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Creepy Pharmacist: All My Patients Are Horrific

[This world is steeped in mystique.] [Vampires, werewolves, technology, magical potions, ghosts, bioengineered beings, divination, and puppets; every terrifying element you could conceive of, exists in this world.] [One must carry a lantern when stepping outside.] [One must never wander far.] [Ten meters beyond the gates, darkness will consume you.] [Whether attending to humans, ghosts, or stitched monsters, one must maintain composure at all times.] [Should you ever lose your composure, it will give rise to malicious intent.] This is the translation of the Chinese novel "Creepy Pharmacist: All My Patients Are Horrific". It's a horror comedy with more comedy than horror. I hope you enjoy it.

Fish9527 · หนังสือและวรรณกรรม
เรตติ้งไม่พอ
94 Chs

Deal?

Lynne tried to redirect his gaze away from the three severed heads she was holding, his expression becoming grave. Taking a deep breath, he said: "I truly have run into some trouble, quite significant trouble in fact. I tried handling it on my own, but as you can see..." He gestured to his injured state, his face feigning innocence. "I must have lost at least a ton of blood."

The Blood Clad Evil Spirit chuckled, "So, our notorious potion shopkeeper does have issues he can't handle?"

Lynne cautiously adjusted the snake in his eye socket, replying earnestly, "Indeed. So, let's make a deal. I know you're incredibly powerful. If you help me eliminate the creature chasing me, I'll waive your bill for five months. How does that sound? A great deal, one-time offer. Don't miss out."

The Blood Clad Evil Spirit continued to smile, unmoved by his proposition.

"Considering you've said you're being chased, you're rather calm, standing here and chatting with me. Aren't you in the least bit anxious?"

Lynne rubbed his temples, responding sincerely, "Will panicking solve the problem?"

Her smile grew even brighter.

From behind, a rolling blood-red mist rapidly approached.

Thud—

Thud—

Loud, earthquake-like tremors resonated.

[Warning! Warning! Danger is rapidly approaching!]

[Warning! Warning! Danger is rapidly approaching!]

Yet Lynne remained still, gazing into her twinkling eyes. Taking another deep breath, he said: "Name your price, then. Whatever you want, just tell me. Surely, you wouldn't really want to see me die, would you?"

The Blood Clad Evil Spirit, still smiling,"It seems the little trickster has figured me out. But since you've allowed me to decide, I won't hold back."

Her tongue delicately grazed her lips, and leaning slightly forward, her luscious red lips brushed against his cheek. A heady scent of blood emanated from her, filling Lynne's nostrils to the brim.

"You... Have you ever submitted to me before?" Her voice, like a devil's whisper, murmured into his ear. "Come, beg me. Kneel before me, kiss my toes, tell me you wish to submit to me, and I'll surely assist you."

The corner of her mouth, close to Lynne's face, curled up in playful mockery.

A brief silence. It was as if the very air had solidified.

"Is this your idea of flirting?" Lynne tilted his head, looking at her with a playful smile.

"No," the Blood Clad Evil Spirit responded, her face still adorned with that teasing smile. "I don't care for flirting at times like this."

Silence. It rumbled, echoing all around.

In the next moment, Lynne smirked.

"Off I go."

He patted her shoulder and deftly sidestepped her. Donning the hood of his blood cloak, he resembled a shadowy figure from the night, swiftly making his way into the inky mists of the alley ahead.

"If business is as usual tomorrow morning, I'll help you dispel the curse. Of course, at a friendly discount. Until next time!"

With a jaunty tilt of his chin, Lynne gave a thumbs up to the curious little creature in her arms, his lips curving into a bright, radiant smile. In a blink, he vanished into the distant darkness.

No explanations. No responses. Seemingly, no answers were required.

Standing there, the Blood Clad Evil Spirit gazed off in the direction Lynne had disappeared to, her expression a mix of surprise, amusement, and perhaps... A newfound respect.

"This guy..." She caressed her forehead, a slight look of exasperation showing on her face. "That really was..."

Thwack—

A tentacle shot out from the mist, yanking Lynne back in an instant. Before Lynne could react, the Blood Clad Evil Spirit gleefully o(*≧▽≦)ツ cradled him in her arms, smothering him against her ample bosom.

"Absolutely adorable!!"

[Ding! Blood Clad Evil Spirit's Favorability towards you +10]

[Ding! Blood Clad Evil Spirit's Favorability towards you +10]

"Just kidding! Just kidding! Truly, you're the boy who can lift my curse. Even in dire moments, when you stand firm, you're utterly irresistible~"

"And that smile earlier, so dashing. I have a soft spot for boys who remain steadfast under pressure. It unleashes such a wave of maternal love in me! ☆(≧∀≦*)ノ" Love it! Absolutely love it!"

"Oolaa!" The little creature (๑>︶<)و playfully waved its straw.

The Blood Clad Evil Spirit, a look of sheer bliss on her face, cuddled Lynne's head as if he were a doll, swaying side to side.

Lynne felt like he was adrift in a stormy sea, struggling against her overwhelming advances. Her bosom was like tumultuous waves, tossing him about.

When he finally managed to catch a breath, he exclaimed, "What's the meaning of this?!"

"The meaning is..."

[Crisis level 90%]

[Crisis level 100%]

Lynne's head finally emerged from her overbearing embrace, and in that moment, he was met with a face that had split open, revealing sharp barbs and wriggling tentacles. A smile, split in two, dangled from either side of her face.

"I'll help."

Swish swish—

In an instant, countless dark, grotesque tentacles erupted from her body. Like vines, they pierced the ground, causing massive rocks to break through. The tentacles easily entangled these rocks, turning the entire street into a web of writhing tendrils.

Boom—

A deafening noise of tearing air. Dozens of loud impacts. The flying boulders momentarily halted the approach of the creature in the mist. As the crimson fog dissipated, the twisted monstrosity slowly came into view. Its enormous vertical pupil fixed on Lynne and the Blood Clad Evil Spirit.

"Target identified... Initiating hunt... High-intensity secondary target interference detected... Analyzing information... Species... Spirit Aggregate... Consumption priority... High... Intensity analysis... High..."

Lynne stared in shock at the unfolding scene.

The Blood Clad Evil Spirit, with a smile, gently handed the curious baby in her arms to Lynne and began to stride gracefully toward the fleshy monstrosity confronting them.

Her slender and pale fingers rapidly elongated, producing dripping, black talons nearly half a meter in length. Her wild hair transformed into countless serpents, each with a human face.

Snap—

When she lifted her head again, her eyes danced with frenzied pleasure and madness, the visage of a malevolent spirit.

"Oh Lynne, you've certainly attracted a challenging monster this time," she giggled eerily.

Her mouth stretched grotesquely to the back of her ears, her lengthy talons hanging limply in front of her, and she advanced with an unnatural, distorted laughter emanating from her throat.

"..."

Wide-eyed, Lynne, clutching the little creature, hastily stepped back, warning, "Be careful! This creature isn't easy to deal with; don't underestimate it!"

He swiftly relayed all the information he had about the creature to the Blood Clad Evil Spirit, detailing its characteristics, strengths, and vulnerabilities.

"Challenging to deal with, you say... heeheehee... challenging indeed..."

The smile on the Blood Clad Evil Spirit's face grew even more unsettling. She swayed slowly, her body's palpable curse intensifying, its chaotic energy almost tangible. Even Lynne, standing behind her, could feel the profound cold and madness emanating from her.