Mason Boys

   Mother pulled tightly on each strand of my hair as she weaved it into an intricate braid. The beauty of the braid, with its delicate flowers entwined into its pattern, contrasted the burning sensation of my abused scalp. The flowers were at my request, but Mother says they won't help me be more beautiful. I lost that chance the moment I was born the way I am. I winced as she pulled the last strand at the base of my neck and laced it with a flower. She made a shrewd expression at me through the mirror.

"I'm sure your husband won't be so accepting of such unappealing expressions." She yanked the base of the braid exceptionally hard, making me wince once more.

 I casted my eyes downwards to not meet her cold blue ones in our reflections, hoping my long eyelashes covered the embarrassment behind them. Mother always had taught me and my sisters to keep our expressions calm and submissive. The way I scrunched my nose and pinched my eyebrows every time she braided my hair did me nothing but have her pull on the curls tighter. 

 That was another problem. My curly brown hair. It was wild and hard to maintain which was different from the classic ice-blond hair that my family is known for. (Ice-blond being a rarity itself across Khanaria). Our family is famous for the color and how, no matter who we marry, the color gets passed on to the children. It's always made me feel disgusted how other noble families will line up and try to offer the biggest sum of money just to have a chance to marry one of their daughters or sons to ours. People will pay a pretty penny to be associated with such a mysterious family.

 Father has traveled the world and brought back scientists and doctors to try to explain the phenomena, but to no avail. The hair isn't tied to any sickness nor is it tied to our environment. The biggest mystery is why I was born without it and if this change means an end coming to our legacy. I believe that's mothers worst fear. Change.

 I glanced back up at my mother when she was focused on pinning my hair. There was an expectation that family members who turned out any different (Goddess forbid, Mother says) are expected to work five times as hard for their positions than the others. This sad reality became mine when I had the nerve to be born differently. Except my brown hair means I have to work one thousand times harder. 

 This was why I was in this room almost every day in this stupid chair. Getting my stupid hair braided. I had to look perfect at all times. It was all because I was expected to be married off and mother says no noble in their right mind would look my way if my hair was messy. They already look over me when I'm next to my sisters anyway. It's harder to maintain my hair than the rest of my sisters and so that meant I had to fall victim to mothers unforgiving hair pulling. 

 I didn't let myself think about what my parents would do to me if they couldn't find me a suitor soon enough. Just the thought gave me a shudder which earned me a poke from another pin Mother was putting in my hair. She stepped back from the vanity and signaled for me to stand with her. I took in the state of my hair. My curls came together into one neat braid that was pinned to form a bun at the base of my neck. The bun was too tight, as usual, and I knew I was going to let the braid loose later. Small flowers that I picked out of the garden were weaved all across the bun. Mother said it would be childlike to put a plant from outside into my hair and it would look like I rolled around in the grass. I looked at myself and was pleased despite what she had told me. A smile almost formed upon my lips before one of her lessons came to mind.

 "Never smile too wide or too true. A proper lady of the Vassefor family keeps her expressions in check." 

 Mothers words echoed in my head before I closed my eyes and lightly dipped my chin in a sign of gratitude, keeping my features calm. She let out a small hum which let me know that she saw me catch my own mistake before she had to, which seemed to happen a lot despite my life-long training.

 "Now hurry along. Those books aren't going to study themselves." She shooed me out of her room and the sound of my bare feet echoed throughout our manor as I made my way down its hallways. I stopped when I saw the two grand doors that led to our family library. A wave of warm dusty air hit me when I pushed open the doors, enveloping me in a welcoming manner. I let out a tense breath I didn't know I was holding and closed the doors behind me. I never could truly relax until I was completely out of the presence of my family.

 The library was beautiful and my favorite place to go when I wanted to be alone. There were two spiral staircases on each side of the dome shaped room that led up to another floor. Huge floor to ceiling windows let in natural light. Shelves were packed tight with novels and stories and picture books from all over the world that Father acquired on his journeys. I let the light from the sky light windows soak its warmth into my tan skin before finally smiling. I was safe here.

