chapter 1 - the meetup

to us who have not found a home yeet.

✧chapter 1✧

when I was eight I was adopted, but not by a man and woman, but a son who lacked a friend. in the adoption center the parents stood in the corner and didn't care. the boy was not not. he looked around at the mass of children playing, the children did not think about him or look at him. I sat out to the side at one of the wooden tables, staring at him curiously. when he came over to me and promised a home and a friend, everything started to fall into place.

I step out of the taxi, excited but also nervous about having to turn to something new again. this time I just know what I'm getting into. the childhood home looks like itself, but it has been moved around a bit. the lawn is freshly cut and smells of fresh grass, and there are no more toys or a swing set in the garden. sheng li stands in the doorway and I carefully take my suitcase, pay the taxi driver and go through the door. "hello" I say shyly, not quite knowing what to say to someone you haven't seen in 2 years.

"Welcome" Sheng li says, clearly also unsure of what to do, his voice darker but not unrecognizable. "Let me take it" I hand him the suitcase and he goes into the house.

I'm following along.

Everything has been refined in a way that screams 'Sheng Li', the first thing you enter is the dining room, where we usually eat meals. However, some chairs have been taken away as there are no four of us anymore, but only 2. sheng li quickly leaves me with the suitcase rolling behind, the kitchen next to the dining room looks like itself. something louder somewhere in the house, so I follow the sound, past a shiny gray sofa and the big TV. eventually I end up at my old room. through the doorway I can see sheng li standing bent over by my bed over my suitcase, it sounds like the one he's baking with, from the frustrated sounds he makes. Sheng li has always been frustrated quickly.

I go over to help "you need a code" I show where the code box is on the page.

"When there's a reason" he says and scratches his forehead.

I enter 1717 and a small click sounds. "like this" I say and open the suitcase. sheng li stands a bit and watches.

"you don't need to help me, I can easily handle myself" I say as the atmosphere is getting awkward. he lets out a small light laugh and says "yes it could be, but not two years ago...it's going to take some time to get to know each other again"

I nod with a smile, "yes, you're right", the suitcase is opened and a multitude of books, sketchbooks, pencils and a few clothes piled down come out. "Forget what I said, it looks like you're exactly the same " we both laugh and a few tears fall too. his hair has become marks, taller, and his eyes lively gray, yet he is the same.

I hope.

"I have to be honest to say that I've missed you" my gaze falls on the floor embarrassingly aware of what I just said. that he hasn't been there has given a special kind of emptiness that couldn't be filled with school, parties and lying in bed scrolling through old messages and pictures. sheng li approaches and squeezes me into a brotherly hug, he smells like licorice. as quietly as possible I breathe in his scent, wishing it would rub off on me forever.

"I've really missed you" I say again, almost like a whisper and he says

"I've missed you too". A big smile struggles forward, grateful to have a place to go, a door that is always closed and open arms.

I'm not the same anymore and neither is he, and yet it does not feel like we have been away from each other for 2 years.