Sh*t Is The Right Word

Gram had begged George not to do anything to Johnny because she didn't want anyone to know what happened at the New year's party. She was ashamed that she had put herself in a such a situation in the first place. She had felt in her gut something was off about that night long before she attended. She was angry with George for not watching her closely and at Johnny for taking advantage, but more so she was angry with herself for not being careful and not listening to gut instincts. In her mind there was no one else to blame but herself.

George didn't see it that way. He was angry at himself for listening to his friend and not making sure she was home safe before he left. He also felt that Johnny deserved to go to jail for what happened because he was certain he drugged her. He wanted to beat the guy to death too, but since Gram insisted on keeping things quiet, he did nothing. He suppressed his anger for her sake and kept her secret. He kept her at his brother's house for the remainder of the holiday weekend so she could fully recover before facing her parents. The fact that her parents trusted him and his brother so much was a convenient blessing for such a situation.

Once the holiday break ended and George returned to school, Gram returned to her babysitting routine without giving New Year's another thought. In fact, she gave no thought to much of anything. She had lost the glimmer of life she once had in her eyes. A wave of depression had taken root and sucked the joy and passion she once had out of her heart. She went through the motions of life without any zeal for any of it. Weeks passed as she numbly existed within her routine.

Her father was the first to mention the change in her countenance. He came to her one afternoon while she was playing with Melissa in the front room. "Hey Gerts. You got a minute? Mom will watch Melissa." He gestured towards his office to indicate his seriousness. She quietly followed him once her mother entered the room to play with the baby. He closed the door behind them and ask to have a seat on the sofa. He sat next to her and took her hand. Looking at her with pleading eyes he asked, "What's wrong Gerts?"

She dropped her eyes to the floor and pulled her hands from him. "N-nothing, Papi. I'm okay. I've just been tired lately."

"Bullsh*t!"

"Papi!" She looked at him slack jawed, shocked at his word of choice. He'd never cussed before.

"You heard me. I said, bullsh*t. I know you, baby and this…" he waved his hands in front of her, "this is not you just being tired. You've been like this for weeks, so I know you're hurting. What I want is for you to tell me why."

She swallowed the lump in her throat refusing to answer her father. She simply shook her head and cast her eyes back on the floor. She couldn't tell him. He would hate her for sure. She's the daughter of a pastor. What would the people in the church say? Wouldn't they assume he failed in parenting her properly? Wouldn't they look at her like a Jezzabel?

"Was it George?"

Shock raced through brain again at his words. "What?! No! George didn't…" she sucked a breath to calm her nerves. "He would never hurt me." She directed her attention to the wall opposite her position and stared at the photos on the wall. How she longed for those simple days of yesteryear. She tried to drown out her thoughts by staring at the pictures of her childhood that grace the walls of her father's study. Anyone that came in this room could see how much he loved his family. If only all men were like her father. Then she wouldn't have experienced being robbed of all her firsts. A tear betrayed her by dancing down her cheek only to land on her father's hand as he caressed her face.

"Then who did this to you?" He said calmly.

She shook head again before burying it in the crook of his neck. "I'm sorry Papi. I- I…" she choked on her words.

"The New Year's party." Her dad said knowingly. She nodded. "But not George?" She shook her head 'no'. "But he promised to look after you. To protect you."

"Please don't be mad at him, Papi. He didn't do anything wrong."

"He didn't do anything right, either since you've been hurt! I know you've been hurt. Now tell me what happened and who did it."

"Please, Papi."

"Tell me or will hold George responsible for my worst assumptions and punish you both accordingly." He threatened.

"No! Papi, please. I beg. George didn't do anything! He would never… I wouldn't even let him avenge me. Please don't hold him responsible." She begged but the look in his eyes told her he was serious. Only the truth would save her friend from his wrath. She relented and confessed. "It was Johnny Hipkins. I don't really know remember what happened, but I think he drugged my water and had sex with me." Her dad's face reddened with rage. "George didn't know about it until the next morning." She held both his arms to keep him seated. "He was told that I had gone home so he didn't know I was still there. He said he came by here that morning and when he found out I wasn't home he went back to Johnny's and found me in his bed. I swear I don't remember anything."

"Why didn't you come right away and say something?!" He growled. "Why didn't he tell us anything?"

"I begged him not to. Please, Papi… I was too ashamed to say anything. I just wanted to forget all about it." She sobbed into her hands as he rose to his feet. His fists shaking at his side displaying the rage of father.

"That boy should be in jail!" he stomped over to his and picked up the phone.

Gram ran to him, pressing down the button on the phone. "Papi, don't. Please, I beg you."

"What he did is illegal!!"

"Agreed, but his dad is also the mayor. And you and I both know it'll be a case of 'he said - she said' and I'd come out looking like a girl looking for hush money. You know I'm right."

He sighed, gazing at her regretfully. He set the phone back in its cradle and hugged her as if she were his oxygen. "I'm sorry, baby girl. I'm so sorry you've gone through such a thing."

She hugged him back and the two dampened each other's shoulders with tears for several minutes. Gram was the first to pull away and wipe the tears from her father's face. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you or Mom. I just felt so… so… dirty. I just couldn't. I was so sure you would hate me."

"We could never hate you, Gerts. Even if you turned into the most promiscuous girl in town on purpose." He chuckled. "Of course, I'd correct such behavior as I would condone that type of lifestyle, but I would still love you. You are my daughter, and I will love you unconditionally for as long as I have breath." He hugged her again releasing the rest of his tears. After a moment or two he shocked her again with his words. "Are you pregnant now?"

She pulled away from with wide eyes and a slack jaw. "P-pregnant?! No! I can't be." Her mind raced through the days and the weeks since her last period, quickly calculating where she was in her cycle. "What's today? I was due the eleventh."

He frowned. "It's the nineteenth, Gerts."

"Sh*t!" She cussed before realizing she was still in front of her father. "Sorry, Papi. I mean…"

"I think 'sh*t' is the right word for this." He interrupted with a heavy sigh. "We'll talk to Mom after Missy goes home."

"Tristan is working overnights this week."

"Okay, so after bedtime then."

"Okay." She wasn't looking forward to involving her mother, but at the same time she felt better knowing her dad was on her side.