I Didn't Live Like That

Prep? Did Rodnir prepare him for this? Kanaru didn't know. Actually, he didn't hear Rodnir promising him anything about an inner court position. He answered, "Not at all. Rodnir once told me that getting into the harem court is easy, but entering the inner court takes skill. He didn't tell me anything about that, either. Most of our talks are about the world."

"You talk about the world with Rodnir?" Melaka hummed, Kanaru catching up on her disbelief. She just waved a hand to dismiss it. "Don't mind me. I just never caught him interested in other things but the crown. Not that he wanted it for himself, but the kind where he worried about the king a lot. After all, the political climate of Middlemist is especially polluted."

"Polluted? Does that mean a lot of other countries like to shoehorn themselves into Middlemist's business? I think that was how Rodnir once referred to it." Kanaru patted his chin as he thought out loud. "Not only the lesser countries, but even the big ones hoped for his attention."

Melaka chuckled as she sighed with a helpless smile. "It's natural for them to want it. His Majesty has always been the most powerful and the wealthiest. Without a queen, everyone just wanted to have a piece of him. However, he only gave it away to the lesser countries. The rich countries are barred from entering the harem court. They could only see His Majesty in galas he hadn't organized for a long time."

Whispers about galas did proliferate once. However, it had been more than ten years since the last one. As it stood, only those who could enter the Middlemist Palace could see the king. Kanaru hummed. "Does he dislike galas? My family couldn't hold galas anymore, but we held feasts every time there was a wedding among the servants. Does he dislike dancing and making merry?"

At those words, the two maidens glanced at Kanaru. Melaka answered with a smile. "Not really, but he thinks social gatherings are tiring and troublesome. He was expected to throw the most extravagant parties when His Majesty was content with simple ones. He would rather feed his resources to the people than waste them buying expensive and unnecessary things.

"However, as the highest king among all, he couldn't be too much of a cheapskate. In the end, he just stopped holding them officially. He just asked the people to organize parties on their own, and he would just pay for them." Melaka sighed. "That was what the royal adviser once said."

"Why, Kanaru? Do you think… we should hold a gathering to welcome the concubines?" Sierra picked up the courage to ask and keep her smile. However, Kanaru ended up looking at her with masked suspicion. It was not hostile, but he seemed bothered by talking to her.

As for Kanaru, he panicked at the question. He heard of how rich countries held their gatherings, and experiencing it once in Middlemist would be great. However, the king didn't like parties as he was forced to choke up more than he was willing to pay for. Middlemist was not lacking money, either.

He could only stare at Sierra and hoped she would recall her question. He didn't want to answer that.

"The air between you two is awfully suffocating. Stop forcing an interaction." Melaka laughed as she watched the two. "Sierra, if you're uncomfortable talking to him, stop doing it. You can move to my other side if you get repulsed by her, Kanaru. We don't mind."

"Repulse?" "But I must…" They answered at the same time, and they flinched just the same. 

Sierra just glanced at Kanaru before sighing. "Not to mention that I can feel him getting favored by His Majesty a lot… Kanaru is also a male. The inner court has been a safe space for females for a long time. I just don't feel comfortable sharing these spaces with a male now. I'm sorry…"

Melaka shook her head, but she patted Sierra's head afterward. "A lot of males within and without the king's palace kept bothering Sierra. She doesn't like seeing men where they shouldn't be. Did you notice that we haven't run into any guards, Kanaru? They are not allowed here without a need for their services. Even ministers shouldn't be caught going around for no reason."

"Uhm, I kind of understand. I'm not comfortable among women, either. The most I can talk to are those who are more like mothers caring for children." Kanaru chuckled as he wanted to shield his face. He might get hit if Natucha heard him imply that she was like their mother. "Talking to maidens outside my duties as a prince is not something I do."

"Oh? You don't speak to maidens in your country? Don't they come around you a lot since you're the prince?" Melaka lifted her brows, Sierra nodding as if asking the same thing.

"No, they're not allowed to be around me. I'm also raised not to interact with them." Kanaru wore a sheepish smile. "Growing up, I'm only allowed to speak to my mother. I don't have a wet nurse… so there couldn't be anyone else. All of my carers are males, and I was not allowed to get close to places where women work."

Sierra's intrigued eyes grew darker. "Please don't tell me it was because they thought of women lowly. Not letting their princes be tainted by the presence of women…"

Kanaru shook his head. "No, we don't live like that. It's more like I was not allowed to develop any feelings of familiarity toward them. I'm the third prince, and it's my duty to stay here in the harem court. My mother was attacked when she was carrying me. The operation to save me took away her womb. Without a female sibling, I have to be sent here to save our people."

The two maidens stopped walking, their faces paling up in horror. Kanaru noticed just as immediately, but he only chuckled. "Erm, you're reacting like how Eann did when he heard about this. Is it really that bad? I mean, I was restricted to do a lot of other things, but… we don't have any more feasible avenues to keep our people alive. It's the harem court or nothing at all."

"They didn't want you to develop feelings of attraction toward a female, so they alienated you," Melaka whispered, clearing her shock. "What an awful childhood. Don't you dislike your family, Kanaru?"

"Nope, I like my family. I'm just unlucky, but Covey and Mother are the most supportive." He smiled as he remembered the people he left at home. "Even if I was not allowed to be around women, they gave me freedom toward other things. I get to explore the forests around us and learn about a lot of things." 

Kanaru then giggled a little as he rubbed his neck. "Uhm, do you know? I taught Rodnir how to fish and hunt when we were traveling here. I didn't turn out that bad, I guess."