6. Making the Case

Making the Case

Lincoln: The Loud Family trophy case. My sisters have done some pretty impressive stuff to get in here. There are Lynn's soccer trophies, Lola's pageant crowns, Lisa's Junior Nobel Prize, even Lily's won her thumb sucking contests! And then there's me. [shows that such trophies are in their proper spots, but his spot is completely vacant and sighs] I've tried everything to get into this trophy case.

And yet he did, but every attempt from karate to running a marathon, even entering a beauty pageant.

Judge: And the winner of the Little Miss Cutie Pie Pageant is...Liiiiiiiiiiinnnnnn-dsay Sweetwater! [Lincoln sulks]

But no dice. The poor boy had no chance of winning any trophy. Until today that is.

Lincoln: The 5th Grade Video Contest. Whoever's video gets the most votes wins this beauty. [points to trophy on display, breathes on the glass, and draws a heart around it, Clyde wipes it off]

Clyde: You really think you're going to win, Lincoln?

Lincoln: With what I have planned, I'm a shoe-in.

Clyde: You said the same thing about the Cutie Pie pageant.

Lincoln: [defensively] I was robbed! [calmly] Grab your camera.

Later at Lincoln's house, he and Clyde were in progress of making a trophy winning video submission.

Lincoln: Are we rolling? [in character] Hey, fifth grade! Lincoln Loud here! Ever wonder what happens when 672 breath mints meet 88 gallons of diet soda? Well, you're about to find out!

On Lynn's skateboard he rides off a ramp onto a catapult where he is launched by Charles and Cliff into a swimming pool full of diet soda, causing the soda and mints to shoot out like a geyser. Meanwhile at the other side of the front yard, Laney was painting a picture of the house.

Laney: Lets see. Tree goes there, ball is next to the stairs. Uh Walt, do you mind moving a few inches to your right. [Walt did so] Perfect! [continues to dash the bush along the canvas] Gee! Those art classes at school are really paying off. Maybe this could my personality: a creative young artist with an ever growing pas-

Laney was then splashed by the root beer from Lincoln's stunt. Leaving her completely soaked, and her painting washed away.

Laney: [sighs, then sits down] This can be very frustrating to a small and very inspired child...

[We go back to Lincoln and Clyde]

Clyde: [drenched in soda] That was amazing! You're right. Everyone's gonna vote for this.

To there dismay, as soon as they uploaded it, no one voted.

Lincoln: Why isn't anybody voting for this?

Clyde: Maybe because they're all voting for this HamstaCam video. [uploads video of what is simply a hamster just running around in his wheel like any other hamster]

Lincoln: [notices the vote total] 50 votes?! Pssh! What's so great about some dumb hamster? [Geo overheard that and chitters at him angrily] Not you, Geo. You're awesome.

Clyde: Hey! We got a vote! No, wait, it's a comment.

Nice try, U shld go to UR BIG SISTER'S site for some tipzz. Her videos R sick: L.O.L. COMEDY CHANNEL

Clyde: Sick? Oh, no! Do you think they have a virus!

Lincoln: It means awesome, Clyde. Click the link.

[Clyde does so]

LUAN OUT LOUD'S COMEDY CHANNEL

Lincoln: Cute, but how many people wanna watch Luan- [notices her fan total] 50,000 followers?! Clyde, do you know what this means?

Clyde: People waste a lot of time on the internet?

Lincoln: No! It means Luan can help us win the video contest! Come on!

[Luan is looking over Lincoln's video]

Luan: Mm-hmm...

Lincoln: Pretty sick, right?

Clyde: That means awesome.

Luan: Yeah, not in this case.

Lincoln: [shocked] What?!

Luan: Sorry, Linc. Stunts are so last year. If you want to win the contest, you have to make funny videos.

Lincoln: Well, how do I make those?

Luan: Easy. You just follow my one simple rule. Keep your camera on at all times, because you never know when you'll strike comedy gold. Ooh! Like this! [films Clyde picking his nose]

Clyde: Aw, come on! Erase that!

Luan: Don't worry, Clyde. I would never post it without your permission. Besides, I said comedy gold, not digging for gold. [laughs]

And so with that, Lincoln and Clyde tried to find some funny stuff for their video by keeping the camera on like Luan said. But a few hours has passed and all they got was Lynn bouncing her soccerball and Laney painting another painting of the house.

Lincoln: We've had the camera on all day! Where exactly is this comedy gold?" [beat] Clyde? Are you listening to me?

