Caleb Keller-Wilber

Caleb's point of view

"what do you mean you need to talk to someone?" Dad asked right after I told them I needed help. telling them that Alone took alot out of me and now he wanted me to explain it to him... It was going to be hard but I was already through the door and I needed to keep walking.

"it's... I haven't really been doing good... it's hard...." I trail off and I can't find the words to explain myself. they say nothing, the guide me until we're sitting on the couch, papi on my right and dad on my left.

"it's okay Caleb... take your time, I'll listen to whatever you have to say, no matter how it sounds" Papi reassured me, patting my head.

I take a deep breath and let the first words that come to mind Tumble out. "it's mom"

"di.. did Marge call you?!" Dad asked, his voice furious.

"no" how was I going to explain this. "it's not really mom, it's more me... I've been having a hard time because of what happened with mom.. the whole separation thing" I drop my head into my hands and cover my face. "I thought I was over it but I'm not... I don't... " dad saves me from having to explain anything more.

"it's okay..." he whispers and let's out a soft sigh. "you don't need to explain it to me but I think we should get you... we know a therapist, our friend, Paul, from upstate, how about we drive you to his office in the morning so you can talk about it more with him"

"okay" I mutter. I suddenly felt guilty for keeping secrets from them. "but can I tell you about something?"

"yeah, sure, we'll Listening to whatever you have to say" Papi say and leans into me. my body calms.

for the next ten minutes, I tell them about the game and how it's not just a game anymore. I tell them how it started, I tell them about the terrible dates and the fun dates, I tell them about Xavier and how he made me feel. but the hardest part was telling them about Sophie... I still couldn't wrap my head around the whole thing and I could see that they couldn't either.

"wait... wait... All this happened last month?" I nod quickly. "and we had no idea about it... wait, sweetie, did you?"

"no" Papi said. he inhales deeply and stands up from his seat. "first things first, Sophie isn't allowed in this house until I understand what the fuck she was trying to do with the shit she said to you" he starts pacing then. "you know what, I understand exactly what the fuck she was trying to do but that is a shitty thing to do to my kid... to any one" he was raging and I've never seen him this way before. "she knows you, she knows everything you've been through and how strong and special you are, yet she still pulled this crap.

"Caleb, my star... I need you to understand that no one can ever take you away from us or even your siblings and if they ever fucking try it, I will make them regret it" hes back at my side when he's done raging and he wraps his arms around my shoulder. "okay?" he asks.

"okay" I mutter and pull him into a hug. I heard what he said but my head and my heart aren't getting it. I was still scared. "yeah... I'd like to see the therapist tomorrow" I finally said.

"okay, tommorow morning, you'll skip school and go see Paul" dad's voice is gravelly as he speaks and I know he's going to cry, he let's out a soft sigh. "and I know I said that you're old enough to have your own secrets and god knows you are but... if your secrets are hurting you, baby –like this one has – I'm gonna need you to tell us, I'm gonna need you to let us help"

"we love you and we want you to be happy, it's our job to make sure you're happy and safe and loved... please, Caleb... let us help" Papi is already crying and my heart breaks.

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to make you cry, Papi... please don— "

"okay, I won't cry, I know you hate seeing people crying" he wipes his eyes and smiles at me. "I love you so much, Caleb... you and your dad and your siblings, you're everything to me"

"I love you too" I tell them both .

"and I love you sooooooo much pooky bear" Luka jumps on top of me from behind the couch and wraps his arms around me.

"uhm... how long have you been Eve's dropping on our conversation?" Dad asks him

"oh... I'm Eve's dropping on pretty much every conversation" he says and cuddles deeper into me. "you know I totally called it, Sophie is a fucking creep"

"Luka!!!" Papi screams at him.

"hey, I'm just being honest... also, another thing...." he let's go of me and takes a step back and I know he's done something.

"what did you do?" I ask him, trying to keep the laughter away from my voice.