 My fingers danced in the air above each table of stray books as I strode passed them. I froze and my hand settled on a book about a man who got swallowed by a bird. I've read it a dozen times, but that didn't stop my peaked interest to read it all over again. I flipped to the first page and began reading.

 Mother would usually disapprove of anything of the sorts for any other one of her daughters. She said that the hobby of reading for fun was for men. A maid taught all of us how to read, but mother stressed more on the importance of knitting and cooking. She had the maid be especially hard on me in hopes that the more skills I acquired, the more desirable I'd be for any suitor who would ever look my way, because somehow without those skills I'd be worth nothing standing next to my sisters.

 Cooking, cleaning, knitting, dancing, singing, and painting were the important hobbies of a woman, she said. Book smarts and math were for men for whatever reason. When mother was too focused on her other daughters, which were obviously significantly more important, I was allowed this simple pleasure. It's not like it mattered anyway. I was never meant to be anyone important. I was the ruined daughter of the Vassefor family. Though this title sounded horrific in name, I believe it came with perks such as the bit of freedom I get when I'm inevitably overlooked.

 I perched myself on the railing on the second floor. Some of my hair started to frizz as I rested my head on the window. I hated when Mother put the braid in a bun. It was always tight and uncomfortable. I unpinned the bun and my braid fell down my back. A few minutes went by and I was finally starting to get into the part in the book where the man meets the fox in the bird's stomach. That's when I heard soft laughter from outside. I peered down out the window and saw two of my sisters, Lydia and Lindsey, racing across the field with a few boys. My eyes widened when I saw exactly who the boys were. Father and Mother would kill my sisters if they saw them fiddling around with the Mason boys. I knew that sometimes they snuck off and hung out with them in the village after hours, but so close to the house? They've never been so stupid.

 My eyes couldn't help but linger on Ethan, the middle child of the Masons, and the way that the strong winds caressed his light brown hair. I've never seen a man so perfect. I didn't know exactly who I was going to be married to, but I let a secret hope flutter in my stomach that it would be Ethan. He fit the description for who my parents would allow me to marry. My cheeks started to burn at the thought of Ethan as my husband. Great Goddess of Khanaria, that'd be a dream come true. As they got closer a small satisfied smile appeared on my lips as I saw the way his dark blue eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled that perfect smile. A smile and eyes I wish were for only me instead of Lindsey. My smile disappeared when I saw her return a smile of her own.

 If I said I wasn't jealous of Lindsey, or any of my sisters, I'd be lying. A younger housemaid around my age told me that it would only make sense for me to be jealous of them. The women in our family are known throughout the land for their beauty. But beauty can be found everywhere in all different types of women. So of course we're known for the one feature that makes us stand out from the rest of the beautiful women: Our hair, which is rarer than a pearl. Brown, black, ginger and sometimes even dark dirty blond was normal. In any other family, I would've been considered beautiful and maybe even been treated better, but in this household it was different. Their pride was set in what made them more beautiful than the "normal" beautiful woman, and I didn't have that feature. 

 "So you're not ugly," the maid said, "you're just not exceptional." She then laughed and went on saying that there are plenty of pretty women who work at whorehouses and that I should consider it since no one wants a Vassefor girl with brown hair. My sisters giddily laughed along, encouraging the housemaid when they're instead expected to strike anyone who speaks out their place against our family. But I guess I've never really been considered to deserve the same respect as the others.

 I couldn't stand up for myself that day and the memory made my face grow red in shame. Instead of putting her in her place like I'm expected to do, I just walked away. Sometimes I wish I would've just struck her down and watched my sisters stand there in shock. I sighed and closed my book. No matter how much I wish I would've done that, I know I could never put my hands on anyone.

 I thought about our older brother, Louis, and how he would stand up for me when I was younger. He'd stop my sisters from picking on me and he told me that I was still beautiful. When I was nine he decorated my hair in small white flowers like the ones I had today and told me that I looked like a goddess. A goddess of flowers. Even though the rest of our family made me feel like nothing, Louis would always treat me with the same respect as the others.