Clyde: Sorry, Lincoln. I was just worried that Lynn was going to accidentally step on that rake, resulting in a series of escalating mishaps.

Lincoln: That's great, Clyde, but-series of escalating mishaps?! [hides in a bush to film Lynn]

Lynn: [bouncing a Soccer ball off her head] 56...57...58...59... [steps on the rake and gets hit] Ouch!

The ball bounces off a pole and onto her face, sending her flying onto a trampoline where she bounces off and lands in the soda pool. Meanwhile the ball bounces the pole again, and hits Laney at the back of her head, and she fell face first on her pallette, getting paint all over her face. She tried rubbing it off until the paint resembles her face as a clown.

Lincoln: That was hilarious!

Clyde: Let's go upload it! This is gonna get a ton of votes!

Lincoln: I don't know, Clyde. Enough votes to beat HamstaCam?

Clyde: [shakes his fist] HamstaCam!

Lincoln: [gets an idea] If we struck comedy gold with one sister, with ten, we'll have Comedy Fort Knox!

[They laugh evilly]

Next they filmed Luna.

Luna: [in a British accent] Just like me idol, Mick Swagger. ALL RIGHT! [splits and rips her new jeans] Oof!

Lincoln: [zooms in on the rip] Ooh, drafty.

Then they filmed Lucy

Lucy: [holds a bust of a vampire] Oh, Edwin, I know you're forbidden to love a mortal like me, but I can't resist your piercing gaze, your sparkly skin, your icy lips... [kisses the bust and gets its wax lips over hers]

Lincoln: Hmm...maybe something like this is a little too personal.

Clyde: [checks the school's site's poll] HamstaCam just got 10 more votes!

Lincoln: [shakes fist] HamstaCam! Eh, it's not that personal. Keep rolling.

Soon they fimed embarassing moments of all of Lincoln's sisters. From Lori farting, to Lola's nighttime retainer. To Lisa fumbling while reading her science book, to Laney's ballerina dance session, to Lana eating gum out of the garbage. And Lori farting again.

Clyde: [intoxicated] Ah, Lori's toots. It's like music to my ears.

Lincoln: Now, this is gonna beat HamstaCam! Let's go upload it!

Clyde remains under the guise of Lori's flatulence and Lincoln drags him with him. The next day, the school was a buzz about Lincoln's video.

Female Classmate: Lincoln, your video rocks! You got my vote!

Male Classmate: Man. Lucy and that sculpture? What a weirdo!

Female Classmate: And how about Lori?

Male Classmate: You mean Miss Toots-A-Lot? She should see a doctor about that.

[As the kids laugh, Lincoln starts to look a little worried]

Female Classmate: So embarrassing.

Lincoln: [worrying] Embrrassing?

Male Classmate: Yeah! My sisters would pulverize me if I posted a video like that!

Lincoln: [scared] Pulverize?

Clyde: You can't get pulverized, Lincoln! I'd never be able to find another best friend!

Lincoln: You won't have to. After I win the trophy on Friday, I'll just delete the video.

Clyde: [hugs his best friend] Just in case...we had a good run, buddy.

Lincoln: Don't worry, Clyde. My sisters will never know.

[But just as he opens the door, his sisters are right there, and they are incredibly furious]

Clyde: They know.

[The sisters rant about Lincoln's video]

Lincoln: Wait, wait, wait! Let me explain!

Lori: You've got extra three seconds before we pulverize you!

[Lynn cracks her knuckles and Lisa starts a stopwatch to time Lincoln's very limited time]

Lincoln: There was this video contest at school and I really wanted to win!

Lola: YOU SHOWED MY SLEEP FACE FOR SOME STUPID CONTEST?!

Lincoln: I just wanted a trophy to put in the case like you guys!

Luna: You think you deserve a trophy for that, bro?

Lincoln: No. I don't deserve it. Look! I'll delete the video!

Lucy: Too late, Lincoln. The damage has already been done.

Lynn: You made me look like a fool!

Lucy: You made me look like a freak!

Lori: You made me look like I fart! And for the record, it was these shoes! See? [tries to make it look like they were making the farting noise but fails] Of course it's not working now.

Lincoln: Lori, I'm sorry! Wait! [chases after his sisters]

[Clyde leaves]

Lincoln: "Luna, let me explain!"

Luna: [drowning Lincoln out with heavy metal frustration] Can't hear ya, bro!"[slams her door]

Lincoln: Leni! Lori! I'm sorry!

Lori: You literally disgust me!

