DID I MAKE YOU CRY?

SHADE.

I didn’t realized how much the decision I took was going to affect me until when I got out of his car.

My mom was happy that I was home but she didn’t know what really happened , I try faking a smile but tears were building up in my eyes, I look at the ATM card in my hand and tears dripped down my face  and my mom came behind me.

“You didn’t even call to tell me you were coming , I would have cooked something for you and why didn’t your fiancée wait.

“He has something to do at work and I was missing home and everyone that was why I came back home “ I said and enter into the bedroom and I burst into tears, I am missing him.

I just wish his mom was never an obstacle in this relationship, we were perfect but she just hate me for no reason.

I hear footsteps coming towards the room and it was my siblings and my cellphone rings, it was a video call from Kunle.

I picked my call and starring at him on the video and tears rolled down my eyes and I breathe out air and I walk out of the bedroom and go to the backyard , even tears kept falling off his eyes.

“I am back home , in case you change your mind , you can always tell me because I won’t stop begging you to come back” he said.

“I ha..a.. ven’t change my mind” I replied stammering.

“It’s fine,I just want to see that beautiful face and hear your beautiful voice again, the house is empty  without you, I feel so weak right now because my strength is gone out of this house and se has refuse to stay, I love you Shade and will always love you and no one will ever take your space in my heart.

Tears rolled down my eyes and I cry out, I didn’t know my mom was at the door step to the backyard, it was when I heard her voice that I realized that she was behind me , I quickly dry my tears and I turn back smiling at my mom.

My  mom moves closer to me and she look at me closer and she asks me.

“Have you been crying? What happened? My tears were building up again and I quickly look down and close my eyes and I manage to dry my tears , my mom bends her head trying to catch a glimpse of what is happening to me but I managed to push back the tears .

But you know mothers , you can lie easily to them, she caught me.

“Your red eyes, your face are swollen? She became worried, I can read her worriness on her face.

“You can confide in me” she says and held my hand and she lead me to the bench at the backyard.

“Is there something you are not telling me? My mom asks.

“Ofcourse no, I ……I ….am fine” I said and she look into my eyes.

“be honest with me “she says.

I couldn’t look at my mom’s eyes and lie to her, I have been lieing from the start of all of this mess and I am still lying to her., I know this is very bad of me but I love Kunle than to make my mom think ill of him and my mom has been through a lot than for us than to give her a sudden high blood pressure.

If I tell her the truth that everything so far is fake my mom will have an heart attack anf I will never forgive myself if anything happens to her.

I just want she and my sibling and I to live better, we need to prove Dad wrong that we did it witout him even though he hasn’t been that responsible father.

“I don’t believe you, I know something is eating you up, even if it is the worst thing on this earth that has happened to you, I won’t scream or yell at you” she says.

Mothers, you cannot really compare them to any human on earth, no one can ever be like your mom although there are some irresponsible mothers too but they are few unlike fathers and I have seen good father’s too that makes you wish you had a father and ,makes you want to keep celebrating fathers day always but that isn’t the case of my dad, I can celebrate mothers day every day in a year but not Father’s day, I really wish my father was like some fathers out there but I am glad God bless us with both mother and father in one body.

She knows when I am worried, crying even when I am lying, I know she only accepted but she isn’t convince about the whole thing , my cover up , she kept looking into my face but I was sobbing but trying  not to let my tears fall of my eyes.

Since you said you are fine , I will accept that half way “ she says coldly and slowly and she stood up beside me and when she got to the doorstep, she came back to me.

“Or did you have a fight with your fiancée? She asks me and I stare at her , I paused before answering.

“No” I answered coldly and she smile.

“Listen dear, I do not know what kind of issue both of you have, every relationship is bound to have misunderstanding and if there is understanding, trust and faith you will solve it and in every relationship dear tolerance is needed and the magic word I am sorry, accepting one’s mistake is really important dear” she says and I didn’t says a word, I just embrace her.

“Daddy never know your worth mom but I do, my siblings do and we will make you proud” I said.

“You are already making me proud, look at the suitor you came home with , no one expected it , I know if your father had forseen such future he wouldn’t have left and I wouldn’t have know what he was capable of doing” she says.

“Let’s go and eat, your siblings must be hungry” she says and we go into the house.

My mom dished the food and I couldn’t eat mine , I just kept moving my spoon on my food because I had been used to eating with him on the dinning, I miss us eating together, I missed him piling up my food into my plate.

PEJU.

I never knew Simisola’s mom knew we were having an affair, it all started when I got this job five months ago, Working with Simisola’s mom could be tedious and stressful, she isn’t nice at all.

Getting this job is such a Miracle because I had given up on searching for work infact I was of asking  one of my school mate  to introduce me to one of his sugar daddies which I don’t even know if she will introduce me to any, I just want to give a try.

