Chapter 26

We wander around Sainsbury's quickly, picking up stuff to make steak, chips and the trimmings for dinner, some nice ice cream for after, a few beers, a bottle of red and a bottle of white. Jimin is very upset we can't buy Soju in this shop, and texts Ji-Ho asking him to try and find somewhere close that sells it. We spend the longest time in the snack aisles. Crisps, biscuits, chocolate, popcorn and nuts are all thrown in the trolley. We load our stuff on to the conveyor and when it's our turn to be served I do the packing. Jimin pays, again after much protest by me, but I really have no hope trying to convince him my money can be spent too.

When we get back to the car Jimin looks at Ji-Ho and just says "Soju?" Min-Jun shakes his head and they both look defeated. "ttong" Jimin says. I ask what it means and he says "shit". I laugh and tell him we will probably be able to order some on the internet and we can look when we get home.

20 minutes later we wave off our protectors and head into the flat. I put the shopping away and he gets Alexa to play Lori's favourites. It's almost 3pm now and we haven't really eaten so we open one of the large share bags of Doritos and flop on the sofa. I ask him loads of questions about the music he likes to listen to, and he is like me, doesn't have a particular genre he sticks too and likes a little bit of everything. Eclectic is how my Mum always describes me.

I wonder if having to learn songs in English is as hard as it sounds? After all the language is notoriously difficult to learn, especially with all of the multiple meanings of some words. I ask him to choose a song he really likes and he tells me Bird by Ha Sung Woon. We play it and he sings along in Korean. I can't believe how much like a BTS song it sounds. There is clearly a version of music they love to produce over there. I tell him I have listened to some more BTS and that I really like his song Filter. I play it. I explain the guitar sounds amazing, and his beautiful voice is mesmerising. He appreciates it, but looks embarrassed listening to his own work.

To try and ease that I pull him up from the sofa and we dance around the front room to it. He shows off some of his signature moves and I try to keep up. We are laughing and it's so effortless to have fun with him. When it finishes we drop back on the sofa and he asks me for my favourite song. That is a really tough call. I have so many. I finally decide on Ain't no sunshine by Bill Withers. It's one of my Dads favourites and features in Notting Hill. I love the strings, his slow melodic voice and of course the words. He sits quietly and bobs his head to it.

We carry on choosing songs, some he knows, some he doesn't and vice versa, we dance about to the up tempo ones and reflect on the soft and slow ones. Time passes really quickly and we decide to make a start on dinner, well, I do. He watches. I peel and cut potatoes, coat them in oil and put them in the oven, pop some mushrooms in a pan with some butter and garlic and blanch some asparagus. I sear the steaks making sure they have time to rest before I slice them. He looks impressed when I serve it to him at the table. I've made the effort and put out napkins, even lit a candle. I pour some wine and we tuck in.

When we have finished eating and I have cleared up, we move his stuff into what will now be our room. God, i've just said our. That's the first time i'm talking about us as an us. I like it.

I feel like I smell of garlic so I go and have a shower, he joins me. We don't have sex, we just enjoy being together in the soothing down pour of warmth. He washes my back and I could easily get lost in the feel of his fingers. We do kiss, it's really deep and passionate, I touch him on his torso and enjoy the feel of his abs and v lines. It's erotic because it's sexually charged but we are both denying ourselves. Once we are all clean we go in to the bedroom and lay down, and I look into his eyes and I feel brave so I ask "were you planning on sleeping with anyone whilst you were in London?"

He leans up on his elbow and faces me. His face soft and a slight look of amusement on his face. "No I wasn't. I was intending to just make music and leave, but then on my first full day here I walk in to a building and see an angel appear before me. That was it. I needed to know you. I'm so pleased that I found you. You are what I have been needing without even knowing that I needed it". I feel myself well up, and a little tear rolls down my cheek. He wipes it away and pulls me in for a kiss. "I want you to be my girlfriend" he says, his eyes focused on mine, waiting for a response. What do I say? I really want to say yes of course, but I don't want to get swept up, has he considered what happens when he has to go home? I choose to mention that and see how he reacts to it. "I know it would be too much for me to try and whisk you off to Korea with me when I have to leave, but right in this moment I don't want to even think about leaving you. Can we just be together whilst we can for now?"

I look at him and ask how you say yes in Korean, "ye" he replies and then I ask how you say boyfriend, "namja chingu" he says. I push his hair back from his face and say "ye namja chingu" back to him.