 I smiled harder at the memory, but the smile left just as fast as it came because it also reminded me Louis was gone. The only person that cared for me abandoned me here and left me to the vultures that I have to call family. He got out while he could and I couldn't blame him, but it didn't change the anger I had towards him for leaving me here. I found myself wondering again where he went off to and how busy he could possibly be to not be able to send a letter. All he left was the silver necklace I was wearing and a note apologizing. 

 My attention snapped back to the scene outside my window. The sound of their laughter calmed down the closer my sisters and the boys came to the manor. Lydia smoothed the wrinkles in her skirts and the frizz in her hair before opening the front door. Lindsey gave Ethan a mischievous smirk and a glance that lingered longer than I deemed lady-like before following her sister into the house. I almost dropped my book when I saw that the boys followed after them. Why did they just walk through our front door? What was going on? 

 It's not uncommon for other noble families to visit from time to time, but Father didn't like visitors and Mother didn't like seeing us hanging near the boys unless it was a professional meeting and deemed absolutely necessary. I almost fell off the railing trying to get down the stairs. I checked my hair in a desk mirror on my way out and quickly sighed in distaste at the frizzy state of it before running out the door. The closer I got to the sound of voices down the hallways, the more self aware I got. My dress was a simple white one without the layers of the dresses we usually wear when going out. With the one layer of skirts and thin spaghetti strap top, the dress could barely qualify as undergarments. I touched at the flowers in my hair that felt out of place even though I couldn't see them and straightened my bralette. 

Even though this outfit is appropriate to wear in the house, I knew Mother would have a fit if she saw me wearing something so revealing in the company of other nobles. I slowed down my steps as I came up to the dining room and peered around the corner to look inside. Father was leaning against the wall talking to Lydia, my eldest sister, while the others were talking in the corner on the opposite side of the room, though a bit more formal in the presence of my father. 

 Now that I was paying attention, I could see that the boys were wearing their fine coats. I looked at my sisters and also noticed that they were wearing their best dresses. Lindsey was wearing her gray-blue dress with a white bow tied around the waist that complimented her eyes. Her ice-blond hair was twisted up into a tight bun that lifted her features. She looked beautiful, as always. Lydia's gown was a burgundy color that looked like it was washed so many times it was grayish, but I'm sure that was its intended color. It complimented the pinkish undertones of her skin. 

 I furrowed my eyebrows after looking at Lydia. Her face was redder than usual. I squinted and saw tears streaming down her cheeks as she explained something frantically to father. I had never seen Lydia cry before. This was a first. Father kept sighing and nodding his head in understanding. He looked stressed as he ran his fingers through his thick head of hair. The signature color of the family filled the spaces between his fingers. 

"And what do you think you're doing, Louise?" A voice boomed from behind me.

 I jumped, startled. I knew who that snooty little voice belonged to before I even turned to see. I rolled my eyes before I even saw her. I turned around and saw my little sister standing before me. 

"I was seeing what all the commotion was about, just as I believe you were doing?" I questioned her and raised an eyebrow as I looked her over. Lana had to be the most expressive one out of all four of us. Both with her outer appearance and with her words.

Lana's hair was pulled up into two pigtails. Her white ringlets laid across her shoulders and were decorated with little gold strings that were curled in the same shape of her hair. Her gown for the evening was duel colored. One half was a deep royal purple. The fabric on the purple side was a thick satin. The other half of the dress was bright yellow and was made from layers of georgette. The yellow georgette stretched to the purple side of the dress and was tied into a large bow. Her white frill socks went up to her knees and had little matching yellow bows on them. Where was she getting the funds for these outfits? I was barely allowed to get two coins for sweet bread when I wanted it. Lana was a spoiled girl.

