Chapter 14: Her Voice

Anger.

Rage towards something that gives you the feeling of wanting to rip to it to shreds. The desire to destroy the thing that makes you feel this type of way. Pure, unaltered rage to something or someone because they have done something wrong to you. They have done some unforgivable to you.

That is just taking it to the extreme. People do feel anger about things for some reason yet a majority of the time it does not need to go that far. Some feel anger for the slightest things in life and yet they lash out in the most extreme and unnecessary ways. The sort of action like that is like a piece in a much bigger puzzle called the human mind.

People lash out for various reasons but we can all agree on is that at times, the thing they are lashing out is not because of it and the reason goes way deeper than it is. The thing in front of people just seems convenient to vent out their frustrations.

But just like hate, there are only a few things that i was angered about in life. The cancellation of my favorite tv shows, the delayed production of some anime i watched or the death of a character in a novel i read. So it's evident that the things i felt anger about were minor.

Yet i am by no means a fully calm person. I have a shit temper and so it forces me to control it a lot of the time, since i admit i do have some anger issues. Until recently i did a pretty bang-up job in handling it. Well… That was until now.

"What do you mean you don't know who the property was, perpetrator?"

"It means what it means, son, after further investigation these past few weeks. The people we have arrested has not given any names to who led them to attack you. We have already been ordered to cancel the investigation, as there were no more leads in this case. That is all. Have a good day."

Before i could ask more questions about my case, the police officer left the way he came in. My mother was about to force the officer to stay but i held her back as i didn't want me and my mother to be charged for a felony.

Calming down the simmering rage that was building up inside mom, i also tried to calm myself down as i never felt a situation this illogical and bullshit in my life. Reason being that i already told them who was behind the assault.

They did indeed investigate Bradley, but the conclusion was that he was clean. He was accounted for when the attack happen, there were various testimonies to even prove it so the police can't do anything about it. It was said that he was with the principal at that time.

The police may be fooled but not me. I know clear as day to know who was the one to attack me and i can't be possibly mistaken. His body language, his manner of speaking, and how he acted in general were the dead giveaway as he tortured me. And that deal he gave me. It was clear to wedge a gap between us and Lorelai. So there was only one person to benefit from that damned 'deal'. It of course, Bradley.

That little shit, what the hell did he do? Even the police can't do anything about it, yet the most suspicious point was that who ordered them to stop investigating. This situation becomes stranger by the minute. If they won't do anything, then there's only 1 option left.

"Mom, i need to go somewhere, ill be back."

"Malik, You and I both know how this situation is bullshit. Yet why does it seem you don't even care for it one bit?"

My mom said with rage in her tone. I sigh at her statement as what i am feeling was the complete opposite. I understand why she feels this way as i admit, i have been pretty passive in this whole case, opening my time with Lorelai to calm her down and instead of helping the police with my case.

There is a good reason for it, but not now. I don't want to spoil the sunrise. That would ruin the fun.

"Mom, don't be like that, i do not care, you know? I was the one who got tortured."

My mom looked at me for a few seconds with her piercing glare, but i stood my ground as i smiled back at her apparent anger. Despite mom acting like this, i knew she was not feeling anger at me. She was angry at the police for not doing everything they can to solve my case. See, people sometimes Ironside angry at the thing they are lashing out.

"Hmph fine honey, if they won't do anything, Ill do it myself."

She left in a huff in a short while as i could only sigh at her reaction. I will answer all questions in due time, but for now i can only hide it from her. I will exact revenge no matter how cringe it sounds, but i will payback this debt soon enough. But there are more pressing matters i have to attend to.

I have a date with Lorelai today.

…

I waited at the bus stop as usual, travelling to where me and Lorelai were meeting up for our date. Due to my case being ongoing for the past few weeks since the event, and my hospitalization in that time, i wasn't able to spend quality time with Lorelai in a place that was not the Hospital. So there was a lot of making up that i have to do.

The school canceled the event by the way since it wasn't exactly a good look for the school when a student was tortured in their school rooftop. After i was escorted out of that place and placed in an ambulance, the school quickly shut the party down before things got out hand even more.

In the subsequent events, the school had to release a formal apology to my family in negligence for their part in letting that happen to me. But the media coverage regarding our school, was in no way negative, and i wasn't surprised to be honest.

