To Discover

I sobbed silently on our way back to the car. When El made me sit inside, I couldn't raise my head as I could feel my tears flowing onto my cheeks. "Are you okay?" El patted my back and asked me, which made me feel like crying even more. Whenever people try to comfort me, I always fail to suppress my tears.

"T-They're dead." I sobbed as I looked at El's face. He was surprised. "M-My parents. They're gone." The hope I've been holding onto vanished like a bubble into thin air. When I thought I could finally be with them again, my dream of being with them was instantly crushed. "I-I don't have a place to go back to now." I have nothing.

Due to exhaustion, I felt drowsy, and El supported me by lending me his shoulder as I rested. "It's okay." He whispered while patting my head. No, nothing's okay. El made me feel warmth despite my hurt, and it made me fall asleep. It felt like my world was crumbling into pieces, and I didn't know how to fix it again.

"We've arrived, master." I heard Lorenzo saying that as I felt the car stopping. "Should I carry the lady back to the apartment?" Even though I was awake, I didn't want to open my eyes. It feels like my nightmare won't just stop from that house. It'll keep on chasing me until I'm fully broken by it.

"No, I'll do it. Thank you, Lorenzo." I heard El. "If you'll excuse me." He said as he carried me bridal style. I still have my eyes closed even with El walking back towards his house.

"I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for? I should be the one apologizing."

I opened my eyes after El said that. "Why would you apologize?"

El went silent after I asked him, but he soon opened his mouth. "Because I didn't prevent the situation, you got hurt by it. If I just knew about your situation—"

"It's not something you need to apologize for."

The person who needs to apologize to me right now is no one but Night. It's his fault that I lost my parents, and now I've truly lost everything. "I don't have a place to go back to. My parents a-are gone." That painful feeling in my chest I've been ignoring starts to disturb me again.

I want to cry my eyes out, but no tears will come out, and I'm tired. "Why did this have to happen to me? I-I didn't do anything bad to anyone." The tears I thought won't be coming out rushed out of my eyes.

El helped me sit on the bed where I woke up before. He sat beside me while patting my back. "I'm sorry." His apology makes me cry even more despite not knowing why. Why is he sorry? Is it because I'm too pitiful?

"W-Why does it have to be me?" I sobbed as I looked at El. "I-I… I have nothing else." He pulled me into a hug, making me cry even louder. His warmth and gentle touch made me yearn for my parents even more. It's not his obligation to help me, but he's even comforting me right now.

I don't know how long we stayed like that. El's a stranger, but he's the only one to comfort me with my loss. "You haven't eaten anything since this morning," El said as he let go of me. He has a smile on his face, a warm and gentle smile. "I'll tell the housekeeper to prepare some soup for you. It's cold, and you still have a fever." I looked at him with my swollen eyes and thought he was weird. He doesn't look fazed at all after learning that my parents were murdered.

"What if those people try to hurt you because you're helping me?"

El turned to me before he could get out of the door. "Ellie, please look at me." I stayed looking at my knees because I felt afraid of what he'll say. "I might not know anything about what's going on in your life, but I'm willing to help you."

"Why? You'll get nothing from it." It's not like I can give him anything, I'm penniless, and I'm now an orphan— even though I'm already old enough to live on my own. Tears started to fall again, which made me panic, and I immediately wiped them before El noticed. Is this my birthday gift? To make me suffer?

El knelt before me, making me look him in the eye. It's strange, but looking at his baby blue eyes, I feel a sense of comfort. "I can get to look at a pretty girl like you." He said as he wiped my tears. "Kidding aside, I'm just happy to be able to help a person in need." Is he a saint?

After that, El brought me soup and even fed me because I didn't want to eat. "You can't drink your medicine with an empty stomach." That's what he said, but what's the point? After this, I'm still all alone.

"Tomorrow's my birthday, but I no longer have any reason to celebrate it."

I know that saying that would make things awkward for El, but I couldn't stop. I shouldn't make him feel like that, but all I can think about is the hurt I'm going through. It's selfish of me to do this to him even though he helped me. "Then do you want to celebrate it with me?" Those words made me look at him in disbelief. How come he's handling that so kindly? "Or we can just do whatever you want to do."

I still can't understand. In the back of my head, I still believe that my parents are alive. The news about their death is fake, and they're still elsewhere. That's how El makes me feel; whenever he treats me with that kindness, I feel like there's still hope in me.

"Here, drink this first," El said as he gave me medicine with a glass of water. If this was poison, it would have been better. Even though it's almost useless, I drank the medicine he gave me. I'm not in the position to doubt him after taking me to my former house and comforting me like this.

"You didn't fall in love at first sight with me, right?"

He didn't answer. Instead, he just smiled as he tucked me in. "It's late. You should go to sleep." El patted my head, and after that, I felt drowsy. I know it's kind of rude to ask him if he fell in love with me, but that's the only reason I can think of as to why he's helping me like this.

I don't know why. As soon as I closed my eyes, I felt comfortable. Maybe because I know no one will die even if I go to sleep right now. It's as if I still can't accept reality, that in the back of my mind, I still believe that nothing about this is real.

I didn't notice that I was already drifting away, and the loud sound of the thunder made me wake up in the middle of the night. "What time is it?" It's already dark in the room, and I can only hear the rain outside. I'm thirsty. It's not like I can call for El in the middle of the night for him to get me some water to drink. Although he firmly told me not to walk around because it'll reopen my wound repeatedly. It can't be helped. I'll get it from the kitchen; it will also be the first time for me to look around his house.

I keep dragging my foot on my way out of the room. When I reached the door, I opened it, and darkness greeted me. There isn't any light open, and I can't see anything. How am I going to get some water to drink? Should I just call El's name? But that would be a bother, wouldn't it?

As I walked, not knowing where I was going, I supported myself while holding onto the wall. It'll be bad if I trip and cause a loud sound. I'm unsure if he lives here alone or if his butler Lorenzo lives with him.

As I continued walking, I felt something like a door knob in my hand, and I subconsciously opened it. I should have searched for a light switch, not a doorknob. Even though El did help me big time, I still know nothing about him. What if I discover that El is a psychopath who keeps his victim inside his room, and I will soon be one of them? I didn't think of that… now I'm scared to open this door in this darkness.

I gulped. "Here goes nothing."

I opened the door with my eyes squinting as if getting ready to see a gruesome scene. The lights automatically switched on as I looked inside, but it was different than I expected.

"What in the world?"