CHAPTER 32

Genesis's POV

               It was a different feeling around him. Different. Much more different from what I shared with Keegan. If there was a name for it, I wouldn't know because I couldn't explain it or describe it or try to put it into words but it was there. Different but familiar.

Familiar.

It did feel familiar with him.

It always has.

From that day we met each other - more like crashed into hello, that moment had felt like some kind of déjà vu. Almost to say that I had been there before, dreamt it or experienced it in my mind but somehow must have forgotten it. That particular moment sembled an out of body experience. It always had sat with me, begging me to delve deeper into my memory to find see where it fits.

It wasn't in the way he looked or in the way he spoke nor was it his far from brittle attitude or his cold as ice character. The extraordinary energy about him that always consumes and challenges me all at once at every brush and the way he dismantles my defences. Each exchange of breath between our lips always felt like the energy of a thousand lives, like our souls had known each other all along.

It was crazy.

And stupid.

And wrong.

Wrong in all ramifications, wrong in every way possible, considering my relationship with his best friend and the feelings we share for each other. I was aware of how wrong it was but yet, I couldn't stop it or hide from it, especially at this very moment when my hands fisted into the sheets in sheer nervousness and my heart thumped so hard in my chest as his deep breathing filled the drums of my ears.

The silence stretched so wide between us, punctured by the short breaths we both expelled from our lips.

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply as my mind flashed back to that night in his room. That was the last time we were caught up in a rendezvous and the very first time our encounter hadn't ended so badly. Reminiscing about the way his gentle hands had caressed my skin in the dark like he knew were all my hidden sweet spots were located by heart and the sweet songs his skilled tongue made my body sing in series of bone-crushing orgasms. It felt as though he was sucking nectar from an intricate petal. A swallowed drone broke free from my slightly parted lips.

The pleasures were instantaneous. Fierce, strong, keen as he took me to higher places I never thought I could reach. It was everything I had wanted my first time to be and more. I shook my head in a bid to flee from those unbidden thoughts but no matter how much I tried, they always - always managed to rule out every other thought in my mind and stay dominant.

I was highly attracted to him but he spelled trouble.

He knew it.

I knew it.

We both knew it.

And maybe, just maybe that was the reason why he was keeping away from me.

I bit the insides of my cheek for how whisperous my voice sounded as soon as I cracked the silence.

"Keegan isn't here."

He didn't say anything in response to that. The silence lingered for seconds. I would have thought he hung up if not for his steady breathing telling me he was still near.

His voice was a deep and quiet rumble. It reminded me of the sounds of thunder up in the sky and how scared I was of them as a kid.

"Where is he?"

"He just...he just stepped out. He'll be back very soon. Is there anything you...uh... want me to...to tell him?"

Another stretch of silence before his voice cut through it.

"Not your problem."

The resignation in his voice signalled me of his intent to end the call that second.

"WAIT!"

What was I doing? I should have let him hang up.

God! I'm so stupid

I withdrew the phone from my ears and glanced at the screen. The minutes still rolled by. The call was still on. He had waited.

What do I say?

My mind was totally blank.

I swallowed the huge lump that had formed in my throat and squeezed a large portion of the bed sheet into my sweaty palm.

Why did I have to stop him?

Why didn't I just let him go?

Surely, he was waiting to hear what I wanted to say to him.

But I had nothing.

It was a feeling of dread, anxiety and panic all at once. A tingling sensation started in my fingers as my muscles twitched. Cold spider-like chills raced up and down my spine.

I clenched my eyes and parted my lips, choosing to release the first thing that came to mind.

"I want to see you." I rasped out, unintelligibly.

Due to how disjointed and inarticulate I sounded, I was in doubt he heard me.

I repeated, "I want to....."

Immediately, the door clicked open. I snapped my head to see Keegan stumbling in with Lana high on his shoulder.

I cut the call immediately and rushed to them.

"Is she okay?" I asked, concern dripping from my voice.

He put her down on her bed and made to unbuckle her heels. "Yeah. Drunk. Found her on the floor outside." He gritted out. I noticed the deep lines that had taken court on his forehead and his lips was set into a grim line. His jaw was clenched. He was angry.

I touched his arm. His muscles flexed under my skin. "She's going to be okay."

"I know. She just...she just keeps doing this everytime she visits him and I'm sick of having to clean up her mess every damn time. It's exhausting really."

I frowned and made to ask what he meant but Lana turned. We both averted our attention to her. She stretched and yawned and opened her eyes. Smiling like one who had lost her brains, her eyes zeroed in on us.

