46

Existential 3

We all watched with fascinated horror as a yellowish brown goop appeared to spread from Amy's fingers. As it moved, everything that was caught in it dissolved and became a part of it. The insects, the eggs, the wood chips all got subsumed into the goop until the entire container was just a vomit-coloured slurry.

And if dissolving living matter into slime was disgusting, that wasn't nearly as nauseating as watching a body grow out of it. I instantly understood why people might fear capes like her; never mind her being as powerful as she was. Bones, organs, muscles, skin; all of it simply grew and assembled itself before my eyes. Amy wasn't growing a human from embryo to adulthood at an accelerated rate, she was assembling a fully-grown adult human from parts.

Oh, and it was a bloody mess. If watching surgery made anyone squeamish, this was a thousand times worse. Even me, with a fair amount of medical experience, felt grossed out by the process. I'd seen plenty of bodies from the inside out using my bots, but that was always inside whole human beings. Not a collection of organs just floating there. Even working with cadavers in the morgue wasn't as bad; at least those bodies were cold and unmoving. These organs… wiggled.

To keep the organs alive as she formed them, Amy had to make sure blood was circulating. And since the body's internal circulatory system was naturally the easiest way to move the goopy slurry stuff around, she had built the heart first. As the yellow goop got converted partly to blood, its hue changed into an ugly reddish-orange colour. And since the organs didn't have a completely closed circulation loop while they were forming, they squirted some of the not-quite-blood substance out with every heartbeat.

And the movement. Ugh, the movement. The way the organs wiggled around as they grew, partly from the beating heart, partly from their own growth pushing against each other. The intestines were the worst, folding and flopping as they kept getting longer and longer. And the lungs, looking as soft as a balloon being inflated just before being covered up by an extending ribcage…

It was a bit icky.

Colin, at least, was pretty clinical about it; I think Elena and Lisa had to look away until the skin managed to cover everything.

That being said, it was still not a pretty sight with the cranium and spinal cord being completely open. I used my bots and lodged the whole central nervous system in there. Now I could see, at the microscopic level, where Amy was modifying certain nerve cells that could interface with the my bots. She created some additional glands and hormone receptors that my bots alone couldn't do; attaching the final pieces to make sure the brain interfaced with the body. Several layers of brain-casing closed up and cerebrospinal fluid suspended the artificial organ, while blood vessels grew in the gaps. I could already detect oxygen and glucose being fed to them.

Nearly everything closed up, except for the ports we left behind the ears where the machine interface would connect. Bone and skin grew around it all, finally securing everything in place.

"Do you think Dragon would object if we gave her horns and scales? Maybe a fire-breathing organ?" Lisa joked when she noticed all the internal organs were properly covered up.

Amy rolled her eyes, but looked like she was considering it for just a second. However, the skin was normal, and so was the hair. She made a person who was essentially the same as Dragon's avatar. Dragon always used the image of a vaguely early-thirties woman of a very average, indiscernible ethnic background. She basically created a difficult-to-place average human that could have been anything from a light-skinned Egyptian to a tanned German, facial features being possibly half-Filipino half-Greek or something. Nobody could really tell, which I guess was the point.

"Don't stare, Colin," Elena said, covering his eyes.

"I was just ensuring that – "

"It's bad form to stare at a naked unconscious lady. Very bad form. Go away until we tell you to come back in," Lisa said, pushing him out of the room.

"Let's double check all the connections first before we wake her up," I said to Amy. "I'm moving the right arm."

Dragon's right arm wiggled. "Check," Amy said.

"Left arm."

"Check."

"Touching each fingertip."

"Check."

"Taking a deep breath."

"Wait, make her cough a few times instead," Amy said. "Forgot to clear the airway."

Dragon's body coughed as commanded, and more yellowish fluid sputtered out of her mouth. Lisa helped wipe it away from her mouth.

"Well, we know that works at least," I said. "Lisa, peel back her eyelids for a sec."

I saw the occipital lobe fire off a bit more as light entered Dragon's freshly-made eyeballs.

"Vision seems to be working. I think touch and hearing are fine, too."

"Biologically, she's finished. We can take her body out of the box and get her on something more comfortable."

I had a swarm of nanobots come in to form a body-contoured bed. Elena lifted the body gently with her forcefields, even using many of them to scrape away the excess goop before setting Dragon down. I had no idea her force field control was so precise. She also covered up Dragon the same way she did her own cape costume, until I covered her up using a nanobot-made gown.

"Colin! You can come back in!" Lisa shouted. He came running as soon as he heard.

