fear in my heart
I rolled and rolled on a soft comfortable bed when I heard my alarm beeping so I wake up " ohh shit ! shut up and let me sleep peacefully " this is not my first time being disturbed by my crazy clock alarm but I have no other choice but to wake up and get ready for school , yep am a teenager hardworking girl , beautiful and slim I can't be late for lecture because am a serious student " I can't let my mom down I have strive for success" I always wispperd this to my heart every time am I need to motivate myself, I get ready and went to school
" hi ! Amelia " marc shouted my name on top of her voice
" ohh! longest time I don't know we would meet like this
" yep, am so glad to see you again" he said with a big smile on his face I quickly flash back to our last discussion few months ago, he was asking me to be her boyfriend but still yet to give him a honest answer
" hmmm I have class now I will have to go "
" ok ! take care I will text you later " I am so relieved that I stop the discussion from going any further, well you can also say am a loner because I love being alone that might be the reason I don't have a boyfriend or whatever, after I have finished class I went to my mom place to greet her because am missing my mom already , by the time I got to my mom place she is not around I have to wait at the door step for a little more time maybe she would meet me at home, but still not arrived, so I decided to call her and ask
" what the hell " her number is unreachable I have to go back home but it is late I don't know what to do how will i get taxi to take me home it was Already late I just kept tweaking I could not see any taxi or any bike at all everywhere was silent I could only hear the sound of breeze not long I received a text message from Marc
" hi 👋 how are you doing"
I felt more pissed off because am not doing fine at all everywhere is getting darker well maybe I should have asked Marc to come and pick me up but I don't want to ask help from him to that will give him the chance to ask me out again, soon I hear foot steps coming at my back when I looked back I didn't see any one it makes me more scared I walked more faster again I heard the foot step approach and I looked back I saw no one this time around I ran as fast as I could then I looked back and saw a gang running after me it was this time I knew
" I am done for" my heart was pounding fast I am scared as ever in my life
" why are they running after me? are they thief
" my mommy am scared" suddenly my toe bang a rock and I fell down I was in so much pain soon they met me there
" hello pretty lady " one of the man in the gang said I frowned my face and am also scared with the little courage I gathered up I replied
" who are you people and why are u chasing after me"
"shh! don't you know you are sexy " he tried to touch my face I beat his hand away
another man said
" let's be fast before any body see us " I don't understand untill they tied my hands and cover my mouth with clothes I struggled but failed soon they stopped tour my clothes and my skirt now I confirmed they are rapist they are about six in number they slapped Me beat me and one of them raped me I cried my eyes out my heart break fear was a over my face my body was shaking, trembling in fear the first man to rape me then shouted
" she be virgin oo!" then one of the man in the gang then said remaining gang then said
" let's go it's okay we will catch another fish soon " they untied me and left me alone behind the bush I was weak I can't stand up my clothes was stained with blood I just want to get out of there as soon as possible thankful I saw a bike man I was scared to ride it but I am more scared to stay any more minutes there, I took it home straight when I checked my phone 10 missed calls from my mom and Marc self have called me every thing I experience weight in my heart
" oh God why does this have to happen to me? " I cried my eyes out
" no no I can't tell my mom never I tell my mom I will Carry my burden myself I can't never
" God help me carry my burden " I kept crying
"why will I lose my virginity to a stranger a nobody a rapist a gang" tears rolled on my cheek all my clothes was wet I felt ashamed of myself
" no value for me my virginity is gone ! "
I shouted and cried walking around like a rat
" wait.. wait.. I can't let anybody know about what happened tonight, my mum will be so sad and if it gets out am rape they will be looking at me with the eye of being raped, I can't be disgraced by people I will bury it in my heart. what if I get pregnant... oh God my savior please do not it happen am scared.. I can..... can't disgrace my family "
my heart was still breathing fast, faster than any other I later relaxed and feel asleep , I could not call my mom back because am scared .
the next day my body was feeling cold and shaking I don't want my mom to know I decided to go the far away hospital from our city I explained to the doctor
" doctor narvis I want to see you ma "
" oh come in girl , are you sick you looked stressed and cold "
" yes ma, am sick. I met unfortunate fate yesterday I was.. .Ra." I broke into tears before I could finish my statement, doctor narvis felt more worried and stand up and meet me she touched my shoulder and said
" you can always tell me anything trust me "
" doc I was raped yesterday night " I paused and take a deep breath" I was scared ma my heart is hurts "
" in cases like this you need to be strong for yourself, it is normal for your heart to hurt because of fear" the doctor treat injuries from the rape or and I was treated for sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and also the doctor about emergency birth control."
" It is important to receive birth control and treatment for STDs within 72 hours of the assault for maximum effectiveness".. I felt more relief since I have done the necessary things to be done by but I am still sad , I went home and rest I don't bother to go for class I just wanted to be alone ' I called my mom and talked to her so she won't be worried In my my mind I know everything is settled and no one will know about anything so I doze off to rest .