 She caught my gaze and grinned with pride, "You like? I had the maid take me to the far side of the village to get the fabric." She went to the village? Well It had been quiet all day. That makes sense. She held the sides of her dress and twirled to give me a full view. She then started ranting about how the colors complemented each other and she knew this because one of Father's work friends was a famous artist who told her so. I'm sure she went on talking about how she was now a piece of art or something. I didn't listen too much before dazing out. If you gave this little girl an audience, she'd talk from sun up to sun down. I was about to walk away before she snapped her fingers in my face.

"Earth. To. Louise. I swear there are no brains in that brunette head." She rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" I spat out as kindly as I possibly could. Last time that I was "mean" to Lana, Father striked me once for every mean word I said to her. She had cried to him as if me calling her spoiled truly hurt her feelings, but I saw her face that day as he had striked me. Her grin grew wider and wider with each time his hand connected with my face.

"Is that what you're wearing to the Mason's house?" She scrunched her nose in distaste. 

"What!? What do you mean?" I shook my head in confusion.

"What? What do you mean?" Lana mocked me and stuck her tongue out. "You're always in a state of stupor. You never know what's going on."

"Lady Louisiette!" A passing maid looked absolutely horrified as she scurried up to us. "Lady Louisiette, forgive me, I've been looking for you for the past two hours. We must get you dressed. Please come now to your room before your mother throws a fit." 

"What? What are we getting dressed for?" She didn't answer my question, but took my hand and practically dragged me across the manor towards my room.

 She slammed the door behind us once we entered my room and started going through my closet. I sat down on the bed, confused as she started rambling.

"We won't have time to do your hair. It takes so much effort. Oh goddess, let's hope your mother forgives me. I need this job. I have to feed my family. Little Johnny is so sick we barely can afford a doctor-'' She pulled out a gray dress and a black ribbon before continuing, "You know the last doctor who saw him said he might be crippled for the rest of his life."

 When she turned around her wide eyes looked over the state of my hair. "What were you doing, Lady Louisiette? Rolling around in a field?" She shook her head and quickly made her way towards me. 

 I sighed and stood and started undressing myself. I stayed quiet as the maid made more negative comments about my appearance as she dressed me. She then sat me down at my vanity and quickly did my makeup. There was only enough time for her to stain my lips, put light powder underneath my eyes, and blush my cheeks. Mother always told me makeup wouldn't help much. I still stand out from my sisters and not in a good way. When we were finished I looked at myself in my mirror. The small white flowers in my hair threw off the gray dress, but I didn't have time to change my hair. I could've taken them out, but it was a small way for me to show I don't care what everyone else thinks. Yes, to others it might seem as though I rolled around a field, but I personally thought they were beautiful.

 After giving me a black pair of shoes to put on, she quickly ushered me back into the hallway. "Now hurry along to the carriage. Everyone is probably already ready to go." She curtsied to me before continuing, "Please send your mother my apologies. I did the best I could and I hope she finds you presentable enough for the duke."

 We're seeing the Duke!? I would've cared a bit more about my appearance if I knew where we were going. I started to walk away, but stopped to turn around. I tipped my head towards her, "Thank you Ruth. Your kindness to me is greatly appreciated." She looked taken back. The reason may be because nobles barely bother to learn their staff's names. I made an effort to learn every staff member's names. Ruth was just hired a few months back which meant she wasn't used to the custom of picking on me because I was different. To Ruth, I was just like any other noble and so she treated me like one. She didn't know how much I truly appreciated that.

 I stepped out of the front door to see a butler helping my sisters into the carriage while the coachman was adjusting the reins on the horses. Beside our carriage was another one. My heart almost dropped when I saw Ethan talking to the coachman for his carriage. The sun was going down and the golden light better emphasized his features. I almost forgot what was going on as I watched him talk. 