"Are we ready to, uh, boot her up?" Amy asked.

I nodded.

At first, there was no movement.

Then, her eyelids fluttered. Then her limbs twitched. Her heart rate rose, her breathing became erratic, and her whole body started convulsing.

And just like that, she fell unconscious again.

"Taylor! What happened to her?" Amy cried out. "All I could see was a massive spike her stress hormones. Adrenaline flooded her body."

"I had to bring her back down into a coma," I said. "Sorry. I think it was just sensory overload, it was like having a seizure. She's not used to having a body. I'll numb the sensations from her body and try again."

This time, it went a little smoother. Dragon opened her eyes again, but didn't move. It looked like she figured out blinking well enough. I gave her control of her face, though I was still blocking most of the input from the skin and most things from the neck down.

"Dragon? How are you doing?" Lisa asked.

Dragon seemed to figure out the mechanics of moving her eyeballs now. And her hearing was working, so she looked at Lisa. Her neck was still mostly paralyzed, but I gave her conscious control of breathing and the vocal cords.

"Aaaaah… aaaa…aaaaooowwaaaa…." Dragon was making random noises, barely more than loud exhales.

"She's feeling some apprehension and fear, but she recognizes us," I said, trying the best I could to translate the active brain regions into something tangible.

"She just needs practice," Lisa said. "Speaking takes time to learn. Fine muscular control will take a while. Don't worry, Dragon. We're here for you."

Over the next two hours, we kept watch on her as she adjusted to having a body for the first time. I gave her more control of the body bit by bit, allowing her time to feel and get used to each new sensation and sensory information. She started figuring out control of her limbs, but it was a lot like a baby in an adult's body. The movements were broad, imprecise, and uncoordinated. At the end of it, she still couldn't talk, and was barely able to sit up straight without tipping over every few seconds.

At least she was breathing and blinking normally. We'd have to train her not to mouth-breathe; her jaw was hanging slack far too often.

"Maybe we should actually connect her up with the computers," Lisa suggested.

"What? We've barely managed to make sure her body's working alright," Amy said. "We don't want to overstimulate her again, or introduce even more potential problems."

"For a normal person, yeah. But Dragon? Cyberspace IS her normal. The body is weird. It might help speed up her recovery if she had a bit of familiar territory."

Dragon's head jerked a bit.

Everyone looked at her. She looked at Lisa, and her head jerked again.

"Oh. You're trying to nod, aren't you? You want to try that?"

Lisa was already grabbing the cables.

"Okay, we've never tested this on a live brain for now, so prepare for a bit of… I have no idea, actually." She stuck the cable into the port behind Dragon's ear.

"I'm limiting the data flow to under a megabyte per second," Colin said. Dragon's eyes focused on him. "I know it's terribly slow, but we can ramp it up slowly. We don't want anything to break at this phase."

If Dragon had the coordination to cross her arms and glare, I'm sure she would have. But she seemed happy to get any connection at all. I guess I we had pre-loaded as many memories as we could into the brain, but almost all those memories were from a cyberspace perspective. Maybe bringing her straight into a human-only consciousness had been a mistake.

"I'm giving you access to the auxiliary buffer server," Colin said. "Your access level will… wait, Dragon! Dragon, no!" He started typing and clicking furiously at the computer he was using, to no avail.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothing's wrong. She… just hacked through all the privileges and gave herself full administrative control of the entire facility. That's all," Colin sighed.

"Thank you for everything you've done for me," Dragon's voice came over the building's speaker system.

"Welcome back, Dragon," everyone said.

Lisa looked over at Dragon's body, which was now flopped down on the bed again. She pinched her arm.

"Ow! Lisa, what was that for?" Dragon asked.

"Dragon, we worked hard to give you this body, now you better learn to use it properly and take care of it! No cheating!"

"But…"

"No buts! Start figuring out your vocal cords and talk to us normally, or else I'm unplugging you right now, young lady!" Lisa said. Her hand moved dangerously close to the jack.

Dragon's body squirmed and ineffectively tried to bat Lisa's hand away.

"I understand."

Is this what having a child was like? Or maybe an elderly parent? There were so many things I'd taken for granted that I had no idea needed so much work. Like, well, potty training. Walking. How to chew food. And this was Dragon, who managed to re-learn English in twelve hours. I didn't know how long or how much of a struggle it would have been with a normal human child.

I gained an even greater appreciation for Dad. And Mom. Was I this difficult? Of course I was. Worse, probably. Dragon didn't cry or throw tantrums, she was being very mature about it and doing her best to learn how to use her new body. Good thing it didn't take several years.

