22: The Conversation I Needed

After spending an entire night reading various books on history, general culture, and tales about the Dream Realm, Grey returned to his room to rest. However, slight dark circles had already appeared under his eyes, and his mind seemed exhausted at all times. Still, he couldn't fall asleep, not even trying.

"Ha, I might as well go for a walk. It was nice being under that tree; I should go again."

'And maybe I can learn more about those rumors… yes, about Sara.'

...

The leaves of the tree gently fell, carried by the wind blowing with some intensity in the morning. The sun shone high in the sky, and the green grass of the garden danced with the breeze, while the flowers swayed and their petals flew.

Grey lay under the shade of the tree on the small hill, his eyes open following the rhythmic movement of the branches. As he rested on the soft grass, he heard the silent footsteps of someone approaching from the foot of the hill.

He slowly sat up, looking towards the source of the footsteps. What he saw first was Sara's brown hair peeking over the slope, then her face, her shoulders, her hips, until he could finally see her whole body.

Several meters away from him, Sara raised her right hand and waved enthusiastically as she quickened her pace towards Grey.

'I was right; she was coming today too. That's good, yes.'

When she was close enough, she stopped and leaned slightly towards Grey, looking him directly in the eyes.

"Hi! Earth to Grey, why are you staring at me without saying anything? Were you waiting for me and now you can't even say hello?"

Grey tilted his head slightly, observing Sara's brown eyes, and replied:

"Hi, Sara." The corners of his lips lifted slightly before he continued with a playful tone. "Happy?"

She straightened up and looked at him with an expression of annoyance before sighing and sitting next to him. Then she turned her head towards him, waiting.

'Does she want me to speak? Come on, asking too much...'

Grey turned his gaze to her and finally broke the silence.

"So... are you going to tell me about those rumors you mentioned yesterday?"

Sara's eyes seemed to light up at Grey's words. She quickly stood up and sat in front of him.

"Yes, yes! Listen carefully, is it true that you defeated two powerful legacies? They say you managed to bring down Nephis of the Immortal Flame, who has a real name, and a guy named Caster, who was also very strong."

Grey looked at her with indifference and replied:

"Really? I suppose so. I was reading about the legacy clans in the library. Nephis is from a clan that no longer exists, right? And I didn't find anything about Caster in the Han Li clan."

Sara watched him with some doubt, confused by his indifferent way of mentioning such achievements. After a brief moment, she asked again:

"You read? But I didn't see you in the library yesterday..."

She paused before continuing:

"What are you hiding, Grey?" Her voice lowered a bit and her eyes narrowed.

'What does she mean?'

"Hiding? I was in the library throughout the night."

Sara stopped looking at him suspiciously, but her expression turned strange.

"Reading at night? Is that why you have those dark circles? You should sleep instead of reading like a fool."

"Like a fool? I don't know what that means, but I feel like it's not a good thing..."

"What? You don't know what 'fool' means?"

"No, I actually don't know many things. I don't remember who I was just before entering my nightmare."

Sara looked at him with barely concealed curiosity, her interest in him growing. A boy appears out of nowhere among the sleepers at the academy, with no background, who defeats the legacies, gets the highest score in the strength test, earns a real name in his first nightmare, and has no memories.

"You... don't know where you come from? Or what you did before? Maybe you're from a great clan and they are looking for you. Very few are as talented as you."

She paused before continuing, looking at Grey.

"Do you know who else has that kind of talent? Nephis of the Immortal Flame, daughter of one of the greatest legacy clans in history. She also got a real name in her first nightmare and is now called the Star of Change."

Grey felt confused and a bit nervous. His hands began to grip the grass without realizing it, and his body tensed slightly.

"Sara, I don't want you to talk about me before the nightmare. It makes me nervous."

She looked at him in silence for a while and, after a full minute, nodded.

"Alright, but first, can I know why...? I think you didn't notice, but your hands are gripping the grass tightly, and you tensed up suddenly."

Grey looked at his hands on the ground and noticed how he had dug his fingers into the soil. He felt his body rigid and his heartbeat accelerated.

'All this just from mentioning a past I don't remember...?'

Sara looked at him with some sympathy as he lifted a hand, noticing the mud left on his fingers.

"Alright, if you can't tell me, I won't ask any more. I won't force you."

Grey lowered his hand back to the ground, and slowly his body relaxed, feeling his heartbeat returning to normal.

"Thank you."

...

Sara looked at her communicator and widened her eyes slightly before turning her attention back to Grey.

"Oh, my fencing class is about to start. See you later, Grey. I'll come here tomorrow too. If you want to know more, you can ask me."

"Sure, see you later, Sara."

Suddenly, Grey stood still and looked at his own communicator.

"I forgot to have breakfast... again."

***

Since that day, Grey had stayed awake for an entire week. His body was becoming heavier, and the dark circles under his eyes were becoming more noticeable each passing day.

In the mornings, Sara worried about him and regularly asked if he was alright. Grey always simply answered that he was fine, and she didn't press further during the rest of the morning.