The media did mention my situation, but it was quickly glossed over by the fact that the school made reparations towards me along with a formal apology, as the apology was complete bullshit in my eyes. The news spun it as if the school was the savior in the situation when Neil and the acre were the one who saved me.

This whole fucking situation was complete bullshit from the start.

The bus drew near as i could see it in the distance. I erased the chaotic thoughts in my mind as i grounded myself in place. The weather was perfect for my date with Lorelai today as it was pretty mild and a bit cloudy. Not enough to spell rain later on, i believe.

I felt the clothes i was wearing today as i once again asked mom for help to regard it. This was officially the first date me and Lorelai will be having. Though it took a while, my mom managed to pick something i could wear. And we settled on a purple tight fitting shirt accentuating my upper body as well as dark jeans and white shoes to complete the fit.

There was also a dark ring on my right hand thumb since i have a certain liking towards rings. It wasn't perfect, but it was enough to suit me. There did come a certain point when we picked it that mom almost had forced me to redo everything but i suggested otherwise as i don't wanna go through that hell again. Please no.

The doors of the bus opened, letting me in. I looked around for available seats and noticed that at the back there was a vacant spot besides someone. I couldn't look at the person clearly since the bus was pretty packed. Some people were on their phones, some were sleeping while some were reading a book.

Nevertheless, i made my way there. I didn't bother to look at my seatmate as i was pretty tired from all the stress piling up in recent weeks. A date with Lorelai was what i need to recover from the shit i went through.

I closed my eyes, wanting to rest and recover for a few minutes before my date starts. I wanted to wear earphones along the bus ride to the meetup but only now do i remember that i forgot to bring it. Whatever then. The humming engine of the bus it is.

Just as i closed my eyes, an earphone piece entered my right ear. Confused, i was about to open my eyes when i heard what song was playing. 'Line without a hook' by Rick Montgomery. The moment i heard the song, i didn't bother to open it as i already knew who was beside me.

I reached out my right hand to clasp the hand of the one seated beside me, and with no surprise in my part someone reciprocated and held my hand. This familiar soft touch i felt throughout my time being rooted to a hospital bed. The hand that held my own as i suffered grievous injuries enough to hospitalize me. The fingers that intertwined with mine as she supported me throughout my whole ordeal.

"Lorelai." as i gently called out her name.

"Yes?" she replied with a hint of softness to it. A voice i heard that echoed throughout my very being. A voice i can never tire of no matter how much time i spend with her.

A voice which every time i hear, a subtle calmness washes over me, yet at the same time, her voice jolts my mind as i become excited to just even speak with her. A voice that i hope i will hear for the last time as i laying dying in a hospital bed beside her.

"I really like your voice."

"I like yours too."

There were no words exchanged after that. We held each other's hands throughout the entire bus ride. And instead of Lorelai leaning against my shoulder, i leaned against hers instead as i caught a subtle scent of her perfume. She smelled wonderful, as always.

As my head was laid against her shoulder, i felt the warmness coursing through her body on her shoulder. I felt the gentle touch of her hand as she caressed my face, sometimes playing with it for some reason. This is what i live for.

It was only Lorelai and me in our little universe again. What more could i ask for?

But all good things must come to an end as the bus finally stopped on our destination. That short amount of rest on her shoulder was enough to give me peace of mind, giving me the proper energy to make her happy.

We stood up with our hands held and made our way out of the crowded bus. We stepped off the steps as i held her hand so that she may not fall. I didn't open my eyes throughout the entire bus ride but now i was regretting it as i could now see what she looked like.

She had a yellow floral dress and was wearing sandals. She brought a yellow purse to match her outfit.

"You look beautiful, as always, Lorelai."

I said with clear admiration at my tone. Lorelai blushed a little at my comment but recovered as she held my hand, leading the way towards wherever we were going. To be honest, I still have no idea where we were going.

I just asked her if she wanted to go on a date and before i could even finish what I was saying she said yes. Sometimes i talked to Neil regarding romance which led me to asking him how to ask someone out on a date. This is what he said.

"Just ask her out. It's that simple. But whether the girl will agree or not is another matter in and of itself. Because you see, there is a good chance the girl will flat out reject you because for reasons unknown to us guys. But usually it's because they don't like you, that all."

