit the tailor right after we finish here. How does that sound?" A cheer went up among the house elves, and Harry grinned.

"Alright then! Let's finish with the Potter elves and then we'll see where to put the rest of you," he smiled at the closest elf. "Your name is?"

And so it went, Harry accepting elves into the Potter family before going to fetch the records of the many properties he now owned. Once he realized that the House of Potter had more properties to maintain than the House of Black he swore another half of the remaining house elves into the Potter family before bonding to most of the others as Lord Black. Addressing all of the house elves he had already sworn into the two families, he told them that he now owned a lot of other properties and that they could decide between themselves which house elves would clean and maintain which, but that they no longer served any families that might live in the houses.

"Any former Death Eaters that go free no longer own you, and if they want to have a house elf work for them they'll have to pay that elf wages to cook and clean. The house elf still answers to me and doesn't have to do anything he or she isn't paid to do, and if there are any problems with the employers the house elf should immediately come to me and I'll deal with it. Would any of you be interested in such a job? I'm afraid that there won't be much chance to cook for the Potter family, at least, so working for another family will give you something to do." Several house elves indicated that they'd be interested in it, realizing that there really wouldn't be much work when there were only five people in the Potter and Black families.

"Great," Harry smiled at them. "I don't know yet which families might need house elves, but I'll let you know as soon as I can." Turning to the last remaining unbonded elves, he gestured for them to come closer.

"I would like for a friend or two to have a house elf, for various reasons. My younger self, Harry, doesn't need someone to cook or clean for him, but he needs a house elf that acts as a bodyguard and a chauffeur," he chuckled slightly. "In other words, he needs a house elf who can pop him around and protect him from bad wizards wanting to kill him. Do any of you think you'd like to work for him?" There were exchanged glances and hesitations before a small house elf stepped forward, almost as short as Skip but without her obvious young age.

"Radley is prepared to protect Harry Potter, Master," the male said in an unusually deep voice for a house elf.

"Thank you, Radley. Is it alright if you bind to Harry himself, or would you prefer me to bind you to the Potter family?"

The house elf hesitated briefly, then said, "Radley would be preferring to bind to Harry Potter. Master is not minding that Radley would not be answering to Master's calls?" he looked worried.

"Not at all, Radley!" Harry exclaimed, gesturing at all the other house elves with a broad motion. "Have you seen all these other house elves I can call on? No, I'll be happy to have you answer only to Harry; he needs the help, and I hope you'll serve him long and well."

"Radley will be doing his best, Master," Radley said, bowing deeply and shocked to find Harry mimicking the motion (which was decidedly awkward when crouching, he found).

"Alright, then I'll introduce you to him later today. Then, I'd like a house elf willing to serve a werewolf."

A collective shudder went through the small crowd, and Harry blinked. "Sorry, that might have been poorly phrased. I have a very good friend who's like a father to me. His name is Remus Lupin, and once a month he turns into a werewolf, though I assure you I'll ensure he gets the Wolfbane Potion every month from now on. He's very independent and doesn't really need a house elf, but I would like one willing to help him when he's weak before and after the full moon. If none of you are, don't feel like you have to volunteer because I'm asking for it."

There was a long silence as Harry let the elves consider it, seeing that the Black and Potter elves had understood that they were to consider it as well. Finally one of the unbonded elves stepped forward, trembling slightly but standing her ground.

"I will, Master Harry," she said, and though there was a slight tremor in her voice she looked at Harry resolutely, her gaze almost daring the wizard to doubt her.

"Wonderful," Harry surprised her by beaming at her in relief. "What's your name?"

"Fiona, Master Harry," the elf replied, and Harry looked his surprise at the unusually human name.

"That's a beautiful name, Fiona," he said honestly, and she blushed bright red. "I'll introduce you to Remus as soon as I can, and please remember that if you don't like working for him you can always come to me and I'll talk to him for you. He's an extremely gentle person, so I know he'd never hurt you, but if you don't like him as a Master but don't want to tell him so then just come to me, okay?"

Fiona looked completely taken aback at the offer of help to a house elf that wouldn't even be bound to him, but managed to nod her assent, stepping to the side with a deeply contemplative look that Harry had never seen on a house elf before.

