Discovery

I stopped shot on the spot when I heard Jade's hiss of admiration. Discretion and he make two; you should know that by now. He must overreact to everything. I then realized I had led them straight to my haven.

I turned suddenly towards them, which made them jump; they started to walk backward like they were frightened by me before they started running in all directions, touching everything.

Say they almost scared me. I thought I scared them but given their reaction now; I was next to the plate. I have to stop thinking that I have a scary face in the end because these four, no matter what state I'm in, act like it's nothing.

Ah, those kids, sometimes I wonder why me, but I assure you that they are the ones who should be wondering why them because I am not a gift.

Hands-on my hips, I observe them running around, forgetting my concern completely. Sometimes I don't know what to compare them to; they have no equality. These are unthinkable.

I only reacted when Jade was about to sit in the swing. "Don't even think about it," I shouted from my vantage point. All four stopped moving until I came up to their height.

"Nobody sat in the swing," I said with too much authority. Jade gently moved away from it as if he was ashamed. I was surprised. It's been a long time since I last used such a tone with others.

He only took three steps away from it before he started acting crazy again. I assure you that you don't want to be in my place.

Kidadults, that's what they are.

"OK," said Hart, approaching me, "Will you tell us now why you ran away like a hysterical chick?" Yeah, that's Hart speaking to me now.

"When I was little, I had nervous breakdowns that my father eventually retracted. However, I still have the after-effects, especially when I am exposed to a situation beyond my control or a sudden change. So it often happens to me that I get carried away. I seethe with rage and become aggressive."

"It is partly for these reasons that I am here. I have to face awkward situations to be able to control myself with others." it's easy to talk with them, they are not trying to change who I am, but they try to help me find another way to handle my shit.

Pensive, Hart listens to me carefully before answering confidently.

"Do you remember our first weeks together?" I nodded yes. "You said absolutely nothing; you looked at us with curiosity as if we were fairground animals."

"And you always jump when you feel the presence of someone too close to you. Sometimes we even wonder how he manages to feel the presence of others, even five or six inches away from him."

"You caught Jade's attention, and he promised to recruit you into our group, which he did. And today, you may not have realized it yet, but you let us get closer to you every day; without making faces or stepping back, you stand up to us. And you say what goes through your head without any detour, which leaves us perplexed each time, and that's what I like about you."

The others who discreetly listened to the conversation answered in one voice: "what we all love about you," without stopping at the search they were maintaining.

Hart continues to talk to me in the same friendly, reassuring tone after giving them a stern look they haven't even noticed. But they know that they have received his gaze: "shut up and wait your turn."

"It is, mostly, up to us to manage the shock of what you say—most of the time, without you realizing its extent and effects. My good man, you spare us nothing. That's what earned you this admiration from us. We know that you never lie. You are way too straightforward for that and never talk about yourself, your parents, or any other subject close to those matters."

"But that doesn't matter. We are waiting patiently to discover everything there is to know about this fascinating character that you are. Keep applying everything you've been told over the past few weeks and put them into practice."

"You have already made a lot of progress, and don't give up on your friend. You didn't want to hurt him. You have to talk to him to explain your intention. Even if you did the opposite and like us, he will understand, I'm sure. He may even hang out with us from time to time."

"Certainly not," Ethan yelled with a hint of annoyance. It was as if he was waiting for that to intervene.

"What's happening to you?" Hansley asked him, "What are these manners?"

Realizing that he had voiced his thoughts, he hastened to explain himself in vain since he only stutters inaudible and incomprehensible sentences.

"You will manage to blend in and continue like this, Mon Vieux."

Jade threw at me without looking at me. Lost in a book, he didn't take his eyes off, and Ethan settled down silently on the sofa with his mind elsewhere.

He has that expression on his face when he's lost in thought that amuses us all. He frowns, blinks, and touches his nose childishly.

But today, he's different. You can't read anything on his impenetrable and tense face, which worries me a bit. He is far too expressive not to show any emotion or expression on his face.

Hansley dropped the book with a bang on the mahogany wood coffee table I had brought up here, which almost caused my soul to be expelled from my body as the noise was deafening.

I got permission from the dean, who was aware of my situation, and he hastened to help me while giving me access to a few little privileges that proved very useful today.

He wanted me to be comfortable, especially to have a place of my own when the atmosphere on campus no longer suited me. "If there's anything else, let me know." That's what he told me, and no one was supposed to know about it. And here we are today.

"I want to know, how did you find this place, and who allowed you to make it a cozy little nest, huh friend?" He challenged me.

"You don't need to fuss about it, Hansley; you don't need to scare me. And there's no point in continuing to ask; I will not answer."

"I knew you were going to say that little prank."

"Apart from us, I don't want you to bring other people here, and don't leave anything lying around or poorly stored; otherwise, it will get hot here."

"Oh! Sir, is in his element, it seems, huh, what nerve!" Jade launched, who until now had made himself very small in the hammock he had appropriated.

"From today," he launched to be heard by all, "nobody. I said nobody should occupy the hammock. I requisition it."

Without having time to react, Hart and Hansley rushed toward him to take him off the hammock. "You come with us on the couch," said one of them, his voice distorted by the effort. "We leave this place to Aim and the swing to his darling."

They burst out laughing at those words. I don't even care about them. I walk over to Ethan, who hasn't said a word since his outburst.