"Hi." She cackled. "What's up, you two? "Did you know..." She gulped. "...if we made Mexican food illegal, illegal aliens wouldn't be able to eat in the United States and all illegal border crossings would stop?"

Her brother, angry and worried ran his hands down his face and sighed. "Shut up. You're spitting crap."

"When people see you lying down with your eyes closed, they still ask, 'are you sleeping?" No bitch, I'm training to die." Her laughter rose up high in the air, disrupting the still silence of the night. She guffawed at her own joke, the pitch climping up and tumbling down till it just didn't climb anymore. Her countenance changed and soon, her laughter died down, slowly giving way for the sea of tears to flood through.

Keegan sighed for the umpteenth time and moved to her. Sliding in, he embraced her in his arms, cradling her head into his neck whilst rubbing up and down her spine. She clung to him, squashing the front of his shirt with fisted palms, sobbing wildly into his chest.

I made to give them privacy when the first slur of words hit me.

"He hates me. He doesn't love me anymore." I stopped for a brief moment.

"I don't know what else to do Keegan." She heaved, sniffling. "We used to be happy together...so so happy together. Why can't he for...forgive me...me?"

He kissed the top of her head, lovingly looking down at his kid sister. He blandished. "Have you thought of....letting go?"

"No!" She yelped. "Never. He's the only one I want. He's the only one for me. Why can't he see that? Can you help me talk to him?"

"Lana...."

"Please, he's your friend. Do this for me brother. Please. I want him back."

Okay, that was it.

I scurried away and into the bathroom, benching on the toilet seat for a moment as my mind replayed everything from the last few seconds. Few minutes later, I got out. She had already fallen asleep and Keegan was carefully laying her head on the pillow so she wouldn't wake.

"She would be fine." I coaxed.

A small smile played on his lips. He nodded. "I know."

"You can leave. I'll take care of her."

"Genny, I don't want to..."

"I will take care of her. You don't worry."

He advanced and braced his hands on my hips. "I know. I wanted to say I don't wanna leave you yet. You're ill."

I placed my hand on his chest, feeling up his heart. It was beating strongly. Beating for me.

"You worry too much."

"About the people I love and care about? Yeah."

I smiled. He leaned down and tenderly moved his lips against mine.

"I love you. You will hit me up in the morning, yeah?

"No problem." I agreed and stood on my tip toes to feel his lips on mine again.

"Damn! I forgot again." He laughed and ambled towards Lana's makeshift dressing table and grabbed a small-sized brown paper and then crossed back and handed it out to me.

"Here." He grinned. "Your doughnuts."

"Thank you." I took them, smiling down at the small pack.

"You welcome. So tomorrow, yeah?"

I nodded, expanding the smile on my face. "Yeah."

***

I shot up from bed and ran to the bathroom. Plopping down beside the toilet seat, I forcefully discharged the contents in my stomach. It was empty to start with. Unable to keep my head away from the toilet seat, I retched, puking so much I was scared my intestines were going to slip through my mouth and into the toilet. My stomach muscles tightened up on the outside while my stomach rolled on the inside. I gagged, gurling and lurching.

Fingertips grazed my face and pushed my hair to the back. I mentally thanked the person helping me out. I felt light headed and woozy.

"Take it easy there."

Lana

"That's so easy to say huh..." I panted. "...since...since you're not on my end."

"That's some shit right there. You okay?"

"I feel like I'm about to die." She aided me on my feet and flushed the toilet.

"Man, you look terrible."

I sighed. "Thanks."

Turning, she peeked above her shoulder. "You're welcome honey." I trudged after her.

She was munching on the doughnuts I left on the dressing table whilst applying some make-up on her face. I didn't have the appetite to eat them the previous night and had kept it in the hopes that my appetite might return the next morning but the smell only made me want to puke some more.

Glancing at me, she offered. "You want some?"

"No thanks." I sank down on my bed, weak and tired. Thankfully, my lecture wasn't until three in the afternoon and the only one.

"They are your favourite, you know?" She sucked her fingers and smacked her lips together. "Mmm, so good. By the way, what was that all about?"

I frowned, "What was what?"

She shot me a look that rather communicated, 'are you stupid?'

"That. One minute you are sleeping and the next, you are baffing your brains into the toilet. You good?"

I yawned and stretched. "Yeah yeah, just really tired."

"Only tired? Girl, you look like you just died and woke up." She shifted her make-up kit to the side and crawled over to me. Her hands reached and grasped my breasts.

"Hey!" I scrambled away, laughing. "Lana!" She silently mosied her way back and sat down and picked up the snacks.

