chapter 6

1 year later

another year has gone by it was a nice year only two times the world nearly ended yup you heard me the world nearly ended two-time once was on a Monday morning.

I had just woken up and noticed straight away something was wrong you can normally tell these things when your house roof is flying into a giant mouth-like blackhole with weird cracks in the sky.

I slowly make my way to the kitchen and see my family sitting at the table Luna somehow glued the chairs down.

mum looked like she had bungy straps to hold them down as I walk in and look at them while holding onto the door with dear life I see mum pulls out a strap for me to join the table with slowly making my way there she helps secure me in hands me a coffee.

looks at the sky and says Mondays am I right they always get pissy on Mondays 'so what's with the creature in the sky' oh that's just Philip he's having a fit because he has to work overtime but I have told him again and again the sooner he gets the job done the faster I send him back to his home to suck on a sun you just can't get good employees nowadays always so dramatic.

apparently mum had summoned this creature named Phillip he apparently was here because they needed him for some cult ritual today as there is an eclipse today so he has to work overtime I just was like ok done with this.

so yeah eventually mum promised him something I'm pretty she said something about making me work harder to grow sun seeds or something.

I'm not sure but I honestly was past caring and then had an idea shouting to mum don't forget to charge him for the roof as.

I shout that both mum and Phillip look at me then mum gets a scary face and starts speaking in eldritch which sounds like screaming in your head then empathize the words witch is actually very hard because they come out like this Ḑ̴̤̳̯͉͕̭͌̓E̶͉̥̭̪̱̰͖̬̥͓̖̬̐̂̔̔́̅̆̎̈́͜͜͝͝͠Ą̶̡̨̟̪̜̞̜̖̠̼̯̥̋̀͋̂͒̄̆̽͛̕͠ͅT̵͔̺̗͖̼͔͇͕̔͝͝ͅH̶͔̞͇̟̦͕̬͑͐̌͂̑͗̈͆ and that can mess with your head.

she then looks at me and gives me a thumbs-up before going back to the conversation with Phillip I looked at Luna and ask her to pass me the toast butter and lemon curd.

because I now had lemons stuck in my head thinking things like when life gives you lemons you make lemonade that's highly flammable to use against eldritch beings because there all a bunch of drama queens.

while I'm contemplating if it is actually possible dad suddenly puts down his paper and says 'Cornelius Fudge just got sworn in as the head of the Wizengamot I have also heard about him apparently raising a secret army of griffon hawks.

I look at dad and start to wonder if he was onto something there then thought how would they train them in secret everyone knows griffon hawks don't like doing as there told maybe reverse phycology works on them then he might destroy the world I then realized how Lovegood I just sounded my next thought was I have become one of them.

so yeah the first-world ending thing was Cornelius Fudge because apparently, Phillip is a pushover the second time the world nearly ended was when Luna yet again tried stealing one of mums potions and spilled a bottle on a tiny spider.

we all kind of just froze, and slowly looked at the spider no bigger than my pinky suddenly it split into two perfectly the same spiders then four then six then 12 before we could even think about what to do mum started screaming about killing it with fire then mentioned how we have to kill the main body to stop them multiplying yeah we stopped the main body but only after it had made thousands of clones.

I then realized something all the spiders in harry potter the chamber of secrets all the little ones that Hagrid told them to follow weren't Aragog's children.

they were because of the Lovegood's and mum said she got rid of them yeah by chucking them in the forbidden forest is that like a trash yard for pandora other than that I have just been keeping up with my training I'm so close to almost being novice high level I think by next year I should reach the intermediate low level.