After i heard it from Neil, a time where i haven't even met Lorelai, i thought that asking a girl out on a date was one of the hardest things a man can do. Neil painted the hardships as if you are about to slay an evil dragon. Yet i asked Lorelai once and she already agreed before i finished my sentence.

Neil sometimes exaggerates something i concluded.

I wipe it off my mind so i can focus on the now. Particularly, walking with Lorelai in the bustling streets of the city. Looking around, i notice that we were dead center in the middle of the city. Shouts rang about in the streets, street performers showing off their skills in some parts while people watched and became entertained. Sometimes they gave money to them too,, so that was cool.

"Hey Malik, let's go to the mall."

Before i could respond, she skipped about and dragged me along in her hand. But i held her hand pretty tight since i didn't want to lose her in this big crowd. Holding her soft hands tight, i made sure that she won't accidentally bump into someone.

Going along the motion, we passed by various people drinking coffee in some café, musicians playing in some corners of the street, and even patrolling cops which Lorelai greeted hello with a kind smile. The officers greeted back with a smile of their own and nodded. Lorelai is indeed the brightest sunshine in my view.

I could see her yellow floral dress as it fluttered in the wind, with her dark hair bobbing up and down as she skipped in the streets. Though i thought of just walking with her but i let her be as i didn't want to spoil her mood. I just enjoyed the moment as it is and that was enough for me.

In a short while, we arrived at the movie theater and were a bit confused, i thought we were going some place else?

"Lorelai, correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure that this wasn't the place you told me about."

"Oh yeah, about that. I kinda changed my mind at the last minute, i hope you don't mind."

She said as she blushed a little, presuming to be a little embarrassed at her sudden change of mind. But I don't really care at all as the place doesn't matter as long as I'm with her.

"Its fine Lorelai, i actually wanted to watch a movie with you for quite some time, just didn't have the time you know?"

"Really! Great! and i also wanted to go to the movies with you."

"That's settled then." i said as i smiled at her beaming face.

But my smile was quickly wiped off the moment she told me what we were gonna watch.

"So what are we gonna watch, anyway?"

"Its nothing much really, the movie is called 'Smile' if i recall."

Shit. This wasn't going as i hoped it would be. Okay, maybe my previous statement of being anywhere with her as long as I'm with Lorelai was a bit too much. Maybe anywhere but watching horror movies.

"Um, can we not?"

The moment i said it i quickly regretted it. Lorelai almost broke into tears as she heard that i didn't want to watch the movie with her. She looked down as if she didn't want me looking at her face, but i already saw tears forming in her eyes.

"On second thought i would love to watch it with you Lorelai."

Her pouty, almost full of tears, expression reverted back to a smile full of sunshine in half a second. It's as if nothing ever happened. I have a subtle feeling that something was wrong with this situation.

"Great! let me bo guy the tickets, be right back." she said as she ran off to the ticket booth.

I gave a sigh as i realize that I'm really helpless in front of Lorelai. With any other person i wouldn be acting like this, not even when confronting Bradley as i was being tortured but somehow, I'm tame when Lorelai was involved. Whatever.

Thinking of possible solutions to get out of this situation, i concluded that there was none as every possible solution I could think of will end up with Lorelai crying. So this was my inevitable fate then.

Erasing the thought of escaping, i relinquish to her as i go to the nearby store to buy some food for us. I get to the counter and saw a wide array of food choices. Hotdogs, popcorn, chips and drinks. There was other stuff but i was too lazy to go check.

I buy a popcorn bucket for us and some chips and drinks. After that i went back and saw that Lorelai was standing there holding 2 tickets for both of us. She had a beaming expression on her face, humming a tune under her breath as her body swayed, indicating joy. As long as she's happy, till even go through a horror movie, a bit reluctantly though.

"Alright, let's go Malik. We're just in luck. The move was just starting."

"Yup, luck us…"

I said with a hint of sadness in my tone, but it seems that Lorelai didn't notice it as she took my hand and dragged me off to the slaughterhouse. Ehem i mean the movie showing.

As we got closer to the entrance, i contemplate my fate up until now.

Maybe i should've tried harder getting out of this.