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New And Improved Harry Potter

When a wonky potion wipes Harry's memory, he turns into a sly and clever dude. Forget his old self – now he's all about outsmarting everyone and shaking things up. With his wits sharp, he's not playing by the rules anymore. Harry's newfound attitude shakes up the school as he refuses to be controlled. Expect plenty of foul language, a touch of character criticism, and loads of sci-fi nods. Harry's not just any wizard—he's a bit of a jerk. Get ready for a wild ride as Harry spins his own story, outthinking folks left and right. ====== Disclaimer I do not assert any ownership over anything. J. K. Rowling owns everything.

Earthly_Writer · หนังสือและวรรณกรรม
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125 Chs

Defiance and Departure

"You can't threaten me," Malfoy sneered as he waved his henchmen forward, causing the girls to point their wands at one each with a spell on their lips.

"Now, now, ladies, gentlemen, I am sure you are not fighting," the Headmaster said as he and Snape rounded the corner. They came to a halt when they were by Slytherins' side. The old man looked over the group with a great deal of grandfatherly disappointment showing in his face and eyes.

Snape on the other hand, was glaring at all of them, Draco and his goons, because they got caught, and the others on principle.

"Of course not, sir," Malfoy stated as he stepped away from Potter with a wary, yet calculating, look in his eyes.

"Bugger off, old man, this is between me and the ponce," the messy-haired amnesiac snarled, his eyes never leaving the blond in front of him.

"Potter, you will show the Headmaster some respect," snapped Snape and was about to say more, when he saw a glimpse of the Baron out of the corner of his eye. Cursing his luck, he settled back down.

"Woah, aren't you an ugly duck," Harry said, when he looked to see who was talking, making the man step forward with his hands out, like he was going to strangle the boy. "Ever hear of shampoo? I'm not sure if it will turn you into a swan, but it can't hurt," he added with a shrug. There was something about this man that said to keep an eye on him. And yeah, he probably shouldn't provoke him, but really, that hair. "Hermione's parents are dentist, maybe you should give them a call. I mean, your teeth look like you eat metal," he finished as he looked the man up and down.

"Why you…" was all Snape got out when the Bloody Baron drifted in front of him.

"Potion Master Snape, control yourself," he barked with a threatening look in his eyes, and then turned. "I heard you were looking for me, Headmaster," he said pompously, though he was fuming at the Potions Master's lack of restraint.

He knew he was going to have to tell the old man what was happening if the out-of-control teacher didn't get his act straight soon. Now he just had to figure out how in a very Slytherin way.

Harry's jaw fell when the ghost came into view. It niggled something in the back of his mind, but he couldn't quite reach it, so he shrugged it off for the moment and stared at the very realistic hologram.

He looked around to see if there were any projectors, but didn't see any. Maybe, just maybe, there might be some truth to this whole 'magic' thing. He'd have to ask Luna, but for now, he needed to pay attention to what was going on in front of him.

"Ah, yes, it is a blissful circumstance that we four are all here together," the old man said happily as he looked at the three he wanted to talk to, and all but clapping his hands in good cheer. "Mr. Malfoy, you and your companions may leave," Albus said as he made a shooing motion to the fourth year Slytherins. "Miss Granger, Miss Lovegood, you may depart as well."

"The girls are bloody well staying with me, arsehole. I'm not letting myself be alone with some mind-rapist," Harry snarled as he backed up to where his… friends… were standing.

"Harry? Are you sure?" Hermione asked, torn between obeying the Headmaster and standing by her friend. She looked back on what had happened to Harry since his return and then nodded her head and stood her ground.

Luna never said a word, nor did she drop her wand.

"Very well," Dumbledore sighed, and then turned to the other students. "Mr. Malfoy," was all he said.

"Yes, Headmaster," Draco grumbled as he jerked his head at Crabbe and Goyle, and they left. He really wanted to know what Potter meant. It would be wonderful blackmail material on the old coot. He was going to duck in a nearby classroom, but then he couldn't hear anything behind him, privacy wards must have been put up, so he simply continued on.

"Now, there seems to be some confusion," the old man stated as he looked over at Harry, then to Severus, and last at Damien. "When Minerva found Harry, he told her that he ran because a dark-haired, long-nosed man threatened him. The boy also said that there was a… hologram of a man in bloody robes. Now I can only reason that he meant you two," he finished as he looked over his half-moon glasses at Snape and the Baron.

"I did see a child in Gryffindor robes, in the dungeons on All Hollows Eve," the Baron confessed truthfully.

"Why ever did you not tell me?" the Headmaster asked, appearing disappointed. The ghosts were supposed to notify him of everything that went on in the castle. How else was he supposed to know what was going on? His information network of ghosts and portraits kept him well informed.

"Headmaster, there are always children from other Houses wandering the dungeons on that night. It is some sort of rite of passage," Damien said, which was true… about fifty years ago.

"Ah yes, I do remember something about that in my younger years. Very well, what did you do when you saw Harry? And what was he doing?" the old man asked as he stroked his beard in thought.

"Why, I informed the Potions Master, of course," the ghost stated as if it were obvious. "However, the last I saw of the child, he was running, so it is plausible that they never connected." Once again completely true.

"Very well," Albus sighed again, this was not going as he wanted. "Severus?" he turned his inquiring eyes to his… protégé, which was the only polite term he could think of for the man. Everyone else insisted on call Severus his 'pet Death Eater.'

"I did not see the bra… young man after we left the antechamber," the man boldfaced lied, fuming that the dratted ghost would put him in such a position, and at the same time applauding the very Slytherin move.

"Harry, my boy…."

"I Am Not Your Fucking Boy!" Harry snarled as he poked his finger in the hated man's direction. "I note that you call everyone else by their last name. You will do the same with me or we will have further issues," he said pretentiously. There was no way he was ever going to make it easy for this old man. He was going to do everything he could to make it difficult for him.

"Yes, well, can you tell me what you remember?" the old man asked, trying to catch the boy's eyes.

"Are you the police?" our hero asked, folding his arms in an 'I know you're not, and I'm going to be stubborn' way.

"No, I am not part of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. I am however the head of the Wizengamot, which a body that makes, and tries those that break the laws," Dumbledore stated importantly.

"So you're like the head judge?" Harry asked with a smirk.

"Well, yes," was the answer.

"Now, I don't know nothing about this 'wizarding world', but I do know that in the real world, judges don't investigate crimes. So, if you want answers from me, get a copper here," the messy-haired amnesic stated firmly. "Oh, and I want an attorney," he added. "I do know that that is within my non-existent rights."

"That may be true in the Muggle world, however you are not there," Dumbledore said smugly.

"Then I'll bloody well leave. You can't hold me here forever, you old bastard," Harry snarled as he whirled around and started down the hall. "Come on, girls, let's eat, I'm starved."

.....

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