No Longer Yours

The day I left that house was the day I gave up all hope. To think that I gave you all I had and you still left makes me furious. You took my unborn child and didn't even think twice about it. But I can't lie, I miss you like crazy. I miss you so much that it pisses me off.

I thought that I had finally found a woman who could handle my life style but I corrupted another good one, I was selfish and knew that bringing you into this gang would bite me in the ass but I didn't care. All I wanted was you, no matter what happened.

I miss the way you'd scold me for being a smartass, the way your hair would shine when it was wet, the cute little mole on your thigh, or how you'd always have to have the last word. Fuck Kaz, why'd you have to go?

"Hey, wake up man."

He slowly rolls out of bed and rubs his eyes,

"Maldición, ¿qué hora es?"

(Damn, what time is it?)

"Almost time for our meeting, we leave in an hour so get ready."

"Mhm..."

He staggers over to his walk-in closet. I can hear him tossing clothes and mumbling under his breath, "You know this is an important meeting? That means no casual clothes."

"Yeah I know. Only business suits and talking to snobby, uptight, bitchy-"

"Carlos."

"Sorry but you know how I feel about these kinds of things."

"Dude relax, it'll be the last one for a while."

"Yor for real?"

I nod,

"Fine, i'll get ready."

I leave his room so he can get dressed,

"Mueve tu culo Carlos, no quiero llegar tarde."

(Move your ass Carlos, I don't want to be late)

***

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Now, you all know that I absolutely hate these meetings so i'll get straight to the point; I Ricardo Ramirez-Hernandez will be leaving HT."

The room instantly is filled with whispers and murmurs. I clear my throat and they quiet down.

"I will be taking some time off and leaving my closest friend, Antonio De'Carlos Garcia Chavez-Martinez Jr. temporary head of Hernandez Trading."

I glance over at him and see that his jaw is hanging open,

"Now if you'll excuse me, i'm done here."

*Outside in the parking garage*

"Hey mane, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"Leaving."

"Ok but where you going?"

"I don't know, I just can't be here."

"Ricky, you're not making any sense. We just moved in to that giant ass house and now you wanna leave? I- I don't understand."

"You don't have to, i'm leavening so you'll be in charge of running HT."

"Woah, I don't know about that, I just drop by the-"

"No, you're the only person I trust so that makes you my first choice."

"Is it because of her? Is that why you're doing this?"

"..."

I don't respond back.

"What a fucking pussy!"

"Aye, cuida tu maldita boca."

(Aye, watch your damn mouth)

"And if I don't?"

"Listen, I gotta be somewhere so i'm not doing this right now."

"Fine then, run off and leave."

"What the hell are you talking about, eh?"

"Oh don't give me that shit, we both know that i'm only stepping up because you wanna puss out and do what Kaz did. You wanna run away from your problems and expect them to solve themselves! Well let me tell you something chico, you won't fix shit gone."

"Don't you fucking dare give me that shit Carlos. Do not compare me to her! I didn't lie and sneak out when no one expected it and you can bet your fucking ass that i'll be back!"

"How do you know she won't be back?!"

"Because I know Kaz!"

I take a breath and calm down,

"Look man, you know how she is, you knew her too. She won't be back."

"She will be back. She would never just abandon us, we're her family!"

"No we're not Carlos! She has a real family and just because you don't wanna accept that doesn't make it any less true."

"Fine...you wanna leave then leave, but don't think twice about coming back here."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. If you wanna leave me here to run your gotdamn company, then don't bother coming back."

"How fucking dare you? I'm the one that let you into Arañas Rojas! I made you!"

"You? Made me? Listen, i'm done fighting you on this so just get your shit and leave."

He opens his car door but before he gets in, he stops and looks at me,

"But I mean what I said Ricardo, you leave now and you won't be welcome back."

'He never calls me by my real name. He's serious.'

"What makes her so special? Why does she get a pass but I don't?"

"Don't give me that shit mane. You can't even try to understand the shit that woman has gone through. Not even for a second. She deserves to take some time off and get herself together, you ain't got shit on her."

I walk over and slam his door shut. He moves his hand just fast enough so it doesn't get caught in the door,

"You think i've had it easy? You don't think I need time off too? She didn't just leave Antonio, she took my child, called off our wedding..."

My voice cracks.

"She took my will to live, she was my the air in my fucking lungs. How would you know what it feels like to almost have the perfect life, but have it so cruelly snatched away? You may be my brother but you don't know a damn thing about me."

He sucks his teeth,

"I know you like the back of my hand Ricky. That's how I know you'll be back. You can go as far as you want but I know you'll show back up, your a Arañas Roja, it's in your blood to come home."

"But you said-"

"I know what I said. I just didn't know how determined you were, I just had to see."

"So, hypothetically, if I were to come back i'd be welcome?"

He opens his car back up and gets in,

"I stand by my word Ricky, it's all up to you."

'Up to me huh?'

I hold out my hand and he shakes it,

"So long brother."

"Goodbye chico, may we meet again."