Left Behind

She had left. Argus was devastated - and I was, too. He blamed me and I couldn't blame him. It was my fault that she had left.

She had a long conversation with my father and afterwards she just left. My father told me I had to wait - but for how long?! When would she come back?

I could already feel the pain of being away from my mate. She felt it, too right? How could she bear it?

I groaned. The night I recognized her as my mate was still a blur. She had just left me standing there and when I finally made up my mind to go look for her she was gone.

The next day she came over. I had been so full of hope, but it was just to inform me that she would be gone for a few months to 'work on her issues' whatever that meant.

"We need to give her time." Argus sighed. I nodded. "She's our mate. She will forgive us." He tried to cheer me up. I sighed. We both sighed.

It was really hard to think positive. At last she still didn't look at me full of hatred and she didn't seem to fear me. That was good, right? Right?

"She hasn't rejected us." Argus reminded me. I nodded. "And Dad said she told him she went away to work on herself." I added.

I had told my Dad that we were mates. I kinda had hoped he would forbid her from leaving, but he allowed it. I wanted her by my side. I wanted to make up for all the shit I put her through. I wanted to be the best mate there could be and I would wait for her as long as she needed it.

"How could I have fucked up everything so bad?"

I took out my phone. I hadn't told her yet that I was Randi, although I knew she was Frost_Moon. It was my secret life line to still be a part of her life while she was gone. I probably should tell her, but what if she blocked me? What if she stopped talking to me? What if she hated me even more?

I was scared. I knew I was a coward, but this was my mate and I really didn't want her to hate me more than she already did. There was no hate in her eyes whenever she looked at me, but deep down I was convinced that she hated me. She had to hate me. She had to, because the alternative was too scary. If she didn't hate me and didn't love me then I was nothing to her at all. I'd rather she hate me and be angry at me than not being in her heart at all.

I looked at our last messages. She had told me she had found her mate and that she was sad it wasn't me. I swallowed, I felt guilty, not confession right then and there. But again, I was a coward.

I asked her how she was doing and she told me her mate had been a bully and she was now in therapy to deal with it.

"Why didn't you reject him?" I asked. This was my last question. She hadn't answered since.

I put the phone away and turned on the TV to watch some series. I must have dozed off, when I woke up it was already evening. I checked my phone. A new message! From her!

My heart was beating fast in my chest as I opened it.

"He's my mate. Why would I just reject him? Do you know how much pain that would cause mine and his wolf? They are innocent in the issues I have with that person. I will find a solution so please don't worry about me. I hope you will find your mate and you will be happy with your choice."

"I in fact found my mate." I confessed to her. "I have been an asshole to her but I hope she will forgive me. She is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and I want to do my best to make it up to her so she will only smile for the rest of her life."

"Congratulations. I hope she can forgive you and you have a chance to make it up."

I pressed the phone tightly to my chest.

"I hope so, too." I whispered. "Please forgive me." I thought. "I will never hurt you again. I will do anything. I will go to therapy, too. I will take anger management classes. I will be the perfect mate to you."

Right after this thought I actually went down to my parents and told them that I wanted to go to therapy because of what happened to my sister and the issues I still have because of it all.

They were surprisingly open. Why hadn't I done this sooner? Many issues could have been prevented if I had just talked to my parents and gotten help sooner. I was such an idiot!

I would tell her when she was back, that I went to therapy as well. That I was working on myself. That I was becoming a better person just for her. To be worthy of being her mate!

I would be worthy!