Let go

Jesse's POV

Everywhere was busy with dancers running in the dressing room changing into their costumes because we have just half an hour left before we will be on stage.  

I checked myself on the mirror and noticed I was indeed beautiful and everything was in place.  

I walk out of the dressing room and walk into the waiting room where others who had already dressed up was waiting.  

I took a seat and took in a deep breath, this was the biggest stage I have ever danced in my career and to crown it all I was the lead soloist.  

"We have only ten minutes remaining, everyone gets in line ".the dance instructor spoke up  

We all rushed to our line and stood there.  

"I believe you all know I'm into perfection and nothing but perfection, so you know what to do".he muttered out coldly.  

"Yes instructor".they all replied  

"Good, go in there and shine ".he muttered out as we are about to be called out on stage.  

I took in a deep breath closed my eyes and whispered encouraging words to myself.  

Lights are out as we entered the stage in a grand style  

We all stood in line as I came down from the center of the hall shining brightly with my makeup and consume.  

The music was put on ,and the song a thousand years started playing in the speaker.  

I took in a deep breath and started dancing, firstly I was tense seeing the thousands of crowds staring at me but the moment I started dancing all the tension in me disappeared, and I danced perfectly more than I expected.  

I could hear cheers and claps as I swing on the stage, I swing to the left and noticed the crowd standing for me with cameras beeping and people staring at me with wild eyes.  

Taking a glimpse of the people staring at me, I met eyes with Benson who has tears in his eyes while I saw Lilly shouting in amusement.  

I moved my gaze from him and swing to the right while I swing back to the middle and the dancers continued.  

We danced for a while before the first music was put to an end and another music started playing in the speaker.  

We danced to it until I took another solo  

I spin while using one of my legs  

I heard screams and shout of amusement as I spin around the hall until the music came to an end.  

We lower our head in respect and gratitude before leaving the stage.  

We went back to the dressing room and I could notice everyone was happy with the performance.  

"That was unreal".one of the dancers muttered out those words to me with a smile on her face  

"thank you"  

"Where did you learn that step from ?"one of the dancers asked  

I chuckled softly before speaking up  

"Let's say those are one of my special steps ".  

"Wow, I hope you teach us someday ".she replied before walking away.  

"That was incredible". I heard the dance instructor's voice behind me,  

"Thanks ". I turned and smiled at him,  

"I hope you consider your decision ". He muttered out those words almost like a plead.  

I chuckled softly and shake my head to him and was about saying something when I noticed my phone was ringing.  

I checked the caller and saw that it was Benson calling, seeing his call I remember he was here with Lilly and I find it strange.  

I pick up the call  

"Hello ". I muttered out  

"Hey I wanted to know when you are coming home ".he asked with a shaking voice  

"Why are you asking ?". I asked  

"Nothing actually, Lilly just wanted to know when you will be coming home.  

"Alright, in an hour time"  

"Okay, see you later".he muttered those words and ended the call.  

I stared at the phone shocked and wondered what was wrong with Benson and why he was acting this way.  

I kept back the phone, went to the dressing room and changed my clothes before leaving the hall.  

I took a taxi and went back home, when I got home I noticed no one was in the living room., I went to Lilly's room, but she wasn't there.  

Maybe she wasn't back with Benson.  

I walk up to Benson's room and opened the door, only to see that the lights were put off, but I could see candles and roses all over the room.  

I tried to put on the light, but Benson spoke up  

"Please don't put on the light ".he begged  

"Benson?". I asked shocked  

"Yes, it's me baby ".he murmured in tears  

"Baby ?". I murmured to myself,  

I walk into the room and noticed Benson's shadow knelling on the floor,  

"What is going on here ?". I spoke up while seizing my breath  

I noticed Benson took in a deep breath before he started talking  

"Jeez".he called out the pet name he gave to me for the first time since twelve years.  

I felt my heart clench and my palm became sweaty  

"I have no right to ask for your forgiveness, I have no right to knell before you and call out your name, I have no right to look into your eyes because I have deeply wronged you ".he murmured  

Hearing those words him I felt my heart beat pounding and my legs shaking in fear.  

For years, for twelve fucking years I have been waiting for a moment like this, a day like this when Benson will beg for my forgiveness, but I never knew it was this soon.  

"I was a fool jeez, a big fool never to noticed how much you loved me and how much you love me now ".he muttered out those words in a shattering voice then I knew he was crying  

"I loved you so much that I didn't want to see you with another man, I became so jealous and couldn't control my jealousy ".he murmured  

I stared at him with my heart beating in pain remembering all that I went through because of him.  

