(102) Surgeries

Shigure reviewed my conversation with his annoying colleague when he returned and laughed until he cried.

"Uki-chan, you are amazing," he sighed, lying down beside me. "What would I do without you? No wonder he looked so stressed when he finally came out from the room and apologised to me so seriously. Good job. Unfortunately, when he goes back and thinks about the conversation some more, he will realise that we're still hiding things from him. But at least we have a little longer before they come try question us again. They actually have people who know who we are, but those people don't seem to want to use the information much. Possibly because it would be too risky if other nations found out we are here. Your conversation with him has at least given me a better understanding of what the government is thinking and planning."

*"You haven't been showing them any of your abilities either, have you?"* I asked Shigure.

*"Just the abilities of a good normal agent. I'm pretty good at the craft even without special talents and abilities, don't you think?"* Shigure raised his nose to the sky and I nodded, laughing at him.* "That said, they do try very hard to make life difficult for me in the hopes I'll show them some of my special abilities. It's not easy thinking of ways around those problems."*

He gave me a hug and I listened to his thoughts on some of the complicated things he had needed to do. When he showed off his ninjutsu which was almost better than some of the people who specialised in it here, he had shocked them. Now there was a friendly rivalry on who had the better skills. This was better than them being so suspicious.

Then he told me about the plans for my future surgeries. I buried my face in his chest, feeling him still aching with guilt for having been so weak as to being susceptible to being tricked and hypnotised by his clan members, such that he had been used to hurt me. I didn't want to know what they were going to do to me. I didn't want to hear about the details, but Shigure lightly patted both my cheeks in remonstration.

"Uki-chan, you have to be responsible for yourself and your own health. You are going to get better. When you are better, we are going to live in our own apartment and have our own safe, happy and stable lives. When we have the chance, I'll bring you home. Then we'll go find Homeward, Apricorn and Susan. We'll build a new home there with all our friends. We'll have our babies one by one and the two of us will have a happy family. We'll bring up the children with all our love. What do you think?"

Shigure described the house he would build for me and then described the nursery, while drawing various designs in his mind. I listened, pulled toward the peaceful image, calming down somewhat.

When he saw that he had managed to draw me out of my reluctance, he began talking about my surgeries again. Besides the fixing of the waterworks, they were later going to perform an operation on my pelvis and hips. Shattered bone fragments would be cleared up so that they wouldn't accidentally harm any organs and they were going to reshape and completely replace one hip joint. Later, parts of my spine would be cleaned up bit by bit. Following that, tendons in a knee would be replaced and then a shoulder would be mended. An elbow. Other bits and pieces including brain surgery would be mixed up in there to clear up some blood clots.

As I listened, I fell asleep, feeling glad Shigure could care about these things for me.

A few days or perhaps it was weeks later, I was put under anaesthetic. Corridor lights whizzed by and blurred. Shigure was crying silently by my side when I woke up, still blaming himself for my predicament.

Silly. Hadn't I told him that I'd forgiven him?

Taking a few deep breaths to reinflate my sticky lungs, I wrapped him up in all my love and forgiveness through our link, which only making him sob even harder. Hugging him tight, I drifted back off. The anaesthetic hadn't completely worn off yet.

I had just recovered from one surgery when I was sent in for the next and the next. Shigure was sent back out on missions and I seldom saw him, but I felt his love and care through our links. He paid attention to my condition from a distance. As a reward for getting through another surgery, he'd give me a 'cherry' on top of a figurative cupcake when he couldn't bring me a real one - a kiss. Although not as good as a physical kiss, it was enough to tide me over until it was time for the next surgery. Sometimes. Sometimes I needed more than one kiss because there were complications and I needed extra surgery.

In the present, the only person who visited regularly was Miki-san. She had finished her rehab and was back at work. She helped care for, tut over me and kept me company when she was free. Sometimes, she'd mull over certain aspects of a case with me, keeping us both occupied. Honestly, if it weren't for her, I was sure I wouldn't have recovered with any cheer or good spirits at all. The long hospital stay and series of surgeries were starting to wear on me.

I was thoroughly fed up with the hospital and all the surgeries. The constant stress and pain. All the rehab. My auto-interpret ability flickered at times, leaving me feeling lonely and bewildered. I couldn't help being irritable and crying when no one was looking, complaining to Shigure at night through our link.

I was a completely useless person now. Just a doll for people to hone their surgical skills on. Just a broken tool, being a waste of space and a money drain.

"Nodoka-chan, Nodoka-chan," Miki-san gently shook me, pinching a cheek. "Are you listening to me?"

I didn't want to see her or hear her anymore. Didn't want anyone or anything to see me or bother me. I felt so frustrated that it had been so long but I was still lying in a bed, unable to get up. Unable to walk. Unable to even go to the toilet by myself. I wanted quiet. Silence. I didn't want anymore surgeries or doctors or medical staff. Didn't want anymore pity or sympathy or feigned compassion. I wanted to get out. Get out of here.

Through my link, I felt Shigure's fear and recognition at what my rising emotions that I could no longer hold in check might result in. He abandoned whatever important thing he was doing wherever he was and threw himself through the link to try and hug me. Hold me down. Stop me from exploding.

"Uki-chan," he said through gritted teeth, trying to help contain my emotions before the expanding ball of frustration grew large enough to randomly trigger my ability centre. "Calm down. Calm down. Don't hurt yourself or others. You have to contain it. Just a bit longer. There's only one more surgery left. They said you might be able to walk again after that. Calm down."

But I was beyond reasoning now.

I couldn't take it anymore. Something, somewhere was going to give. I needed to vent.

Vaguely I heard Miki-san screaming.

There was banging, shattering and clattering sounds. The bed and ground beneath me shook while lights flickered.

Shigure lost his hold on me for a split second in trying to stop everything and in that moment, I had leapt out of bed only to bang into the ceiling and land painfully on the floor.

Various alarms bleeped and beeped.

People rushed into the room and a pale Miki-san was rushed out by cowering staff while lights and electrical equipment around me sparked.

*"Harmony,"* came the stern voice of the Creator Father, causing me to pause.

In the next moment, I was swept away in the spirit, while my injured body was left for the medical staff to find and deal with.

The next moment, I was in warm, loving and understanding arms. The Creator Father held me tight while I cried up a storm, flailing my arms and legs in my frustration at everything. He didn't say anything. Only crooned to me and kept on holding me tight until I calmed down. When I was feeling better, I was passed back to Shigure who was still far away. Why did he have to be so far away? Why couldn't I be unreasonable for once?

And then, I found I was back in ICU. I couldn't help crying and crying and crying. They had to hook me up with a bag of fluids to ensure I didn't get dehydrated, but even as I lay limp, numb and sore, I could only keep crying. Tears trickled down the sides of my face toward my ears and through my hair. I made my pillows damp.

The nurses were concerned that they couldn't figure out why I was crying and thought perhaps that I was in pain.

*"You're ok. It's ok,"* Shigure comforted me through the link. *"Things are going to get better. It's not much longer now."*

How long had it been already? One year? Two? More? I had lost track of time. Was I ever going to get better?