He felt my presence overshadowing him. He jumped off the couch with a smile. A smile he wanted to be reassuring but produced the opposite effect of what he wanted. I grabbed his wrist, seeing his desperate face, and led him to the other unoccupied end of the roof. He followed me without resistance.

"Are you going to tell me what's happening to you?" he is the one I am closer to of the four of them.

He lifted his head toward me, looking at me with an alarmed expression plastered all over his face, then he snuggled up against me as if to cling to a last breath of life. Panicking at his sudden reaction, I froze on the spot, stunned with my arms hanging down my body until he came to his senses.

Once he calmed down, he pulled away from me while apologizing without looking at me. He went to the railing of the wall and leaned against it. I followed him and relied on the rampart while waiting for him to want to talk to me. We stayed like that for more than a minute before he decided to say a word.

"How old are you?" I heard him ask me. I did not expect this since I have been part of this group, and not one of them has mentioned my age. They don't give it any importance; we respect each other; that's all that matters.

"Tell me, and I'll tell you why I keep reacting like a sissy today. What do you think?"

I think I know why he acts like this, but it's always better to say what's on your mind, so we'll have a chance to clear our doubts and concerns. That's always what Hart told me. And Ethan is the one teaching me some signs of people's reactions, so I am confident about that. I think I can give it a try, but I want to hear him tell me.

I want us to talk to each other. I want him to speak to me. Just like they help me, I can also help sometimes. I think I can help too, if they give me the time.

"I'm seventeen," I tell him, without taking time.

"And shit!" he uttered, which made me giggle and earned me an incredibly burning flurry of slaps to my arm.

"Hey, it's burning!"

"I knew you were just a kid under your rugged and confident looks; I saw you. I spent a lot of time observing you to understand what I missed in your character. Your tics, your way of watching over us without others being able to detect you, are so subtle and pleasant. And I know what you did for Hart and Hansley."

He startled me with what he said, and I glared at him, trying to change position, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. He hastened to retort.

"Don't worry about that. It's between us." While he told me that, I put an arm around his shoulder. "Ah, yes, it's my turn today," I told him, seeing his shocked expression with a mischievous grin when he finished his sentence.

He struggled like a madman to get out of my grip, protesting when he heard my sentence. "See where it got you today, being so curious, hm? You fell in love with me."

"No, that's not what happened at all. You're mistaken, poor idiot. But, hey, what's the matter with you? Where's the Aim that I know?"

"So what is it?" I asked him, still with the same grin. These things he's the one who taught these to me.

He stopped fighting, resigned to his fate.

"OK, it's true. When you said you kissed that boy who looks like a doll, I felt like I had been stabbed. I screwed up, seriously."

I started laughing now.

"Stop being stupid," he said; "otherwise, these vultures will give me a hard time if they find out about all this."

"You don't want them to find out." I teased him. "I'll call Jade; he'll know how to make your party for the coming days."

"Hey, stop your nonsense, kid," he said with a severe look. "You know Jade has no filter. If he finds out, I won't even be good enough for the heist."

It's his turn now to laugh heartily as before, completely relaxed. I watch him laugh and thank him internally for his presence in my life.

After a while, he turned to me, staring at me with his beautiful hazel-laughing eyes.

"Nice to meet you." he mouthed. "The pleasure is all mine," I tell him with enthusiasm.

"So," Jade shouted from the other side of the roof, "Did you confess your feelings to him, Ethan?"

"Noisy brat!" Ethan yelled back without hesitation. "I am finished," he said softly, as if to himself.

They all burst out laughing, an excellent happy laugh. There is no more tension or stress; it has all dissipated.

I moved closer to his ear while he was laughing heartily with his head cocked to the side and whispering to him. "I admire you too, Ethan."

He gives me a wink that only he knows the secret before we head to the rest of the group. We spent the rest of the day discussing exciting topics and forgetting previous stressful situations.

This day taught us that speaking or communication is the basis of everything. Ethan understands that his feelings for me result from his admiration for me. Love is a complex feeling that you must take the time to understand.

According to the Greeks, love is the feeling responsible for many human actions, decisions, and states of mind. Therefore, they came up with four types or classifications of love to explain this very complex feeling one experiences when one loves someone. These are: Eros, Storgé, Philia, and Agapé.

Eros's love is based on a sensual, carnal, sexual, possibly loving, and passionate relationship. It can be delicious and... devastating. The intoxication of "love at first sight" can induce a strong desire for the other. There is a risk of living an illusion, of loving the image of another based on fantasies and imagination.

Philia's love is the attachment linked to a feeling of friendship associated with shared values, interests, and objectives. It is based on shared pleasures, exchanges, play, solidarity, and collaboration. The relationship is warm and compelling, with each caring for the other. However, it is conditional based on shared activities or experiences.

Storgê is the Greek word that describes family love. It is a strong emotional relationship between friends or relatives based on mutual attention, without a sexual factor. This term generally describes a parent's love for their child.

Agapé's love is a fraternal, universal, altruistic, spiritual love. He gives himself freely and selflessly without expecting anything in return. It is unconditional and accepts the other as he is, with his qualities and flaws. It wishes for well-being without personal gain. It has compassion for the other and loves him, even if he is not loved by the other. It's an ego-free love that's beyond emotion.

To love another is to cultivate feelings of benevolence and compassion towards him, to recognize his wounds as the origin of deviant actions, and to cultivate non-judgment.

To love is to respect our differences and accept that we are all on the way with degrees of maturity and evolution specific to each one.

So until I understand the nature of my attraction to Kenan, I swear to stay away from him.