Chapter 07 - A new start

To be honest I'm pretty glad that this nonsense started to make sense. I really wanted to believe Dr. Taemin, I tried. It's just that, it's too real, too connected. I did feel that similarity every time I dreamt. Like I knew what it felt like to personally experience that memory. It was too weird to believe so I always considered Sun-Hee as…. well… not me. I remember Dan-Oh really well. When she was Jiao-Jiao.

Following me everywhere in the palace gardens making fun of the guards and their stiff armor. Criticizing my dad, the emperor. As far as I remember she never took a fancy to anyone, not even to my brother. Maybe it's because she never had the time to hang around with other men or go out to eat at the stalls. Not even I had time. No not time, it was… I never had permission. My entire job was to greet this minister and that minister. Pour tea, smile. Everything was so mechanical.

But now I'm here, no bonds holding me back. I can paint, sing, dance, and walk around till late night. Looking back at my past, I have more freedom and I'm happy that I have it. It's only now that I know the value of freedom and I'm not going to waste it. I may even have a chance with Jae-Sung. But….. something was off about him. Cold and distant.

Eh, maybe it's because I'm just a stranger right now, stupid, I thought. Of course he won't be so bright and open to someone he just met. And now he thinks I'm crazy.

It was a bright Monday morning and I was practically dozing off during history of arts. Mr. Jin was babbling in his boring monotonous voice about Jang Seung-eop and his Sansu inmuldo painting. I'm not saying his paintings are boring or anything, it's just that.. Too much information. Sansu inmuldo means "the picture of a man in the landscape". The original is a bit unclear because it's old, but you can see that it's artistic.

The funny part is that none of the ancient painted images look anything like the real person or persons. The ones in the paintings are too fat and chubby. Almost like the Asian versions of Santa. But I guess every era has its own style. My style is more digital. I don't like digital drawing, but it's pretty similar to digital drawings.

'Mae!'

I sat up straight in my chair with a start. Mr. Jin was looking straight at me.

'Yes? Sir?', I asked timidly.

'Please pay attention during class', He said, 'But you must've been so careless because you know things right? Let me ask you a question then'.

Oh no, I gulped.

'Who drew Yeongtong donggudo?' He said, tapping his long ruler along the edge of his desk.

'Gang Se-hwang?', I asked in return.

'I'm asking you the question, don't give me a question as an answer', He said, 'A question is a question. You're right. Next!'

I squirmed in my seat uncomfortable under the gaze of the other students. Mr. Jin can be pretty strict when he wants to, despite his beggar appearance. Get one answer wrong-

'Name me a painter during the early- to mid-Joseon Dynas-'.

'Yi Am!', I said and covered my mouth.

'Hmph! So you did study', Mr Jin broke into a smile, 'However I still won't encourage distractions during my class Mae. When you come here, when all of you come here I want you all to leave all that nonsense about Lee Min-ho and BTS and what is that other thing…? Right! Ginny and Georgia'.

The class broke out in laughter. Even I had to smile.

'Okay? So please, like I said, genius or not, pay-attention-during-class', He concluded his lecture.

'So going back to Sim Sa-jeong…..'

And that was how I spent my entire day at the university.

Dad told me that he has to stay at the university till late night again. Apparently, our end of year concert was coming up and the teachers were discussing and planning the schedules. I know for a fact that he's going to make me sign up for one of the items. Last time I got nominated to be Juliet. This time I really don't mind being a tree or-or a stone perhaps. Dad told me to take the bus but I decided to slow-walk after having lunch at the canteen.

The university's a large place with lots of places to sit and sleep and do literally anything. My favourite spot was under the Osmanthus tree. Just when I was passing it on my way to the gate something pulled my memories again. Sweet Osmanthus….Osmanthus cakes. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath of its sweet scent.

'Sun-Hee! Let me buy you one, it's not that expensive', Jae-Sung said pointing at a stall.

'I'm not that hungry, Soochul make him stop', I said as I grabbed the hand of my older brother.

'What's wrong with letting him buy you one?', Soochul said.

I looked at him with surprise and Jae-Sung pouted, 'So rude'.

He was tall enough to beat Soochul, but behaved like a six-year-old whenever I'm near.

Soochul was wearing a straw hat with a veil that hung down from the edges of it. I wore a silk pink veil that covered the bottom half of my face from below my eyes. If anybody saw us, the royal heirs walking around in broad daylight….

Jae-Sung of course had nothing to hide, he was strolling around like he owned the place. A little girl on the side offered me a slice of Osmanthus cake.

'Jae-Sung', I called, 'Buy it from her'.

He turned back and smiled at me, 'You're so kind hearted princess'.

He offered the little girl some extra money and she squealed in delight.

I took the cakes from Jae-Sung and held them under my nose.

I opened my eyes and smiled. It's the same scent. Sweet Osmanthus. Hold on….

Now it was different, more like my dad's perfume. I turned my head as I heard a branch snap.

'Oh, it's you', Jae-Sung said, squinting, 'I was just wondering who was daydreaming under some tree'.

I was stunned. Osmanthus flowers scattered around us flowing in the breeze.

This time he was wearing a black jacket with a pair of ripped jeans.

'What?', He asked, 'You're so weird, stop staring. It's creeping me out'.

His sharp voice snapped me back to reality.

I scowled, 'I'm not weird, besides you were the one who followed me'.

'Follow you?', Jae-Sung said mockingly, 'Who followed you? I just happened to be passing from the head's office until I noticed you'.

'What were you doing at Ms. Sara's?', I asked surprised.

Please, not art. Not art

'Architecture, transfer from Aussie', He said curtly, 'I'm guessing you do art'.

'How-'

He pointed to my shirt that was blotched with red and blue droplets of paint.

'Oh! So uh, you do architecture….', I said quickly, changing the topic.

'Yup, so I have to get going because-',

'You have very important matters at hand', I concluded, 'Whatever, it's not like I know you or anything'.

I waved my hand dismissively. Jae-Sung or not, I didn't like his tone. I'm not interested in being treated like crap.

'Ha! You're right', He said smiling, 'I'll take my leave first'.

I didn't even bother looking at him as he walked away. I felt a sharp pang in my heart. Why is he so different? I feel like he's someone totally new. Why did he have to be like this….

I looked back at the Osmanthus tree.

"Blossoms carry my heartache away, sweet Osmanthus when did you taste so bitter…."