Troll

Oh my God it's a end game boss! What the heck are we supposed to do? Okay let's get the princess and her bodyguards out of here. "Everyone listen to me! I don't know how long I can distract this guy, so hurry up and get the princess out of here! There's a village just outside the woods to the west! I'll meet you there!"

Yeah I know, those are the words we call a 'death flag', but I think I'll be okay. I mean I'm the chosen one after all! Ha ha ha hell yeah! As I looked over to the princess I noticed her Knight-Captain Katrina looking at me with great respect in her eyes, and sorrow. "Don't you dare go dying on us! We still owe you from before. I don't care how you do it, but please make it out of here in one piece!" Katrina's eyes began to mist over as she suddenly took a rigid stance and saluted me. The other knights followed her actions, and proceeded to escort the princess up the hill that I came from. The princess was struggling to break free from the arms of Katrina, and suddenly began to yell. "I Princess Juliette, hereby order you to defeat that dragon!" I couldn't help but let out a soulless laugh as I replied to her with a bow. "As you order my princess!"

Of course I was laughing inside. My princess? Ha! The audacity! There's not a chance in hell of me winning, but I still have to square up or I'm not even a man! Time to charge in and pray I don't die. As I watched the group of super hotties disappear over the horizon, I let out a slow breath, and headed on over to mr. ugly over there. "Today is the day you die Al*u... I mean what's your name anyway?" Shit I almost got screwed for copyright! Anyway, can this guy even talk? "This one is called Schweizer and this shall be the last words that your puny existence shall ever hear. Prepare yourself and face your death with honor insect!"

The dragon then let a mighty roar that knocked over all of the trees in a mile radius. Weirdly I wasn't affected at all. He must not want this fight to end too quickly. Oh well, I'm not just going to stand here and accept my death! It's time to do or die! I got into a low stance and activated my Quickdraw skill. As I rapidly darted forward, I also simultaneously activated my sprint and omnidirectional skills. I unleashed my killing Intent skill and gave out a mighty roar cry. "F*s *o da!" Of course it's just a yell imbued with my skill and not the magical shout from that game located in a cold country. But I admit it felt right yelling that at this guy, I mean he looks like that evil black dragon from that game. How ironic huh? How crazy! My attack actually hit! And to think, I actually managed to give him a flesh wound! How is this possible?! Schweizer took a swipe at me but my body twisted in an insane way and I felt myself spinning rapidly in the air horizontal to the ground, and about 15 feet in the air. Suddenly I ended up landing a rapid and powerful kick on their lower jaw. What the hell?! I just launched the guy spinning through the air, and he landed about a mile away from me! Holy shit!!!! How is this possible?! His level and stats were so high, that I can't even read them, and yet I'm landing every hit and he's missing all of his! Wait a minute! I just remembered something crucial! His luck stat is zero! So how the hell is his level so high?! I need to ask him.

"Hey big guy! How is your level so high when you can't even land a single hit on me, this so called insect?" Schweizer let out and lonely sounding sigh, and then he began to speak. "My race of Ancient Dragon grows stronger as we age. We don't require combat to increase our levels, nor do we need to train our bodies to raise our parameters. As to why I can't hit you... it's because my luck stat has been zero since my birth and I was cast out of my nest by my mother when she noticed. I've been alone these millennia since. As such, it has always been my heart's desire to find a worthy opponent to take my life in battle, and end my miserable existence. This now falls to you. Consider yourself honored human! I have chosen you to end me! RRRRRRROOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRRRR"

I totally just got the feels. Argh I'm not crying you're crying! Let's do this thing! Activate Super Hero Landing! I launched myself high into the air, and held my sword in both hands as I dove face first towards the glowing red stone on Schweizer's throat. Suddenly as the sword pierced through, there was a sound like breaking glass, and I was suddenly launched about half a mile away. I rolled and rolled until I came to a stop. As I stood up and looked over, the dragon began to glow with a bright light and slowly became transparent. The two of us locked eyes, and Schweizer said in a voice full of emotion, "Thank you friend of my soul! Please accept my blessing as I finally leave this world! Good bye, and may we meet again in my next life!" With a sound like fairy bells ringing, the coolest dragon in the world vanished. Just before he left an amulet with a black dragon with red eyes appeared in my hands. Suddenly something else happened.

Ding! Ancient Dragon Schweizer has been defeated! Gained title 'Dragon Slayer'. Gained Amulet of the Dragon God, and 5.000.000 experience. You have leveled up...

A bunch of dings started going off in my head, and I know that my level is probably ridiculous right now, but I'm really curious about this amulet. Let's see here...

Name: Amulet of the Dragon God

Item Type: Divine Amulet

Item Rank: God

Item Description: This amulet was forged by the flames of the God of Dragons with the assistance of the God of Blacksmithing. The first individual to wear this amulet successfully will become it's sole owner. This is a unique item, the only one of its kind. The amulet is indestructible and grants its owner complete immunity to all forms of the fire element and heat.

Item Status: Unbound

Oh my God yes! Another cheat existence item! I really am the protagonist! Ha ha ha! Let's get this sucker on and get heading to that village. Ugh a village means more than a handful of people. I hope that I can deal with it. Alright off I go then! As I proceeded to rocket back up the hill I came from, I of course didn't forget to store all of those goblin corpses into my inventory. It was a pain to find them all since my fight with the dragon scattered them like leaves in the wind. However, all 100 of them are now in my possession! Let's get out if these cursed woods!

Before I knew it, I was back under the tree I woke up under and was looking down the hill and towards the village to the west. It looks like it's time to find that princess and try to convince her that I actually killed the dragon. She's probably going to be convinced I'm trolling her...