From wilting to blossoming

The sound of me slapping the pages open to explorer of an old treasure. I become the pirates of my own memories. The soft music surrounding my ear leads me to the deeper levels of my memory bank that I don't share with others. Scanning through my middle school's picture book makes me nostalgic. Taste of bittersweet. How I miss those times when I was just a child looking to figure out a way to make friends. It was a totally new world to me at the time. How far have the times taken us with those recollection? It's been almost 10 years.

"I'm missing him." I muttered something inside of me that I want to express.

He is affectionate and enjoys making me jump for joy. He jokingly referred to me as an alien because my name rhymes with aliens. I'm not sure where it's similar. But I liked it when he called me that. In Malaysia, there is an animated series called 'Boboiboy,' which he remembers the intro song and sings to me virtually every day, before we started studying. It was almost like an alarm clock for me.

His skin is pale, and his lips are pink. Not too tall and quite intelligent. Almost all of my middle school schoolmates liked him, especially my best friend at the time. Not my current best friend, but back in middle school.

In middle school, I had a best friend. I lost contact with her when she transferred to another school. What a pity.

Is it wrong for me to miss him, especially considering the fact that I have no feelings for him? I'm happy to be able to have him by my side. We share a table, yet he is not my tablemate. We rarely argue with one another; most of the time, we just enjoy the company of each other. I have a lot of fond memories of him. Maybe, I think of him every time I'm in my high school. My brain kind of freezes when I just remember him. His shadow, the sweet smile he constantly gives me, his funny side, and his attractiveness. To me, they are all perfect.

It is not that he changed high school to the different district, his high school is only beside my school. But I find my courage at low degrees to confront him. When I started high school, my shy side embraced me when I was talking towards guys but not girls. Girls, I can communicate with them. But guy, is out of my limit. That's why I'm nervous about greeting him. Like a spring breeze shyly whispers in gentleness.

I recall us discussing our future high school. Which school did you select on the form in order to continue your studies? Why did you wish to attend that particular school? Why do you have to follow your sister's lead? Why didn't you want to go to the school that I listed on the paper? I only keep the last question in my heart. Too afraid to find the answer from him.

No doubt that I really miss him.

I closed my middle school's picture book. This is the part of history that I can't change. I let out a deep sigh. I took up my tote bag and grabbed the door holder.

"I'm leaving now." I informed my mother.

"Don't come back late." She answered back.

I cycled my bicycle to the book café, which was about 500 meters away from my house. I made the choice to spend my leisure time there. Only books can help me forget about the past. The fresh air breathes softly on my skin, making me feel freer than ever.

The environment around the book café is somewhat busy, either due to a study group or something else. I sigh. I just want to act like I was the main character who is reading alone and hoping that someone will come over to sit with me. The reality is unfair. Today, totally not the time for my daydream.

I chained my bicycle and parked it in the bicycle area, I would rather not have someone steal it. I stepped into the book café, got my favorite ice chocolate with extra whipped cream, and took a seat next to the large window. I get up and begin searching for the books that interest me and read them. As I read, I automatically become a part of the character and immerse myself in the story. I won't be able to hear anything from my surroundings. Too focused on diving the adventure.

Knock...knock…knock

What is the sound? Is it just my imagination? I pondered in my mind and just ignored it.

There is a sudden sound of someone pulling the chair and sitting in it. I glance at the person who is seated openly in front of me. My eyes question the eyes who are in front of me, to let him speak first.

Wait ! What ! A guy has taken the seat in front of me!

My eyes widened, and my mind began to fuss. What on earth did this guy think he was doing sitting in front of me? Why choose here? My gaze wanders across the book café, seeking for an empty seat; of course, the seat in front of me is empty, which is why he sits here. I inhaled my shaking breath and decided to continue reading.

You know what I mean! I can't focus!

The guy continuing to stay silent makes me want to try to escape, but I don't want to. I whined softly. It's too early to come back home. I peeked from my books to see him, and my eyes widened as he matched my gaze. I quickly averted his gaze and returned to my reading. The question completely blew my mind up. Why does he keep staring at me? Is there something wrong with my face? I took out my phone and opened the camera. There's nothing on my face. But why is he staring at me?

Hold on a minute! Is my daydream coming true?

Poetic feels :

The past,

Don't give me the curse anymore,

Cause,

I got a magic,

In myself.

Poem by: shinxdaisy