 The sunlight made his brown hair and eyes look golden. He rubbed the stubble along his chin and it made me want to trace my fingers along his cheek down to his jawline- and wow those lips. My fingers made their way to my own lips as I thought about how his would feel. At this moment I felt like there was no need for Ruth to put blush on my cheeks because I felt them heat as I stared at the way his dark blue vest hugged his chest. Please, great goddess, let this man be my husband. His eyes met mine for a quick second which brought me back to reality. Did he catch me staring? My thoughts were interrupted by the butler who stepped into my view.

"Lady Louisiette, may I?" He bowed and held out his hand to help me into the carriage.

I nodded. "I'm sorry. I don't want to hold us up." 

He responded in a low voice that sounded almost irritated, "I'm afraid you already did."

 I didn't know what to say so I just said "Oh." before stepping into the carriage. Mother shook her head and groaned. "The flowers, Louisiette? They are inappropriate for a formal meeting. Who was your maid for the evening? It's that new lady, right?" She continued when I didn't answer, "I'll have a word with her later."

I shook my head in protest, "Oh no, Mother. It was my fault. I was in the library for longer than permitted. She was looking for me and did the best she could with the time she had."

Mother lifted her chin up and looked down at me, "She didn't help much."

I inhaled deeply. Taking the shot at my appearance with dignity. The ache in my chest that comes with Mother's little comments has grown smaller with each time she says something. But no matter how many times she pokes at me, the pain I feel is still there. For some reason deep down I still expect her to treat me with the same love as she does her other children. Even though she's made it clear that she never will.

 For the entire ride I tried my best to ignore my family and ignore the weird fact that Father wasn't accompanying us. It's seen as weird for the women of a noble family to travel without being accompanied by the man of the house. I guess that's why the Mason sons came and escorted us back to their residence.

 The ride would be an hour and I couldn't help but to feel restless waiting for us to get to our destination. I wanted to be invisible. Even though no one was talking to me, I couldn't help but feel their unapproving stares here and there. Their burning gazes made me shift uncomfortably back and forth in my seat. No sitting position could save me from their hate.

 Finally I couldn't take it anymore, so I peered out the curtain and looked up at the full moon. It was a white void in a pitch black sea of unknown wonders. The stars were covered by foggy clouds, so she was the lead lady of the show. Her light casted down over the passing trees, providing barely enough light for me to see the path we were on. I stared at it and the sound of Lana, Lydia, and Lindsey's voices started to fade out.

 Father once told us about a culture from across the sea that believed in a moon goddess. He said it is believed that the moon goddess blesses the women across the land with fertility, wealth, and good fortune. I read about the religion and though I didn't know whether or not this moon goddess was real, I closed my eyes and silently prayed for a good marriage to Ethan. 

 "And may our children love themselves no matter what they look like." I smirked as I finished off my prayer in my head. My moment of tranquility came to a quick and sudden end as the carriage halted to a stop. My eyes fluttered open and I turned to meet Lydia's hard gaze. I could tell her face had more layers of powder on it than usual, but it couldn't hide the dark circles underneath her eyes. The moonlight on her usually lively skin made it instead look pale. The shadows casted on her face looked almost ghostly. Confusion seeped through me as emotion flickered in her eyes. Pity? Wait no, relief? A mix of both? I didn't know, but it surely was a look that I've never seen her give me before.

 "Finally!" Lana exclaimed which snapped me and Lydia out of our staring contest. She leaned over to me and whispered, "Try not to mess this up for once in your life." She giggled before hopping out of the carriage. Lindsey and Lydia followed soon after, Lydia doing so after sparing me one more glance.

 Mother grabbed my wrist before I could step out. Her thin fingers dug into my flesh and a small cry escaped my lips. She yanked me down to her, bringing us closer than we've been in years. Her eyes bore into mine as she gave me a warning, "Stay about yourself tonight. Remember that you are lucky that any family would take you in and you are blessed to be accepted into such an amazing family. No matter in which shape or form."

 Her words burned into my mind the entire way into the manor. Even the way Ethan slid his jacket off and ran his fingers through his glorious hair didn't catch my attention the way it usually does. "No matter in which shape or form." What did this mean? What possible form could I be accepted into the Masons family?