Chapter 25: Drunkard

Chapter 25: Drunkard

"Jessy… what happened?"

I looked at the idiot king standing behind my bar a little annoyed but I got back to business. I wanted to ask more about this Queen Floor or whatever but it seems I'll have to keep that on the backshelf for now.

"Nothing happened, so how are you enjoying your stay? Did you still want to keep playing? Would you like some more Whitney?"

"Ah, I feel like throwing up."

No kidding, that bottle was full earlier. I was hoping to get the contracts signed by today but this can still work.

"Why don't we stop for now? I feel a bit tired, let's get you to your room. Why don't you stay in my bed tonight?"

"Jess brother, you're so kind to me. I wish my daughters were half as kind as you."

Oh? That's some interesting bit of information, "Really? I was actually rethinking your marriage proposal, but if you don't think I should…"

The idiot king panicked a little and responded quickly, "No! They're such great girls… it's just…"

"Just what? You can tell me, we're practically family at this point."

Yes, tell me. Tell me everything you have to say. Tell me all of your secrets. 

"Well, it's number 1. She's… ambitious. I can't do anything about it, she has the minister's ears. I need her out of the way… if you could truly do as Master Makoto said… I would understand that… Things happen."

Is he asking what I think he's asking? He wants me to kill his daughter? No, something is wrong. He's lying. 

"You. You're not really drunk, are you?" I looked at him and I realized something, he's a shit actor.

"How did you know?" 

The idiot king was no longer as wobbly or stupid. No, this was the look of a man who knew what he was doing. He wasn't drunk, he was just pretending to act like a fool this whole time.

"It was just a hunch, I figured you were acting far too stupid for your own good. Besides, I've been around enough drunks to know when a person is bullshitting. What, you thought this bar was for show?"

"Hahaha! I guess the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree. Your grandfather would never fall for such a petty trick. It seems Master Makoto was correct. You probably will become king someday."

I looked at him for a second and asked, "What did you do to the alcohol I gave you? You didn't waste it did you? That was my personal collection…"

The idiot king looked at me slightly confused until he understood the point, "Of course not, I just have a high tolerance for booze."

"Especially the expensive kind," I ripped the Hennesy out of hands and complained, "Do you have any idea how hard it was to make that? You just chugged it like water didn't you?"

I had to convince my grandfather for years to set up a distillery, that guy doesn't even drink. It's almost like he wants his country to do the same. Most of this is imported from other countries.

"Hahaha! That's what you get for trying to cheap out on our deal. You're far too naive, if you had taken that deal we would've killed her ourselves and put the blame on you." 

I cleaned the bottle while he was rambling on about having his daughter murdered… Maybe I should throw this thing away. I have a deadly fear of STDs.

"State your conditions already. What do you want?"

The idiot king was starting to get serious now, "We want our money you guys stole."

"Not going to happen."

Who does he think he is? What is he going to do with that? He needs more than money to win this war of his. As I was thinking this, the guy sat down on the couch and started to relax like he owned the place. 

"What about the serpent?"

"You want us to repel the empire, you think we can send troops to deal with both? Do you really think we would take such a deal?"

I walked over to my record player to play some music out of boredom, and to distract myself from dealing with this guy. 

"I've heard rumors that your grandfather was an otherworlder, the more I look around the more I start questioning the truth in that. Not like that changes anything. But it's true, I want a lot of things. Who doesn't?"

"If you want something in life you need to be willing to offer something in exchange. We're interested in exploring trade regarding tariffs and specific goods. I've heard about your country's expertise in producing sugar from syrup, rock salt from your mines, and tobacco. Let's talk about that."

"It's not tobacco, our seasons are too cold for that, they're called snow grass, they're more like a healing herb that you can smoke or put in food as a spice, but they look like tobacco. Name your price."

He seemed to calm down, but it seemed like things were going too smoothly. 

"We want you to only favor the Eastern Sea Company in any future deals, you will increase your market price by 30 fold and offer your goods to us at a discount."

King Del looked at me like I was crazy, "You can't be serious! We would lose all of our business partners, if we did that… forget about favoring, you would have a complete monopoly and you would ruin our reputation."

"You would get them back. Eventually… is this really the time to think over your options? Can Queen Floor help you?"

He looked at me in frustration, "We still have backup plans in case this deal fails… What about the girls? I know your culture doesn't believe in polygamy but even your king has a few concubines."

It's true he does, nobody talks about it often because they still admire the queen but she hasn't been seen in over 30 years. Some of the younger generation don't even know anything about her.

"I'm just not interested, it's not my thing."

King Del had his hands on his face, "What about the money?"

He's still on this? My grandfather only stole from a few people. It can't be that much can it?

"How much do you want?" When I looked at him it felt like some energy came back to him.

"In your currency we only need a fraction of what was… 'Acquired,' it should be around 900 thousand papers."

What?! He stole how much?! That's only a fraction too. 

I tried to keep my poker face but I had to ask, "His Majesty helped you tremendously, you know full well what would happen if your people remained unchecked. You would still ask for so much?"

"This is the minimum price we could ask for. Our people estimate that this is enough to arm our entire people and hire the best mercenaries, besides half of that money will go back to you."

Yes, and all we lose is manpower and resource. 

"How about this, we can't give you a penny but we can hold onto it for you. We will cover all of your expenses and hold onto the rest. We'll even invest it for you."

King Del looked at me in shock, "You would do that?"

This method has been done many times, even in my own world. Basically we stole it and we're going to steal even more once they start rebuilding. It sounds cruel, but it's actually pretty efficient. This method was used a lot in corrupt countries. 

"It's a win-win. You get all of your money back and we get to protect it. We can't very well allow the empire to take it all if you lose. That would just be stupid."

"So you want to own our country."

"For a time, what do you think your 'backup plans' can give you your money and protect it? I'm giving you the best deal you could ask for. I would also ask that you refrain from dealing with them henceforth."

He looked at me for a second, likely questioning if he should take the deal. There's not much he can do really, it's true we would own parts of his country but we would also help it rebuild. That includes cities, docks, villages, we would even dip our hands in the 'snow grass' trade for years to come. Obviously he could just call this off if he wins the war but… he wont. The deal is just too sweet to turn down.

Never mind 900k he would most likely get triple that, the only downside is that we decide where that money goes, and it can be anything. From the black market to helping the empire invade. That may sound silly but it's not that far fetched to build a couple dozen bridges across his lands and we get a whole %80. The problem is that I won't get that %80. 

"Also, if that doesn't wet your appetite."

I sent an invite to him using my skill.

"What is this?" The king looked startled over the uncalled status screen.

"This is my unique skill. It will allow us to trade with each other through vast distances. You can even trade with others on any public auctions I might host. Of course I'll get the first bid if I find anything I like."

The king looked at me surprised, I guess he wasn't expecting this, "It will drastically reduce travel cost and guarantee the safety of all available goods. I plan to stretch this offer to many, but for now I'm offering you this deal in good graces."

"I'll admit I'm surprised. I didn't think you would offer such a deal, it's true we may lose a lot including our freedom but it's still better than the alternative. Please give me time to talk to my contacts."

I'm not surprised, everything I've offered him is basically slavery without the ball and chain. Sort of like marriage back on earth…

"Think it over, it's the best option anyone can give you right now."

He was about to walk upstairs until number 1 stormed down here looking for him.

"Father! You didn't make any deals with him did you?!"

"Drop the act, the idiot king and the ambitious princess show did not work on him."

The princess looked back and forth between us and interrupted, "It's not that! That man sexually assaulted me. We can't trust him."

I forgot about that.