Chapter 1032: Astonish the Common People (Nine)_1

"We need to analyze this issue in two parts..." Shiller set two beer cans, placed on opposite sides of the table.

"The previous era and the current one, your personality and your mission." Shiller decided to finish his beer first, so he put the liquor aside, organized his thoughts, and then spoke:

"You're a man of the previous era, right?"

Steve, with his head hung low, nodded once and then took another big gulp of his drink. Shiller, spreading out the spilled beer with his fingertip, drew a pattern on the table and then said: "So now, we need to determine, are you more apt to follow your personality or your mission?"

Shiller's body language became more pronounced, waving his hand in the air as he articulated the two parts, but this actually made it easier for Steve to understand. He asked,: "Are you asking whether I see myself as Steve or as Captain America?"

Shiller nodded, Steve looked blankly ahead, as if the alcohol was clouding his thoughts. After a while, he opened his mouth to speak: "For a long time, people called me Captain America, and I felt I was Captain America. So, at that time, I was Captain America."

"But when I woke up, I felt I was Steve. I don't know what's happening to me, maybe... maybe I have a split personality."

"No, you don't, you should listen to a professional psychologist..." Shiller repeated, "You don't have dissociative identity disorder, this is very normal..."

"A part of human self-realization comes from society's need for them." Shiller put forth a theory first, worried that Steve might not understand, he added:

"If society needs Captain America more, and being Captain America makes you feel needed and helps you prove your worth, then you would feel like you are Captain America."

"At that time, America needed recruits. Recruitment needed propaganda figures. You appreciated that this was your contribution to the country, so you willingly became Captain America."

"But when you woke up, Captain America was already a dead man, no one had any expectations for him, no one needed you anymore. You couldn't be Captain America, naturally, all you had left was to be Steve."

Shiller gulped his beer and tossed the empty can aside, grabbed the bottle of liquor that Steve had opened earlier, and said, lowering his head: "It seems like you lean more towards being Captain America, but this could also be the product of societal and environmental conditioning."

"We don't need to talk about the causes, just the results. You became Steve because you couldn't be Captain America. Deep down, you still want to be Captain America."

"But now, in times of peace, there are only a few villains that crop up infrequently. Their abilities don't measure up to yours, so they are easy to take care of. There was Hydra to fight, but they have been quiet recently, so you don't feel needed anymore."

"Without a sense of urgent mission, you start to ruminate, to grapple with philosophy and the meaning of life. This is the root of your anxiety—you want to feel needed."

Steve fell silent for a moment, but still nodded and said: "Do I sound like some war merchant? Some fanatic perpetually hoping for a fight..."

Shiller shook his head vigorously and said: "I've told you, don't so easily define yourself... You should listen to a professional psychologist..."

"Humans have an ultimate need—to realize their self-worth. This is a normal emotion everyone has. Look at Spider Man, why did he go from being a street hero to a researcher? It's because, in the lab, he feels more needed."

"Although the lab work is more tedious and miscellaneous, and research is very dry and devoid of any fun—nothing like swinging in the New York sky—it's rewarding because he feels needed."

"Many times, this desire to be needed, to fulfil one's self-worth, can overwhelm logic. For example, you may know that a job is hard and doesn't pay well, but sometimes, you might continue doing it because without you, the project can't move forward."

"If you regard being Captain America as a project, you are indeed the core of this project. Without Captain America, all those propaganda plans would dissipate."

Shiller had another gulp of his drink, his speech was getting more slurred, yet his train of thought was still incredibly clear. Or perhaps, a psychologist's analysis had become his instinct, so even when his mind is numb from alcohol, his insights remain piercingly incisive.

"Your issue lies in transitioning from a highly-needed environment to a completely unneeded one. The large gap in the fulfilment of your self-worth has left you deeply distressed."

Taking a deep breath, Shiller struggled to open his eyes and then said, "Let's return to what we were saying earlier... the issue of the two parts..."

"You were Captain America of the previous era and Steve of this era. From your prior attitude, it's evident that you still prefer the identity of being Captain America of the old era. As for the identity of being Steve in this era, you're feeling lost."