I playfully hid my breasts from her. They had been painfully sore for quite a couple of days. "What was that for?"

"This has being going on for how long?"

I frowned. "A few days...a few weeks actually." She shot me a look and then just like that, all focus and attention were dumped on me and no more shared among her cosmetics and doughnuts.

"When was the last time you met your period?"

I laughed. "You're sounding like my mum."

Her face was stern and serious as she waited for my response with an arched eyebrow. My brows bunched in thought. "I don't know...last three months or so. Why?"

"You're joking right?"

"No. They have always been irregular." Then, it hit me. "Wait, you think I'm pregnant?" I chuckled, grabbing a pillow to throw at her. "No way. I'm not pregnant."

"So you haven't fucked my brother yet?"

"Oh my God! I said I wasn't going to talk about that with you."

"But I'm your friend." She feigned hurt.

I laughed again. "It doesn't work that way." And then I remembered. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm perfect. Why won't I be?"

I scotted closer, "You know? Last night? You were drunk. You said somethings."

She grabbed a red lipstick from her kit and started applying it, "I say a lot of things when I'm drunk girl. Really crappy things. I mean I think we all do."

"Well, I didn't know you once had a boyfriend you loved so much and have been trying to get back." Her Fenty eyeliner froze in the air. I saw her eyes get wide. She stiffened. "Hey!" I slapped her arm. "I don't know anything about your love-life and you know so much about mine. It's not fair!"

At a speedy rate, her hands began scrambling around the sheets, gathering up the heap she made on her bed with her makeup so quick they fell off her grasp more than twice. Her hands trembled as she moved. Eyes casted at all corners of the room, she was vehemently refusing to meet my gaze. She shifted away from me and pushed herself up on her feet.

"Well babe, I'm off to class. It's gonna end in five minutes." Still refusing to look me in the eyes, she threw a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.

I was a bit bewildered by her sudden change in countenance. "Then why not stay?"

"Oh, I'm just tryna be a better person. Kiss kiss." Just like that, she disappeared.

Needing to get rid of the putrid taste in my mouth, I forced myself out of bed and made it into the bathroom when an unpleasant sensation trickled down my spine. I felt cold. Lana's insinuations came back to haunt me. The room spinned in a daze. I couldn't be pregnant, right?

Oh God.

No!

No way. That can't happen. Not now.

Getting knocked up at this point and stage of my life was a major setback. It was strictly against the moral beliefs and religious rules and ethics of my family and church. There would be so much disappointment. My mum would skin me alive after laying me on a cross like our Lord Jesus was and my dad would lose all confidence and faith he has entrusted in me for so long. And the priest back at home? No, I can't let them down in that manner when I had made them so proud of me all my life.

A deep surge of panic punched through my guts. I ran to the bathroom again and ducked my head into the toilet.

***

I was relieved when the lecturer rounded up the class and called it a day. Deeply tired, I pushed my chair back making it creak and stood up. My bottom cheeks hurt due to the long hours I had sat confined to the chair. A two hour class had painfully turned to three and then stretched to four.

"I just want to collapse and sleep for the whole year but not after eating a full fleshed cow."

I inwardly concurred along with Amelia. I was so hungry I could eat a scabby horse.

"Me too. I'm not even gonna lie. That lecturer needs to be sued. Who takes up so much of your time that way? I planned to play the new Xbox series after class." Michael complained.

Amelia slapped the back of his head. "Ow. Why did you do that?"

"For being stupid. We've got an eight pages essay to be submitted tomorrow and all you can think of is getting your hands on Xbox. Should I slap you again? She rose her hand in the air. "Yeah, I probably should." He dodged the hit before it could land on him. I laughed heartedly at their exchange.

I asked, "To the library or the cafeteria?"

"The cafeteria."

"The library."

"I think Amy is right." I glanced at Michael. I chuckled when he glared at me. "You know, cause the library isn't as close as the cafeteria is to our dorms. We could go borrow the books we need for our homeworks, head to the cafeteria, eat and then to our rooms. Isn't it logical that way?"

"I guess so but I'm starving."

"I thought you wanted to play the Xbox."

"Gen, please tell Amy to stay away from me. Would you?"

I laughed at them. "You heard him, Amelia." Wagging my finger in her face with narrowed eyes, whispering. "Stay away."

We got into the cafe an hour later and found a table. The food reached us a while later and I dived in without a second thought. I moaned in food pleasure the moment the burger hit my tongue. It melted into my mouth at an instant. It tasted amazing. The rich, creamy taste of the cheese, the charred, beafy taste of the patty seasoned simply with salt and pepper and something else that just made my tastebuds jump in pure excitement. It was just what I needed at that very moment.