"well, I may or may not have order a bunch of techy shit that may or may not have cost about... " he mutters the amount and starts to back away.

"how much money did you spend and who did you charge it to?" Dad asked and stands up. "Luka??"

"Papi's and it's about three" he says and grabs his bag and runs for the door. "I've got to go, I have a date with my friend Vincent... I've asked for permission already, so bye!!"

"wait, a date with who now?!!" Papi screams at him as he runs out. papi pulls out his phone and starts scrolling through. "oh my god!!"

"what?" both me and Dad asked at the same time.

"he spent three thousand dollars on tech!!!" Papi screams so loudly that he shocks the shit out of both of us. "on 'techy shit'!!"

"oh, Luka is so dead" dad tells me and elbows me softly, laughing quietly. I join him, hand over my mouth and stop instantly when dad glares at us.

Dads took me to doctor Paul Weston's office in the morning and I had my first appointment with him. Paul was really nice and he was very talkative, he talked about his six cats and then his husband, he never stopped talking and it's was kind of nice how he smiled whenever he spoke about his son, Daniel. he told me how Daniel liked make up and how pretty he was and how his birth family never accepted him.

then all of a sudden he asks "what do you remember of your mother?"

"uhm... I remember... uhm—"

"Caleb, I want you to tell me what she was like before the incident" he asks me softly, his head leaning to the side.

"uhm... I remember her garden" I start. "I remember that she had these pretty red flowers... she used to make tea with them... she'd take me to the gardening store a few miles from our house back in brightfalls and she'd let me pick whatever plant I wanted to and we'd put them in these little planters and see if they'd grow"

"so, they were good... your memories of her?"

"yeah, for the most part but it kind of got bad at the end, when they were always fighting and always being shitty towards each other... she changed" I told him all about mom.

the session with doctor Paul was kind of freeing, being able to talk mom with someone else made me feel better. Dad always treated mom like a sore subject and I know what she did was horrible but I could never really stop loving the mother who would sing me to sleep and the mother who showed me how to weed flower beds... it was hard to stop loving her.

on the drive back, I decided I needed to start working one what I promised Xavier. even though I wasn't with him anymore, I needed to try to come out, I needed to try my hardest not to just come out as queer but to come out as a person because most of the school doesn't really know me, even Sophie didn't and I think it's time I changed that.

"hey dads" I call out to them from the back seat.

"yeah, sweetie" Dad answers.

"I kind of need you help with something" I say softly.

"what is it?"

Xavier's point of view.

the great start to my week ended Tuesday morning when I walk into class and see Caleb Keller seating at the back of the class. he doesn't say anything, he doesn't even wave, he just gives me a small smile and looks away.

tears bloomed in my eyes and I need to leave but I couldn't because Mr. Hansel walks into class and starts to take attendance.

"Avery Winston" he calls.

"here" Avery says.

"Makayla Applebottom"

"here"

he kept calling names and I zone out, trying so fucking hard not to burst into tears.

I'm shocked out of my when my name is screamed across the room "Xavier Castor!!"

"here!" I say when I'm shocked out of my trance. "sorry" I duck my head as I see all eyes are on me.

but soon their attention turns elsewhere when Mr. Hansel calls out the next name. "Caleb Keller-Wilber" he says.

"here" Caleb answers.

"since when is your last name Keller-Wilber" he asks, frowning at the attendance sheet.

"I had it changed yesterday but it's always be that way" Caleb replies.

"really? your dad and mom have their names hyphenated?" he asks, completely ignoring his job of taking attendance.

"yes, both my dads liked the idea of having there last name hyphenated, I had mine changed a long time ago"

"dads?"

"yes" he sounded nice but Anyone who was really listening – basically everyone – could hear the challenge in his tone.

Mr Hansel clears his throat and continues reading out his attendance.

I look over at Caleb and he's looking at me with a smile on his face. I look away from him quickly. I hated him right now but I couldn't fight the bloom of pride in my chest.

God, I was so fucking gone for him.