Hidden

Tom emptied the bag on the couch. It had contained a small tiara, a gleeming golden cup, a bejewelled locket, a ring, and a small book that looked a lot like Harry's diary. He recognized the items immediately and gaped.

"Your other horcruxes?"

Tom shook his head. "No. Replicas."

"Replicas?"

"Yes. As soon as we believe Dumbledore might have an idea of what you are, our first move will be to replace all my horcruxes before he goes looking for them. These are exact replicas – I commissioned them last year – that have been infused with my own magic and warded the same way my horcruxes are. Dumbledore won't be able to tell the difference."

Harry's eyes glimmered. "Brilliant!"

"Yes, I thought so too."

"Wait, though, if they were commissioned, that means that someone else made them, right?"

Tom quirked an eyebrow. "That is what commissioned meant, last I checked."

"You trusted someone with your fake horcruxes?" Harry asked incredulously.

"It was a goblin who was interested in making some...less than legal investments. I placed him under the imperius curse to be safe."

"But...you can't keep him like that forever, right? It would have been draining your magic, all this time," Harry said, suddenly feeling a bit bad for Tom.

"That's why I killed him once he was finished."

Harry grimaced. He didn't feel bad for Tom anymore. "Anyway, are we going to replace them now?"

"No – doing so will expend a significant amount of our time and energy, and may needlessly draw attention to the locations my horcruxes are hidden in. There is also the issue of where to re-hide my horcruxes once we replace them. We will not perform the switch until it is necessary, preferably after we have the chance to inform my master soul of the change."

"So, what are we going to do with them in the meantime?"

"Hide them, here. We'll place them in inconspicuous places around Miss Jenkins's house. They are charmed to repel muggles, but I will compel her to stay away from them nonetheless."

"And what if she moves, or something?"

"Do you think me incapable of persuading a muggle to stay in one place, Harry?"

"Right. So...where do we hide them?"

Tom sat down on the couch beside his fake horcruxes.

"I'll leave that to you."

Harry's eyes bugged out. "...me? You want me to hide them?"

Tom glared at him impatiently. "That's what I just said."

Harry nodded dumbly.

"Well, get to it."

Harry frowned. Where does one hide fake horcruxes? Somewhere inconspicuous, he supposed. The diary was easy – he just placed it at the back of one of Miss Jenkins's bookshelves. The others, though...they would take some thought.

Cautiously, he picked up the cup and headed toward the kitchen. Cups belong in kitchens, right? He just had to find the other cups.

Harry knew from experience that people only put cups in the cupboards above the counters, not the ones below, so he wasted no time in pulling up a chair to the kitchen counter so he could climb up and start looking for the cups. After a few moments of searching he finally found the shelf with all the wine glasses. Carefully, he pulled four of them out, shoving the replica of Hufflepuff's cup to the back and replacing the wine glasses in front of it.

Having finished hiding the cup, he made his way back to the den to find Tom still sitting on the couch, reading Harry's new copy of Magick Moste Evile.

"I hid it behind the wine glasses," Harry commented as he picked up Slytherin's locket and Tom's family ring.

"Hmm."

Harry rolled his eyes and went off to find Miss Jenkins's bedroom, which ended up being at the end of the hall opposite to the kitchen. He knew exactly what to look for – Miss Jenkins's jewellery box. Jewellery boxes, Harry had learned while cleaning Aunt Petunia's bedroom when he was six, were where women kept their small and shiny possessions (namely, jewellery) and cigarettes they weren't supposed to be smoking. Like Aunt Petunia's jewellery box, Miss Jenkins's was filled with earrings and rings and necklaces, and Harry placed the ring and the locket at the very bottom, where they (hopefully) wouldn't be disturbed by Miss Jenkins. Satisfied with his work, Harry trotted back into the den, where Tom was still reading his birthday present.

"I need to hide the diadem now," Harry said, "I don't know where to hide it, though. It's rather conspicuous, don't you think?"

Tom blatantly ignored him.

Harry huffed, picking up the diadem, freezing for a moment to relish the way the dark magic it was infused with licked at his fingers.

Where does one hide a diadem in a school teacher's house? Harry wasn't even close to sure. He pursed his lips as he entered Miss Jenkins's bedroom once again, and started searching.

He tried the closet, first, but only found more polka-dotted dresses and silky dress shirts. He tried the bed-side table too, and under the bed and the bookshelf. No luck; no ideas.

Starting to get frustrated, he turned his attention to the dresser, and began to search it top to bottom. The first drawer that he searched was full of thin, lacy clothing, which, Harry realized upon further inspection, were actually underclothes. Miss Jenkins's bras and...panties, if he understood correctly. Harry imagined that Miss Jenkins probably used this drawer regularly, so that was out of the question. The next one was filled with socks, and the one after that with shirts, and the one after that with pants.

By the time he reached the last drawer, he was starting to feel rather desperate; luckily, fifth time was the charm. When he opened the drawer, it took him a moment to realize what it was he had found. Upon closer inspection of the mass of glittery, sequined clothing shoved in the drawer, though, he realized what they were – costumes. Perfect, he thought. A diadem is just the sort of thing someone would expect to find in a costume.

When he returned to the den, he had a victorious look on his face.

"I've successfully hidden all of the horcruxes -"

He didn't get a chance to finish his sentence, though, before he fell to his knees, letting out a muffled shriek as he saw Miss Jenkins's form go limp on the couch.

Honestly, this is how Tom repays him for his efforts. Sometimes he felt so unappreciated.

.....

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