Leni: Yeah! [walks into the wall and gets dragged in by Lori]

Lincoln: Lola! Lana! Please!

Lola: You're uninvited to my birthday party FOREVER! [slams the door]

[Lincoln sighs and Lana opens it which he thinks she will forgive him]

Lana: I wanna slam it, too! [does so]

Lincoln: [knocks on Lisa's door] Lisa! Lisa? [Lisa slides a note under the door] "Vengeance shall be mine." [turns to Lynn and Lucy] Guys, come on! I'm your brother!

[Lynn growls in fury]

Lucy: I have no brother! [starts to close the door then opens it] I know I say that a lot, but this time...I mean it. [slams door]

Lincoln: Luan, you gotta help me! I was only doing what you said!

Luan: You broke the unspoken rule: never post a video without the person's permission!

Lincoln: Why didn't you tell me that?

Luan: Because it's unspoken. [slams door]

Lincoln went downstairs only to find Laney sitting on the couch with her arms crossed. He then went to her in hopes she will be reasonable.

Lincoln: Laney, there you are! You can forgive me right?

Laney: I wish I could, but I can't. You posted my most embarassing moment online! Did you really thought It was a good idea to expose your sisters like that? Just so you can win some video contest? [Lincoln looks down and realizes what he has done]

Lincoln: [sighs, rubs the back of his neck] I... I didn't mean to humiliate you, I just thought it was funny. [Laney turns her back on him] Okay, not helping. I'm really sorry Lanes. Is there anyway I can make it up to you, to all of you?

Laney: I may have an idea. [points to the computer]

Lincoln sighs and walks towards the computer, knowing what he had to do.

Lincoln: Well, goodbye, trophy. [deletes the video]

Computer: DELETED.

Lincoln: Well, HamstaCam, looks like you win.

[Extra footage of HamstaCam shows the hamster slipping out of his wheel and getting sprayed by his drinking tube]

Lincoln: I guess it's hard for anyone to have the camera on you all the time. [gets an idea] Camera on you all the time! That's it! [goes to Luan] Luan! You said your one simple rule is to always have your camera on, right?

Luan: That is correct, Captain Obvious.

Lincoln: Then I'm going to need to borrow all your footage of me.

Luan: You mean...Comedy Fort Knox? [reveals a vault of footage of Lincoln she's filmed over the years]

Later in Lincoln's room...

Lincoln: Hey, fifth grade! Lincoln Loud here! Ever wonder what happens when one brother messes up and embarrasses all ten of his sisters? I didn't think you would. But this is how you fix it. [holds up a copyright card] Oh, and for legal reasons, all videos were provided by Luan Loud Out, LLC. All right reserved, patent pending. Let 'er rip!

So Lincoln made a new video, and this time it all about him and all of his embarrassing moments. From grooming his chest hair, to smooching a picture of Cristina, to watching a sappy reality show, to sleeping with his stuffed bunny, and even more smooching. Soon everone was laughing out loud at his video. Except for a stunned Cristina.

Female Classmate: Oh, Lincoln.

Male Classmate: And just to be clear, we're laughing at you, not with you.

Female Classmate: I thought your sisters' video was embarrassing, but this takes the cake! And still to lose out to a hamster? Ouch! [Lincoln sighs in defeat]

By the time he got home, Lincoln sees his sisters are STILL mad at him.

Lori: [sternly] Lincoln...

Lincoln: [apologetically] I know I embarrassed you and I can't undo it, and I'm sorry, but the least I could do was embarrass myself right along with you, that way we'd all be even!

Lynn: Even? You think this makes us even?

Lincoln: Well, I was trying to-

Laney: It totally makes us even!

Lynn: Yeah, yours was way worse!

Lori: [cheerfully] Yeah! That video was hysterical!

[The girls surround Lincoln and ensure him that they forgive him]

Lincoln: So, we're good?

Lucy: We're good...brother.

Luan: Sorry you didn't win the trophy.

Lori: But we really appreciate what you did and thought you deserved something. [hands him a tiny trophy]

Lincoln: Wow. Thanks, guys.

Lola and Lynn hug him and Luna pats him on the head. He runs to the case and puts the trophy in his spot, Laney came over and puts her arm around him.

Laney: Well, you finally did it.

Lincoln: Yep, you guys no longer despise me. Cristina's switching classes, and I finally made the case.

[Another flatulent sound occurs and the other girls look at Lori suspiciously]

Lori: It was my shoe!

Laney and Lincoln only giggled.