In survival classes, even Sunny asked about his condition. Professor Julius questioned him every day and warned him that he needed rest, but Grey remained stubborn and ignored the advice.

During combat classes, every time he trained with Nephis, she would often stop to watch him for a moment, at least until the day before when Grey had performed particularly poorly in his matches.

Nephis asked him why he avoided sleeping, knowing that was the issue because of the dark circles under Grey's silver eyes.

Similarly, he simply replied that he was fine and that she didn't need to worry.

But his problem was getting too severe.

***

On the morning of the eighth day, Grey found himself once again under the comforting tree on the hill, waiting for Sara to arrive to talk to her, as he did every day.

At least, it helped him to calm down and relax.

It wasn't long before he heard Sara's footsteps climbing the hill. He straightened up, leaning against the trunk of the tree.

"Good morning, Sara."

She approached with a worried expression on her face. She returned his greeting and sat beside him under the tree.

When she spoke, her voice had a soft tone, a mix of concern and compassion.

"Grey, the dark circles under your eyes... they're becoming more noticeable every day. Can't you tell me what's bothering you? I want to help you, Grey. At least, I want to try."

Grey looked her directly in the eyes, and the reflection of a pale boy with black hair looked back at him. Under his silver eyes, two dark spots seemed to deepen with each passing moment.

A longer than usual sigh escaped Grey's lips, he looked down at the ground and simply remained silent.

Sara took a moment before responding, carefully choosing her words. She knew this was serious, something that truly concerned Grey.

"Grey, defining a person, or even oneself, is complicated... but it can also be seen differently. Imagine that people, with their stories and lives, are like books that are continually written, changing with every second, with every decision we make."

She took a second to breathe and then continued.

"Maybe your book has lost some pages, but that same book keeps filling up with a new you, someone with their own tastes, thoughts, and desires. Something different from what was written before. Now you are a new version, a version of yourself, that isn't tied to the old... and that, Grey, is what you truly are."

Grey listened silently to Sara, his silver eyes fixed on hers, seeing himself through her reflection.

When he spoke, his voice was a little shaky, and uncertainty could be heard.

"A book... that keeps being written." He repeated, more to himself than to Sara. "It's a good way to look at it but... how can I be sure that this new 'me' is something good?... And if those lost pages had something really important, something I need to remember?"

He turned his gaze away from hers and looked up, watching the sky through the many green leaves falling from the tree.

"Sometimes, I have a feeling that I forgot something really important, something I should have remembered and something I need to find... Or someone."

His words came out faster than he planned, and when he realized his heart was pounding harder and faster, he looked at Sara's face, seeking some sign of understanding or comfort.

Sara smiled softly, not losing that touch of understanding in her gaze.

"Grey... I grew up in an orphanage. Just a few months ago, a category two nightmare door opened there. That day is still fresh in my memory... the day I lost everything."

Sara looked away for a moment, her expression turning more serious. Then she looked back at Grey with a firmer yet still compassionate voice.

"I could have saved my friends. I could have taken my best friend to safety with me... But when I saw those creatures coming out of the portal, I was scared. And I ran, Grey. I ran alone while they were left behind. Since then, I've been lost. With no place to return to, no friends, no family… with a weight of regret on me."

She took a moment before continuing, her eyes locked on Grey's.

"But do you know what I did with that regret the day I was infected? I decided that I would never leave anyone behind again. That I would never run from those creatures while someone was left behind. That desire, that promise, grew even stronger when I overcame my nightmare."

Grey continued to listen in silence, his thoughts tangled in a web of conflicting emotions.

"What I'm saying is that, no matter if your past was good or bad, even if you've lost your memories, it's you, the Grey of now, who decides what to do with that past. Only you can decide if you'll be better, if you'll change, or if you'll stay the same."

Sara looked directly into his eyes with a gentle yet determined smile.

"That's why you shouldn't worry so much about who you were before. The you of now can be someone completely new, and that depends on you. And if what you've lost is as important as you feel, if you truly need to find it… then sooner or later, you'll discover what it is."

She paused, letting her words sink in.

"So, don't torment yourself any longer, Grey. Allow yourself to rest, be the you of now, and face problems when they come."

Grey looked at Sara through the soft sunlight and the leaves falling from the tree as a gentle breeze carried the leaves high.

When he spoke, Grey's voice was low and halting, but it also sounded softer than a moment ago.

"I… I need to think about this, I'm sorry."

Sara gave him a soft smile.

"Don't apologize, I wanted to help you in the first place. You can talk to me whenever you need."

"Thank you," Grey said as he looked back at the sky and lay down on the cold grass.

...

Sara's communicator began to vibrate, and she held it up to her face. After reading the message, she leaned toward Grey, who was lying next to her, and spoke.

"Grey, my classes have started, and I'm going to be late, so I need to leave. You can call me if you need help with anything, okay?"

Grey turned his gaze to her and nodded.

As she left, a whisper reached his ears, a simple word:

"Thank you."

---

Well, we're finally nearing the end of this short and small volume. Should I focus more on action or continue at my own pace and give my characters some development? Or perhaps balance both? I think I did well, right? Action and development in this academy arc.