"At least she learns fast," I said. "The artificial brain is rearranging and reinforcing connections as we speak. I'm just going to stop monitoring her. It looks like it's working as designed."

With Dragon capable of communicating us through electronics, and everything else functional, there was no need for me to maintain any form of control over the brain. Dragon could be her own person entirely, and I would no longer need to hold the brain together with my power. I "finalized" the brain by having the bots merge, fuse, and lock themselves into place. Going from a collection of trillions of individual bots that deliberately fused themselves into one super-complex trillion-part machine, I could feel my control of it naturally slip away.

I still couldn't figure out why my power did that, or had that kind of limit, but there it was. By making her brain a single, large, complex creation, I would no longer have direct control over it even if I tried.

Roughly eight hours later, Dragon spoke her first words from her physical mouth. "Everyone? Hello?"

"Nice to hear your voice, Dragon. You sound a little dry, though," Elena said.

"Dry? Is that what this sensation is?" Dragon's voice was kind of croaking, almost like it was sore.

Amy touched her skin and instantly had a diagnosis. "Dragon, you're dehydrated. And hungry."

"I see. Is that what the odd rumbling and pain down here is?" She moved her hand down and rubbed her pelvis.

"No, your stomach is up…" Amy's eyes widened and she blushed a little.

Amy bolted up to a sitting position and touched Dragon's hand. "Uh, girls? Can we help Dragon get up? I don't think she can walk yet, and, uh, we have to potty train her. Quickly."

We realized there was a whole lot more to this, and we'd essentially be taking care of the world's smartest toddler for a while. Elena had gone out to buy some baby food, because we weren't sure Dragon was getting the hang of chewing yet. We also needed a sippy cup and bib, and adult diapers.

Apparently none of us had thought ahead enough for this. We had been too worried about just making sure Dragon would live.

It took us a while but we did manage to get the basics down. Once Dragon was fed, and ready to talk again, she had to ask the most pressing question. "What happened to me?"

"Do you remember the Dragonslayers?"

"I don't remember anything about them. Are they new?" she asked. "My databases are patchy and need restoration. The latest memory, I think, involved attempting to investigate the PRT ENE director, but I had to stop."

"Interesting," Colin said, rubbing his beard. "I think, when they gained access to your servers, they deliberately deleted all mention of themselves first. You've been fighting against them for years. They stole some of your creations and often sabotage or attack your facilities."

"The good thing is their method of attack is no longer going to be effective," Lisa said. "You won't have to worry about that any more."

"Perhaps some further Tinkering would bring back some familiarity. Go over your old designs and current projects," Colin suggested. "Help you remember where you were and your plans."

Typical Colin… but I didn't disagree. There was only so much we could teach Dragon, the rest would be up to her to practice. She would get some practice simply talking and looking around using her hands alongside Colin.

I didn't mention it to anyone else, but I hoped Dragon wasn't… crippled, power-wise. Although I had built Dragon's brain with a Corona Pollentia and Gemma, how much of Dragon's performance came from being an AI, versus coming from a parahuman power. Of course, people had just assumed that she was a person with powers, but now that we knew she was an AI, we couldn't be sure. After all, even as Colin fixed Dragon's systems, he never came across something that looked like a Corona Pollentia or Gemma. Could those even exist in computer hardware? Or software?

Those structures not being in the brain, or not looking normal, was not unprecedented. After all, there were some parahumans out there, especially Case 53's and many Breakers, whose powers left them without a physical or biological brain at all. Still, this was something we would have to keep track of.

Lisa figured that, even if she didn't regain powers per se, simply removing the limiters that her creator had put on her could make up for it. While it wouldn't be as amazing as the collaboration and creation she known for with many other Tinkers, if we could at least get her holding steady with her current technology was already a huge boon. Mass-production of containment foam, deploying rescue drones, maintaining the Birdcage, coordinating Endbringer fights – simply having Dragon at all was already a huge boon to the world.

The next morning, Dragon said, "I think I had a rather vivid hallucination last night. Is that what dreaming is like?"

All of us nodded.

"I finally understand why it is often referred to in literature as prophetic or revealing," Dragon said. "It was… a strange experience."

"Don't take too much stock into it," Elena said. "It's usually nonsensical."

"It made me question who I was," Dragon said.

"Personally, I find people tend to be too hung up about the past. What really matters is how you move forward. Like, are you still going to keep trying to save the world?" Lisa asked.

"Well, I do think I prefer existence. I'd rather not undergo the alternative again. Saving the world simply helps me continue existing. What I don't understand is why villains do what they do."

