Chapter Four

Chaos.

Chaos broke out everywhere In my house. My family members were around, even some I don't know personally,they stayed in the boys quarters since they arrived a day before yesterday in preparation for my wedding. They have been running around the house putting things in order.

I'm getting married today.

This is just ridiculous, I'M ACTUALLY GETTING MARRIED. I'm nervous as hell, there's an unsettling feeling at the pit of my stomach. I'm sitting on my bed, dressed in my traditional wedding attire, some of my cousins and Amina's friends are in the room with me, i have only few friends that are going to be attending my wedding today. The groom's family will soon be here, the Sadaki (bride's price) will be paid before we move to the hall we rented for this occasion. My eyes have been trained on the clock ever since I got ready, I want to get this over with and finally sleep to my heart content. My phone beeped signalling a notification, i took my phone to check it out, it was a message from Nabeel. Awww that's cute, I thought smiling at my phone, i clicked on the notification to open the message and my heart literally stopped.

Layla, I'm sorry. I really am but I can't do this, i thought I could do it, i really did try, i thought I could give into my father's desires again but I can't. I'm sorry that I had to give up at this point but I can't take it any longer, my heart isn't ready for this, at least not with you, I hope you understand my plight and forgive me someday for ruining your happiness.

Sirens were going off in my head, my heart was beating at an unbelievable fast rate, my ears were ringing, my eyes were stinging from the tears that promised to roll out anytime soon. He can't possibly do this to me. Can he?

Let me explain please, nothing I say justify my actions, but please forgive me Layla. My dad literally controls my life, from when we were young, that's why he and Zayyad never get along. I wanted to study Law down here in Nigeria but he made me go abroad to study Business Administration, i never had the guts to confront him, It wasn't respect, i was scared of him, even as a full grown man, i still am, that's why even today I didn't tell anyone I was leaving, I couldn't face them, i couldn't face you, I'm a coward Layla and I know that, I've got issues to take care of, I'm going to see a professional to help me when I get to the states, i should have boarded the plane while you are reading this message, i didn't stand you up for another woman, i swear, i just need to clean myself up. I've signed half of my shares and properties into your name as I promised, it's nothing compared to what I'm doing to you, the humiliation i'm causing you, but I hope you understand me one day and find a place in your heart to forgive me.

What was he thinking, i asked him if he was okay with the arrangement and he assured me that it's what he wants. He left his properties in my name, that fucking asshole, who does he think he is.

Men are scum. How did I not see this coming. He has not been talking to me, anytime we saw each other he avoided me like a plague.

The waterworks had already exploded, i ran downstairs, pushing people out of my way, i needed to find mama. I spotted mama and baba talking to Nabeel's mum and dad. Mama's skin was pale, it could either be because of the stress of the wedding or because they were telling her what I just found out. I walked to were they were standing, tears streaming down my cheeks, as soon as mama spotted me, she crushed me into a hug. She was saying things to calm me down but it wasn't registering in my brain.

Nabeel's parents were standing in front of us, they looked ashamed or rather...Embarrassed?

Baba definitely needed his BP drugs.

I felt a shadow fall upon me, but I didn't care to look, then he spoke.

"This can be fixed, I'll marry her"it was Zayyad. These people are crazy! Do they really think I'll agree to this.

"You guys have done enough, please leave, we can handle this" I said, cleaning the tears on my cheeks, definitely ruining the makeup I put so much effort in applying today.

I didn't need a make up artist for my wedding. I am a makeup artist.

"Layla, please listen to me, it's an arranged marriage, nobody really knows the groom, please save us from this shame" baba finally spoke up.

I was shocked beyond measure, how can he say that, I'm not some kind of family thing they can just pass around.

"Baba, i refuse to be treated like this, just because they are rich doesn't mean they can't treat us li... "I was cut short by mum.

"Darling please listen to me"she said, holding my chin, there was tears in eyes, "Layla please, it was arranged so there's no problem with getting married to him, just do this for me...please"she whispered the last word, the word was strained, it was filled with so much pain, I've never seen mama like this in my whole 21 years of living,and it tugged at my heart.

"Mama it's ok"I said hugging her, "you're right, it's no big deal, I'll marry him"

Oh but it was. It was a very big deal. I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with him so it was a big deal. I felt my heart breaking literally, not because I was in love with him, but because I felt let down, I felt my anxiety surfacing.

But I didn't say anything, I kept mute and stayed in my mum's embrace.

The Garba's have been standing on the same spot, just staring at us.

"Somebody should tell Abba and Amina"I said to no one in particular, "let's get this over with."

When I stepped into my room, there was no one inside the room, i locked the door and slide down it, pulling my knees to my chest, I cried to my heart content until I felt numb.

When I was sure I wouldn't break down again today, I walked to my mirror and sat in front of it. My eyes were red and swollen from crying so much, I cleaned up my makeup, and started applying makeup again.

But the time I was done, everything was covered up, the concealer covered up my swollen eye, from crying hard earlier.

I called Amina, she sounded worried, but I told her not to worry about me, i told her to give me a call when it's time to come down, then I layed on my bed to rest for sometime.

Just this morning I was excited to get married, i couldn't believe it was happening, now I don't what I'm feeling, but it doesn't feel good. Throughout, my smiles were fake, anybody that knew me very well could detect it.

Some females including my mom escorted me to Zayyad's house after the reception, when they left Zayyad showed me to my room and went to his. He didn't spare me a glance, or talk much,this doesn't feel right, it's not going to end well, what did I get myself into, Nabeel was the last thing I thought if before I drifted to sleep.