"I'm sorry Jesse so sorry, you can give me whatever punishment you want to give me but don't leave me, I won't be able to take it ".he muttered out in a serious voice.  

I took in a deep breath but didn't say a word. 

"Please Jesse, please find a place in your heart and forgive me, I was just stupid, so stupid that I couldn't see the handwriting on the wall ".he muttered out those words and stood up from the floor and walked over to me, but I stopped him  

"Stay back ". I muttered out in anger,  

"You are sorry, is that all you can say to me ?". I yelled in anger,  

"Do you know how much pain I went through just because of you ?". I asked in anger  

I looked for you, for twelve fucking years I looked for you, I lost my mind searching for you just to tell you I loved you and never cheated on you .but what did you do ?". I spoke in anger and pain,  

"After twelve years you came back and hurt me more ". I shake my head and wander in the room 

"I'm so sorry ". I did not let him finish when I cut him off,  

"Keep your apologies, I don't want them ". I declared in anger  

"I'm tired Benson, I'm really tired ". I murmured in tears  

"I'm tired of these pains, I'm tired of loving you, and you keep hurting me just because you know how much I love you " 

He shakes his head and moved closer to me, but I moved away from him 

"Stay away from me Benson, it's over Benson, everything is over". I declared seriously  

"No no no ".he fell on his knees and I noticed he was crying while he held my feet 

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry ".he begged in tears  

I closed my eyes and held back the tears threatening to fall down from my eyes and I move away from Benson 

I felt my heart pounding in pain, but I need to do what was right. 

"Benson". I slowly called out his name with pain in my heart,  

"I can't any more Benson, I can't keep loving you, I just can't Benson ". I took in a deep breath before speaking up  

"I'm letting go of you Benson, all the love I have for you, I'm letting it go ". I murmured in pain  

"No Jesse ".he begged and tried to hold my feet, but I moved away from him,  

"I have forgiven you Benson and I hope you find happiness ". I muttered out those words and went for the door when I heard a tiny little voice called out my name  

"Mama Jesse".she called out to me,  

I felt my feet glued to the floor and my heart beat increased as I felt her tiny hands on my waist while she hugs me from the back. 

I felt hot tears on my cheek as I turn back to face her  

I met eyes with her and could see her eyes soaked in tears  

"Papa told me he made you really angry".she murmured in tears.

Please forgive him and also forgive me ".she begged 

I shake my head and knelled down while I stroke her hair 

"You did nothing wrong my little princess"

"Then why are you leaving me, why do my moms keep leaving me ".she gulped in tears.

Seeing her this way I pulled her to myself and gave her a tight hug 

"I will never leave you Lilly, I will always be with you ". I whispered those words to her ear 

She left my embrace and stared at me with her two poppy eyes that I couldn't resist

"Does that mean you have also forgiven papa?".she asked with shaking voice 

I stared at her before locking eyes with Benson which cheeks were filled with tears.

I stared at him and realized I still love this man and I can never stop loving him.

I took in a deep breath and smiled at her 

"Yes dear, I've forgiven him " . I muttered out truthfully 

Hearing those words from me, Benson rushed to me and pulled me to himself and gave me a tight hug 

"Thank you Jess, I love you very much, and I promise never to make you go through any pain".he murmured in tears 

I sobbed in tears and pinch myself to make sure this was all real and indeed it was.

I love you, Benson". I murmured to his ears 

He kissed my cheek before kissing me softly on the lips 

"Yah". Lilly exclaims happily

"When are we having the wedding ?" She asked while staring at us with wild eyes 

"Very soon ". Benson muttered out those words while staring at me, 

He pulled me to himself and kissed my lips again 

"I love you so much, will you make me the happiest man on earth and walk down the aisle with me ?"he asked while staring at me with those two sets of greens eyes that I couldn't resist

"Yes, I will marry you this time for real ". I muttered out happily

He Chuckled softly and embrace me tightly

"But I have to still punish you for making me go through pains ". I murmured 

He Chuckled softly 

"No sex for three months". I muttered out playfully

He Chuckled softly before speaking up 

"Let's see if you can resist my charm ".he muttered out seriously with a big grin on his face

I roll my eyes playfully and look away 

And indeed he was right, I can never resist his charm because this man here is my soul mate.

The end 

author's note 

thanks for reading to the end,

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