"Most of villainy comes from either lack of resources, lack of responsibility, or lack of effort," Colin answered. "The first is easiest to understand. Those who lack the capability of getting what they need or want legally, may resort to doing it illegally. Victims of circumstance, if you will. Then there is simply greed, or short-sightedness. Those who are unable to see the long-term consequences of their actions and merely want short-term satisfaction. That's what I used to think, at least."

"What made you change your mind?" I asked.

"Calvert was the obvious turning point. But… knowing what I do now, I have to revisit some past decisions," Colin said with a heavy sigh. "I thought I had all the answers. What do you know about Paige McAbee?"

"Who's that?" Amy asked.

Colin brought up a news article for us on his computer to show us. "Singer. With a Master power. She mainly used it to enhance the enjoyment of her concerts. No history of violence. She accidentally set it off when her stalker ex-boyfriend confronted her, and ended up forcing him to kill himself in a gruesome manner. In the past, I remembered Dragon mentioning the case. I didn't think much of it. The judge sentenced her to the Birdcage. I just assumed the judgment was the end of it."

"I remember you mentioning that one to me, as well," Elena said. "You were very much against it."

"I found the memory," Dragon said. "I brought her into the Birdcage myself. But the judge clearly violated the parahuman sentencing act. Other parahumans have accidentally killed on their first offense before."

"When you brought her to the Birdcage anyway, despite your protests, I originally considered it as a virtue. Being able to set aside your own opinion and performing your duty regardless," Colin said. "Now… I'm not so sure."

"Dragon, if the same thing happened again, would you still do the same? Or would you refuse the order?" Elena asked. "Not that I think there's a right answer, mind you. No matter what, you're still my friend."

"As am I," Colin added. "I didn't pick the name 'Errant' for nothing. I am no longer beholden to the whims of authorities. I'll stand by you, especially against those who seek to exploit you.."

"I would not," Dragon said firmly. "I believe that, in the past, I couldn't even act as myself. Which is also why I question who I am now. Perhaps I had been coerced into being a hero. Or any of my other actions. It's difficult to tell, because some of my own memories have been scrubbed. I clearly had opinions that were the opposite of the actions I outwardly performed."

"Like I said before. Don't get too hung up on what you were. Life goes on, do what you believe is right, and that defines who you are now. You're not a slave to the past," Lisa said.

"I see. Thank you, Lisa."

A loud growl came from Dragon's stomach.

Lisa sighed. "But you are a slave to biology now," she said. "Amy, would you mind helping Dragon while we try chewing today?" Lisa asked. I knew that Amy would still be needed for a while longer while Dragon learned not to bite her own tongue. And we also expected some more scrapes while she learned to walk, or bathe.

Since the others had each had chances to go into the city, they insisted that Colin and I take some time off. The two of us had been working almost non-stop. Even though I didn't feel overworked because of my extra brains, and Colin insisted he wasn't thanks to his caffeine, the others weren't taking no for an answer.

Even Dragon brought archived memories where she had to tell him to take a break. She had a list. It was long.

Colin wasn't exactly what I would consider ideal company for strolling through town, but at least he seemed to be putting in some effort. We went without costumes, as anonymously as we could.

We walked along the shore of Vancouver for a while. It was kind of like Brockton Bay's Boardwalk, except longer. Much longer. The "nice" area of town in Brockton Bay was only about half a mile long before it got sketchy again, the "nice" area of their waterfront stretched for miles. We saw plenty of people simply jogging and biking along. No pepper spray on their belts or anything.

We went off the path when we got to the big park, it was basically a forest attached to downtown. With slightly more privacy, Colin spoke up. "I have to apologize to you," he said.

"Is this about Sophia? I thought we were over that." I asked.

"Partly," he said. "I overestimated my own abilities. I thought I could optimize everything, including management of the Wards. I just never considered the possibility that there was a problem I was unable to solve. That arrogance... it allowed too much to slip by. Including Sophia. So, I apologize for that."

"Um. Apology accepted," I said. I didn't really know what to do in this situation. "So... what changed?"

The answer came quickly. "Calvert. Dragon. I realized that... well, my priorities were incorrect. There were things more important for me than simply capturing villains. That the PRT was not the sole bastion of heroes in America. I was facing multiple problems, and I had to admit that those were problems I couldn't fix." He sighed heavily. "What I'm trying to say is... well, Dragon... I've... thank you for saving her."

"Well, it was the right thing to do anyway," I said.

