Why Did You Leave?

Mid-day I eventually woke up with the curtains shut, door closed, light off and Xi not in the bed with me. I panicked a little, not knowing what would happen, it scared me I ended up freaking out not being able to see. Even though it was mid-day and the sun was out it was super dark and being left alone was painful. So many questions.. What if she left me? I started crying a little while I kept questioning everything. Why am I so sensitive? Than the door opened slowly and quietly while my thoughts drowned out all of the noise. Someone walked over to the bed asking "Are you okay?" it was Xian, why did she leave? I looked up at her crying "Why did you leave me?" she than looked worried and said "Oh I'm sorry! I went to prepare you food before you woke up. I didn't know you would cry." I than looked away saying "I'm sorry... I shouldn't of been crying for nothing anyway..." I than went near her and hugged her as she placed down the silver tray of food and hugged me back. "Are you okay?" she asked. I replied saying "I'm fine..." I wanted to stay like that for awhile. Being embraced with someone felt nice. No one ever hugged me when I was younger or wanted to be my friend, does she see me as a friend? Or nothing at all... Am I worthless to her? I don't know... I can't think... Why won't these thoughts go away? Does she actually hate me? Should I leave her be and never return? I know I wouldn't like that but what if she would prefer me gone. What if I'm a nuisance? What if I'm a burden? I don't want to leave her, but what if it makes her happy? I would like to see her happy. I've taking a liking to her, she's not like other people I've met she actually cares. I think? I don't know...