Seeing that Skip was looking slightly afraid that she wouldn't get a family he beckoned her forward with a mischievous smile. "I have something very special for you, Skip," he said conspiratorially, and the girl immediately perked up.

"Yes, Master Harry?" she piped up excitedly.

"I have two very special friends," Harry began with a grin. "They're going to be leaving school soon to start up their own joke shop business, Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes, and they'll need a good house elf to remind them to eat as well as help them in the shop. They might want your help when creating jokes, too – at least, I'm sure that you can come up with a lot of ideas for them. What do you think?"

Skip was bouncing on the tips of her toes with excitement. "Skip is thinking it sounds very fun, Master Harry! Is Master Harry sure they will need Skip?" she asked, a little bit of uncertainty shining through her excitement, and Harry immediately reassured her that the Weasley twins were sure to need her help.

"I'll introduce you to them soon, and though I'm sure you won't have any issues you know you can come to me for anything, right?"

"Yes, Master Harry!" the house elf agreed immediately, bouncing off to the side with an exuberance that made Harry laugh.

"Let's see – staying on the topic of the Weasleys, I would like one of you to join the Weasley family. Mrs. Weasley loves to cook, so I'm not sure how much cooking there would be to do, but there's a messy house, plenty of older children, and an orchard complete with gnomes to deal with. Do you think that might interest you?" he asked a specific house elf he had left aside because something about the elf reminded him of Arthur Weasley. The elf immediately agreed, sheepishly confessing that he was a terrible cook, and Harry turned to the last remaining house elf. Before he could say anything, though, the elf spoke up.

"I'm too old to do much more than tidy up a bit, young wizard," the ancient elf said, giving him a shrewd look. "Somehow I do believe you knew that, however. Tell me, what were you thinking for me? Or did you plan on simply letting me go?"

"No, of course not," Harry replied immediately, now even more sure than before that his idea was a good one. "Have you heard of Hermione Granger?"

The old elf's gaze sharpened. "The Society for the Promotion of Elfish Welfare?" she snorted, and Harry grinned.

"Yeah, that one. She's slowly come to recognize that she wasn't going about it the right way with S.P.E.W., though, and I thought that you might be able to educate her on house elves, if that's alright with you." He only said that much, recognizing that this elf was possibly more educated than he was, and certainly much older. She didn't need persuading as the other elves had.

"It is not a poor idea," the elf admitted after a long silence in which she measured up Harry with her eyes. "I will accept a bond with Hermione Granger."

"Thank you, Madam..?"

"Kerrilee," the elf supplied with a small nod. "I look forward to meeting the young witch."

"I'm sure she will appreciate your age and experience," Harry returned in a similarly formal tone, inclining his head in turn. Standing, he moved to crouch before all the house elves once more. "I'm sorry that I can't organize all of you similarly," he said to the Potter and Black elves, "but please work together to take care of the properties I find myself owning. If someone is living in a property don't take care of it, and if any of you need help with anything please come to me, though preferably not when I'm in an important meeting or having sex," he grinned, somewhat surprised at how many elves blushed at his blunt words. Kerrilee merely snorted in amusement.

Checking his watch, he continued, "I'm afraid I have to get to the Ministry now, but I'll try to introduce you to your soon-to-be Masters soon, and arrange for uniforms for you all as well. I'm afraid it might take a while before you're all properly dressed, since the tailor will have to make quite a few outfits… Wait, let me count you so that I can tell her how many we need," he said, dashing to grab a piece of parchment and a pencil off Severus's desk before jotting down the number of male and female Potter and Black elves, as well as the gender of the other elves who would need other colors than those of the Black or Potter crests. That done, he folded the parchment and tucked it into a pocket, asking if there were any questions before he left. A chorus of "no"s returned and he couldn't help but smile, noticing that the headache he'd had in the beginning was long gone.

"Then I'll call you when I can," he nodded in the direction of the unbonded elves, "and now I really need to go. Thank you all for coming!" Knowing that in a moment they would all be popping out he stuffed his fingers in his ears, even so wincing at the tremendous crack. Shaking his head with a wry smile he hurried off to the Ministry for the next round of Death Eater trials.