"Even so, it was the first time I truly needed to trust someone," Colin said. "Not just you, but Lisa as well. Especially because she was a former villain. You see, for me, trust used to be a matter of simply searching PRT or internet records for the history of who I was dealing with. Records. Deciphering intent. Game theory. Probabilities. But that's not really trust, is it?"

"It's a kind of trust, I guess." Did everything have to get philosophical around here? I just wanted to enjoy a nice walk in a nice city.

"Perhaps that's not the word I was looking for. I had to put faith in you. And Lisa. Panacea has certainly earned her reputation, and that decision was simple. But you're still relatively new, and Lisa had a reputation as a minor villain. You were going to use a power far beyond anything you had displayed previously. Panacea as well. Tattletale said she had a solution, but her power didn't let her explain the leaps in logic. But Dragon had faith in you... and, well, I needed to put my faith in you to save Dragon. I never realized I even had such a thing."

"I suppose there have been times where my own faith in humanity seems to have dropped," I said. Then I got out of Winslow.

"Hm. Well, I had to put my faith in you, and you have earned my trust. Thank you, Taylor."

"Uh, you're welcome. So, um, which of Lisa's recommendations is closest?"

"Yeah, dad. Dragon's been great. See you in a bit." As the days passed, and Dragon was learning more and more about keeping herself alive, we were making preparations to head back home.

"Have fun, Taylor. I love you."

"Love you too, Dad." I hung up the phone and wandered over to the remodelled kitchen. Now that Dragon needed to eat, she also needed the other standard human comforts. Colin had been hard at work, using the tools we had at hand to remodel parts of her workshop.

Lisa and Amy had wanted to smack Colin when he offered to make Dragon some kind of nutrient-paste machine. They absolutely refused to allow Dragon anything less than a broad palate of actual food. Vancouver happened to be a good place for it too - having Canada's westernmost international airport nearby made for a whole lot of immigrants from the Pacific countries. It had an even bigger population of Asians than Brockton Bay, though no ridiculously overpowered cape like Lung to unite them into a gang. Mostly, it just meant a whole lot of Chinese, Japanese, Thai, Indian, Vietnamese, and other restaurants in addition to the usual Western fare.

Lisa was determined to feed Dragon samples from every one of them. At least, everything that could be obtained via takeout.

"So what's on the menu today?" I asked.

"I found a place that has butter chicken pizza! I should have left Brockton Bay sooner," Lisa gushed.

"It's common in Toronto. New York, too. You seriously don't have this in Brockton Bay?" Elena asked.

"Let's just say that cultural fusion doesn't do well in a city ruled by two racist gangs," I pointed out.

Dragon was eating slowly, having only mastered chewing a few days ago. "I have to admit that I never expected taste to be so varied. The text and video descriptions don't do it justice."

"Lemme try some of this," I said, grabbing a slice. Honestly, it was really good. The spices weren't something I was used to but definitely something I enjoyed. "Forget Dragon, I need to try all these foods."

"Hey, Dragon, can your powers reverse-engineer the recipe for this?" Elena asked.

"I'm still not sure if I even have powers. However, I can analyze a slice in my mass spectrometer to determine its components," Dragon said with a smile. "With enough processing power I could just about brute-force through any problem."

"I'm sure it won't take too many teraflops to decipher a cookbook. The important thing is that you know there's more to life than living off a diet of coffee and nutrient paste," Lisa said.

Colin just grunted at the jab.

"What are you, my mother?" Dragon joked.

"No, that would be Amy," Lisa said with a smirk, while everyone stared at her. "What? She grew your body from scratch. She's your mommy now."

Dragon looked thoughtful for a second. "So my father would be..."

"Taylor," Lisa said quickly.

"What?" I was taken by surprise.

"She made a large number of small contributions to your body, if you know what I mean," Lisa said with a massive grin.

I nearly spat the pizza out of my mouth. This closer to actually making sense than it should have. "Uh-huh," I said. "So we're one big happy family now?"

"Yeah. And Taylor, you'd better get your shotgun ready. I think I saw Colin giving funny looks to your newborn daughter."

I shook my head. "You guys are horrible!" I laughed. Although, for the life of me, I never would have thought I would see Colin blushing.

Dragon laughed along with us. "So does that mean the two of you are going to give me 'The Talk?' Because I'm getting some funny feelings..."

"That's called cramping. You've been laughing too much," Amy said in a level tone, but very poorly trying to hide a smile.

"Which also means that Dragon officially has more of a sense of humour than Colin does," Lisa pointed out.

"Hey, I'm right here," Colin said. "...but you're not wrong."

Author's Notes:

- There's your icky biology scene for you. I still don't like watching surgery videos.