Chapter 45

Yoongi and Lori have gone off on their own, probably to one of the rooms upstairs or maybe even a private room and Jimin is still kissing the silver fox. It's seems he is enjoying it as he hasn't stopped for the last 10 minutes. I'm distracted by it and Namjoon knows it. I feel bad for him. He has quietly walked into every room with me but hasn't really had my full attention. Even now with Jimin other wise occupied. He whispers in my ear and asks me "what do you want?"

I look at him confused, not sure what he means exactly. "Do you want me? Do you want Jimin? Or do you want us both?" I knew this conversation would have to happen but I wasn't expecting it to be here or right now. "Shall we find a private room upstairs so we can talk?" I ask. He nods and I think Jimin needs to be involved too so I interrupt the conversation he is now having as the kissing has stopped. "Sorry Jimin we need to go and talk, will you come with us please?" I ask and he nods, glances at silver fox and follows me out to the atrium so we can climb the stairs.

Ji-Ho has been following us but keeping a distance and I think Min-Jun must be following Lori and Yoongi as I don't see him. I grab both their hands and we head up to see if their are any private rooms free and thankfully there are. We enter into number 4 on the left hand side of the hall and Ji-Ho stays outside.

"How was your first experience kissing a guy Jimin?" I ask him, unsure of how to exactly broker the conversation that needs to happen. "Oh, that wasn't my first time" he says. "I kissed a boy before in Korea when I was 16. Then I wasn't sure if I liked boys or girls, and I realised I like girls. This time I just wanted to be sure. I still like girls" he says. I feel my tension disappear my selfish desire for him to want me satisfied. "Oh ok, well i'm glad that helped you" I say, trying not to sound too happy.

"Namjoon asked me a question downstairs and it's made me think we need to have a little chat to set some guidelines for whilst you are still in London. I know you asked me to be your girlfriend until you go back to Korea, but then you allowed Namjoon to play with me also. Do you want me all to yourself or do you want to share me with Namjoon?" I ask, trying to make sure I don't lead him into any answers.

"I really like you Aimee, we had fun when we were on our own, and we had fun when we were all together. I am happy for that to happen again" he replies. Ok, now the question is whether or not he is ok with me being with Namjoon without him. "Would you be ok with me and Namjoon being together without you though?" I search his face for any little giveaway to what his answer might be, his face doesn't really give much away. "That would be ok with me" he advises.

I turn to Namjoon and ask him "Do you want anything more to happen between us?" He fixes his eyes on mine and says "yes" I carry on and ask "do you want that to be just us or with Jimin again?" "Just us" he says firmly. "Ok, are you happy for things to still happen between me and Jimin?" I ask finally. "No" he says. "I want you all to myself Aimee, I don't want to share you".

Jimin looks instantly hurt, like he has received a punch in the gut. "Namjoon, we talked about this. You said that it was my decision because I met her first. You said I could decide what would happen between us all" Jimin says to his friend, a slight tremor in his voice from emotion. I don't interrupt them, instead I just listen. "I know what I said Jimin, but that was before and this is now. I'm falling for her here. This feels like more than just a fling for me, i'm not sure you can say the same now".

When things first started to happen with me and Jimin I did want to be swept up and taken back to Korea to be his wife and live happily ever after, but slowly started to think it would be better for both of us if it was less strict and more relaxed, hence why I slept with Namjoon too. Jimin was happy for it to happen, I thought both of them were happy for us all to have some fun before they went back home, and now it feels awkward. I don't want to be the reason for these 2 to fall out. "I really like her too Namjoon, it could be more for me too. I knew I shouldn't have shared her with you, I should have said no, but silly me got swept up in the naughtiness of it all".

They both turn and look at me. Waiting for me to speak, but I can't. I don't want to have to pick between them, that could cause a catastrophic break in their friendship and end up effecting the band. Right now it almost feels like I am going to have to break both their hearts in order to save their friendship.