I was on my way to my friends place that I got a message alert on my broken screen phone. I manage to open the mail because the screen was even stiffing.

I open my mail, before even opening the mail , it was serious battle , I had to reboot my cellphone several  times,.

Finally I was able to open my mail and when I open the mail, it was an offer as a PA. I was so happy, I turn back and rush into the house happily, my mom has gone for her usual cleaner job in a private school that pays the worst salary ever Twelve thousand naira and My dad is a Security in a company where he earns Thirty Five Thousand Naira, to be honest my Parent are trying but things are not just getting anyway better, They did their best to send me to school till university, I know how many times my parent have to starve to send me to school, one of my siblings have to stop school so that I will finish my university then I will get a job to support them. I was happy when I finish my university and serve in the NYSC, because in Nigeria, you get to serve the nation for one year after school before being able to work.

All my allowee, I mean allowance was what I use in supporting my parent for one year, I had friends who were retain at the companies or school they served but they didn’t get there by merit, they got there by using what they have to get what they want, what I meant is they had to sleep with the people at the top or have them has sugar daddies , some even turn lesbians to be retain where they served.

I had many advances but I said I will never open my legs to get job, that my job will come naturally but it wasn’t easy most especially when I see my mates using Iphones, latest dresses and some even driving car.

I had checked almost all the job websites, when I apply it is either they say they will get back to me or I won’t get response.

I even thought of going for Cabin crew training , there was no money to go for that , I tried going around to find job , they will interview me at the they will offer less that Twelve thousand.

I took up a private school teacher job, I never got a complete salary for good four month, I have to quit the job.

Then when I got tired of everything, my brother that stop for me because I gained admission into the university couldn’t go to school , he had to go had learn Barbing.

It breaks my heart whenever I see him struggling to even go and learn this work because hit wasn’t his choice, I feel bad inside of me that I cost him a lot ,sometimes I use to think that maybe if he had gone to school, he might be easy for him to get a job, sometimes I just think stupidly and think of ending it all.

I had given up after two years of job hunt until I got that message from the website that I put in for job, infact it’s been more than seven month I apply for a PA job in a company before that day.

I was happy, I rush home, no one was home , I quickly struggle to send my reply on my phone that was hanging because of the broken screen. I send message to the company and I got reply immediately unlike the one’s I won’t get response or they will tell me “we will get back to you”.

I was so happy at first and I gave it a second thought maybe they are scammers because I have been a victim of that twice that you will think you have gotten a job and boom they will start advertising and they will collect money from you.

But I gave myself courage and have it in mind that it can be a fifty percent chance, I do not even have a dress that I can wear except for my worn out and faded gown that my friend dashed me during NYSC because it didn’t fit her body, she is a plumpy person while I am not tall and kind of slim, the cloth could only fit me and that is how I was able to get it and as for my shoe , I bought it from second hand store and it is even outdated and as for my hair, I had it barb by my brother because I cannot maintain my hair but it really look fit.

The company sent me their address because they are the one that will interview me.

The following day , I quickly dress up in my worn out and faded gown and my shoes that I am praying not to disgrace because the sole has opened a bit.

I took my siblings Vaseline and rub it on my hair and I comb it  so that my hair will be shinning.I use water to clean my shoe to make it shinning and my hand bag which was already peeling off already.

I turn the part that has been peeling off from my bag to my side so that no one will notice that it is already peeling off.

When I got to the job agency company they look at me from head to toe and I know it’s because of my dressing .

I was interviewed and I passed the interview after some time, they decided and gave me the address to the mansion.

I look at the money with me it would take me there but I won’t be able to return home .

I stood on the road for about twenty minutes before resolving to going there by bus or by tricycle while I will trek it from one place to another 

I  quickly pick a bike to the estate gate , I told them that I am going to Simi’s mom, I told them I had an appointment with her.

They made a call to Simi’s mom and she tell them to let me in.

I entered into the estate and I was marvel, I kept looking from one place to the other until I got to the gate and that was when I looked back and realize it was the house that started from beginning of the entrance till almost half of the street, I knock on the gate and A man came to open the gate for me, he didn’t open I guess he put a call through to Simi’s mother and he opens the Gate and let me in. I walked from one gate to the other until the fourth gate, I was dazed at the compound and when I saw the mansion, It was a magnificent building , a kind of house that I use to watch and think of that someday I will leave there.

I stood and didn’t know if to enter into the house or not and Simi came out and he stood staring at me from head to toe.

I greeted him and all he could do was to burst into laughter. I was pissed off  and blame myself for greeting him. Tears build up in my eyes because I felt hurt that I greeted him and he burst into laughter.

I wanted to ask him of his mom but I didn’t want to and I needed this job badly.

“Are you one of the new maids? Tears rolled down my cheek because I easily get emotional, I was about to answer that I am the newly employed personal assistant but instead , I teared up and I heard something like.

“Did I make you cry because I laughed?