I glanced at my friends. They were staring at me like I had just sprouted another head. Biting largely into my burger, with my mouth full, I asked. "What?"

"You hate cheese." Michael pointed out.

"What? She hates everything about burgers."

I shrugged, taking another large bite that ended up consuming the whole snack. "Well, this one was good." I beamed. "Amazing even." Belching, I rose up. "I think I need another."

"I got the last." Michael said, munching on his.

I gasped.

He shrugged. "And apparently, the next batch would be ready in an hour." I would surely die of hunger if I choose to wait a whole hour to eat. An idea popped into my head. He immediately added. "And I'm not giving you mine."

I huffed in disappointment.

"I'm still hungry." I turned to Amelia.

She shook her head immediately. "No way, girl. Get something else to eat."

"You don't even like cheese." I complained.

She grimaced. "Well Michael here was able to convince me and man, where has these been all my life?"

"There's an eatery a lil' bit farther away from here, on the right. I heard they make really good cheeseburgers if you're hell bent that's what you want."

That was the only food I had perceived and didn't feel the urgent need to puke my guts out in a long time. The smell of fried chicken suddenly drifted into my nostrils. I turned my head hear and there looking for the source. It came from a table surrounded by a bunch of seniors chatting away. My mouth salivated. My stomach grumbled.

I mosied my way through the sea of students and finally reached their table, "Hi" I grinned at them, meeting confused faces in return. "Do you mind?" I asked, pointing at the deliciously looking fried chicken lap resting comfortably and untouched.

The owner glanced at it and at me.

I began to explain, "I just...really want that and it didn't seem like you were you know...interested?"

"Wait, isn't she Scott's girl?"

I replied the blonde-haired guy at my left right away. "Yes, I am." Then turned back to the girl with the fried chicken. "So...you not getting it?"

She shrugged.

I beamed.

I grabbed it quickly and bit into the skin, closing my eyes, moaning instantly at the mild, yet flavoury taste. I couldn't believe I never really had a thing for meat in the first place.

"Thank you." I swallowed and yanked out a chunk. "I swear you just saved a life."

I glanced over at my table, grinning at my friends. Their mouths were hanging low in surprise. I sauntered towards them with the chicken sauce dripping down my mouth and fingers.

I sank down. "Can you believe I've never had fried chicken ever before?" I tipped my head back in laughter, sorry for myself. "What else have I been missing? Tell me."

"Are you crazy?"

I frowned. "What?"

"Why would you do that?"

"Do what?" My face was blank with confusion.

"What do you mean do what?" She adjusted to face Michael. "Is she...is she okay? Like... has a screw gone loose? Gen, are you insane?"

I chuckled at her reaction. "What? What's wrong? The chicken was mmm by the way. So damn good. Lord, I can't believe I said that." I chuckled. "Damn! Damn, damn, damn."

Splitting my sides at the face she pulled across the table, a vast amount of black appeared from the corner of my eyes. And then I heard his name across the cafeteria.

I stilled.

My heart raced. The laughter evaporated instantly.

He turned towards the person who had called him and flung something in the air. The guy caught it and strolled away. He twisted back around and continued forward, tapping on his phone, heading to our table.

I stared at the extremely tall, broad, muscled figure limping his way forward and my mind took a quick detour back to the text messages from last night. He was wounded on his right leg and obviously oblivious to my over-attentive stare memorizing every detail of him for a much later date. My brain was yelling at me to quit staring at him...to just look away but for some reason, I couldn't. I just couldn't my bring myself to obey. To act on it. It was almost instinctive...impulsive...innate...like I was spellbound.

In one quick glance, his eyes locked with mine and clicked on his phone screen, almost immediately. My heart skipped. Then as if his brain had just resumed collecting and registering information once again, from across a crowded room, he glanced up and caught my eyes for the second time and this time, he didn't look away. I saw his lips part only slightly.

When my eyes met his gaze, the room faded away. The noise, the people, all existence, everything that didn't compose of just him and I. Those deep, dark green eyes were hynotizing me and I swear for that brief moment, I could sense the real him, the one without the mask, the one without the attitude, the same one I had met few weeks ago.

Time snapped back into place when someone yanked my arm and pulled me out of my chair, saying something I couldn't quite hear. Dragging me across the cafe and towards the exit doors and just when I was about to slip through, I turned my head back around and pinned them to the point where we lost connection.

A pair of troubled forest green eyes had been trailing me all along.

***

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