Zenitsu Agatsuma : the sad lemonhead

"PLEASE? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE! MARRY ME! I DON'T KNOW WHEN I'LL DIE! SO I WANT YOU TO MARRY ME! PLEASE?" a yellow haired kid screeched.

He was grabbing the girl's arm, and screaming in her ear.

"What the-"

"Hey again tanjiro...who's the lemon head…?"

"I don't know...but...he really seems to be harassing that girl, so i'm gonna do something about it!"

Chirp!

Chirp!

A little sparrow came flying to them

Tanjiro grabbed it in his hands.

It continued to chirp frantically.

"Okay i-"

Hoshi grabbed the lemon head.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD, HARASSING THIS WOMAN?! CAN'T YOU SEE SHE DOESN'T WANT TO MARRY YOU?! THINK OF HER FEELINGS AND NOT YOURS!!" she yelled

Lemon head looked at her.

"WAIT! THAT'S A CORPS UNIFORM!! YOU WERE AT THE FINAL SELECTION!"

"HOW WOULD I REMEMBER A DUMBA** LIKE YOU?!"

"HUUUH?! BUT WE'VE MET! WE'VE MET! YOU WERE WEARING THAT REALLY PRETTY PURPLE HAORI!! THE PROBLEM IS YOUR MEMORY!"

"I-its okay! You can go home now!" Tanjiro said to the girl, as hpshi continued to scream at the lemon head.

Then he noticed the girl walking away.

"HEEEY! THAT GIRL LIKES ME! SHE'S GONNA MARRY ME!"

Then the girl that was going to "marry him" slapped him

"No point now buddy you look weird so now your gonna die alone" Kage said

Tanjiro pulled the girl back

"Calm down!" he said

"WHEN DID I SAY I EVER LIKED YOU?!"

Lemon head started to cry

"YOU WERE CROUCHED AT THE SIDE OF THE ROAD. YOU LOOKED SICK, SO I ASKED YOU IF YOU WERE ALL RIGHT!"

"You didn't come over because you liked me?"

"I'M ALREADY ENGAGED TO SOMEONE, SO DEFINITELY NOT! IF YOU'RE HEALTHY ENOUGH TO HARASS ME, YOU'RE FINE! GOODBYE!"

"WAIT! WAI-"

The girl had run away.

"Man poor dude, he's gonna die alone now"

Lemon head turned to the three of them.

"Why did you interfere? And why are you looking at me like that?!"

Hoshi and Tanjiro grimaced at lemon head while Kage just felt sorry for him.

"WHY ARE YOU STARING AT ME LIKE I'M SOME PITIFUL CREATURE?! STOP IT!! I HOLD YO-"

He pointed at hoshi and stopped speaking.

"Why's he looking at me like that…"

"Buddy, I might have one eye but I think-"

Hoshi covered his mouth

"I know what you're gonna say-"

"R-responsible…" lemon head finally said.

"You shoulda let me keep the bandages…"

"Well, i didn't know there would be a guy like this!!"

"My lord…"

"Have fun"Kage said while eating a sandwich

"Where did you-"

"Don't question it!"

Tanjiro just grimaced at lemon head.

"DON'T STARE AT ME LIKE THAT! SAY SOMETHING!! Im gonna die soon...ON MY NEXT JOB! I'm incredibly weak, so gimme a break…can you guys protect me till i get married?! " lemon head yelled.

"Let's start with introductions! My name is Tanjiro Kamado!"

"I'm Kage Yami, and the girl that' hiding from you is my sister, Hoshi Uchu"

"Dammit kage" hoshi said, as she came out of hiding

"My name is Zenitsu Agatsuma! Please help me!!"

"Okay, what's with all this 'help me' stuff? Didn't you become a swordsman?" hoshi asked

"W-w-well...um…"

"Oh my- i can't with this! Tanjiro or Kage, from now on whenever i ask zenitsu something, you ask for me"

"Got it…"

"A woman tricked me and put me deep in debt! My trainer was an old man who took on that debt! Life became an endless hell of training! It was so bad, I wanted to die! I thought I'd die at the final selection, but I was unlucky...and I survived! Now every day for the rest of my life will be hell! AAAGH! I'M SCARED! TERRIFIED! YAAAAH! WHAT CAN I DO?! HELP MEEEEEEE" zenitsu screeched

"There there, let it all out…" tanjiro said

"Fine, Mr. lemon you can come with us"

.

.

.

"I understand how you feel, but don't upset your sparrow." Tanjiro broke the silence as they were walking towards their next destination.

"Huh? The sparrow is upset? How do you know?"

"Well, it said that you're always like this, so it doesn't want to rush you off into a job. Besides bothering girls, you also snore loudly."

"Chirp!"

"Oh, it's talking!" hoshi said

"Talking?! You understand bird language?! No way, you must be putting me on!" zenitsu yelled

"KAW!! QUICKLY! QUICKLY! TANJIRO AND OTHERS! RUN!"

"GYAAAAAH! IT'S A TALKING CROW!"

Hoshi started to take out her katana.

Kage put the katana back in its handle.

.

.

.

The crew was at a house in the middle of the woods.

"I smell blood…" tanjiro said.

"There's something else too...doesn't smell like anything i've smelled before…" hoshi said.

"What about the sound? Are we going to work together on this?" zenitsu asked

"Sound?"

Tanjiro turned around to find two kids shaking.

"Where did they come from?"

"they look terrified…"

Kage face went blank as he had a flashback

.

.

.

5 years ago.

"Thank you for the food," the three siblings said.

They started to eat.

"..."

"Are we just gonna ignore it?" yuichiro, the eldest twin said

"What?"

"Our parents are dead! We're all alone in this stupid house with no help at all!"

"Yui…"

"DON'T 'YUI' ME!

"Just try to relax, what will screaming do?"

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT EVERYONE WE KNOW WILL THINK WE'RE DEMON CHILDREN!"

"What about that doctor you and mom always went to?"

"The uchu's? That's even worse! They'll throw us out before we even ask!" yuichiro yelled

"How do you know? We've never asked!!" kage said

"hoshi's really nice…" muichiro mumbled

"Maybe she's the only nice one for all we know!" yuichiro yelled.

"Stop! Complaining about everything won't do us any good. All we gotta do is survive for a while…"

.

.

.

"Kage….kage...earth to kage…"

"Huh? Oh, sorry...i was just thinking about something…"

"Hey…what's that sound? It's starting to bug me...and it won't stop. Like a tsuzumi." zenitsu said

"Sound…? What sound?" kage asked

DUN

DUN

DUN

DUN

A man flew out of the window.

And when he fell, blood splattered everywhere.

"DON'T LOOK!" Tanjiro yelled to the siblings.

He ran to the man and asked

"Are you okay?!"

THE DUDE'S BLEEDING AT AN INSANE RATE, TANJIRO, OF COURSE HE'S NOT FINE!!

The man mumbled something but hoshi, nor kage could understand.

"Yeah..no bandage can fix that"

"Rip random man"

Hoshi hit him.

"HE'S DEAD! CAN'T YOU TAKE SOMETHING SERIOUSLY FOR ONCE?!"

"HEY YOU-"

GRAAAAAH!