Regret

I shouldn't have done this. I think to myself as I follow the thin path along after Jaden disappeared out of my sight down something like a small waterfall where a lot of currents are.

What if he is dead? Maybe I killed him?

Shaking my head for getting rid of the thoughts, I sigh loudly when the path ends at another drop and I have no choice but to jump.

As I take the last step over the edge, my mind goes wild and the upcoming danger comes into my head too late.

Right before I arrive with my stomach first in the water, which turns out to be not as deep as i expected, a bright pain overtakes me and the bubbles from my impact already look kind of magical around me.

Instead of panicking, I begin to realize the beauty of the waters.

It is lovely deep down under the water. Nearly like being in different world. The water seems clear and I can feel my hair floating up the more I float at the same spot for a longer time.

Before I even notice what is going on, a hand is grabbing after my upper arm and my body breaks the surface with a splashy sound in which I gasp after air.

''Are you insane?!'' Avery's voice is audible and I am able to feel the rough ground beneath me when I am getting thrown at it.

''What?''

I honestly don't recognize what was going on with me in the water. It was like I have been captured by the waves and blue water, the mystic deaf surrounding of the liquid which seemed so liberating.

''You could have died!'' He carries on yelling at me while I lean against the wall in my back for regulating my breathing again.

''Okay. Won't happen again. Can we go now?'' I don't even bother to apologize. For what should I even? Not my fault he fell in here.

I know I shouldn't be like this but I can't change it. Life is an ongoing nightmare which we can't escape from, but we can try to stay alive through this living hell.

''Where is Jaden?'' Avery starts walking and I stop in my movement when I remember what I did like flashing lights in front of me.

The fearful look in his eyes as I didn't help him to get out, the moment when he was too long under water and I started to doubt my decision to not help him was wrong and the final seconds where I was close to a breakdown because of what just happened.

Because of what I did.

''I-- I don't know.'' I reply quietly and stand up for following him along another way through a small opening in the rocks.

Looking up to the almost endless tunnel, shivers start to spread over my entire body.

How high is the chance that we get out of here without any mental or physical damage?

''I felt like I was drowning and I think I-- I-- I saw a body.'' Avery stutters helplessly and I have to hold myself up on the stony wall for not falling over as I hear that. ''What if it was--.'' He doesn't finish his sentence but I am able to guess it.

Finnegan.

''No. He isn't dead, right?'' I laugh weakly and insecurely but Avery stays quiet.

This can't be his serious.

''Let's carry on walking. Maybe we see them.'' I suggest and step past Avery, holding back the terrifiying angst inside of me.

Now I pretend to not care again. Pretending is hard but I somehow don't seem to end it. I did that my whole life for being able to avoid the pressuring parts at home and live an acceptable life.

Did it work? Kind of, but lies aren't worth a life. Whatever.

The black hole me and Avery are walking through seems to be endless. There isn't even an end seeable to the slightest.

''Maybe this isn't a good idea.'' Avery mutters and I turn around to face him , but instead of that a really loud rumble is audible and something like a really rough and huge wall suddenly gets out of the ground between us through what I fall to the floor and the panic is immediately haunting me.

''Aidan!'' I can hear Avery scream in panic but it sounds muffled and distant.

Helplessly, I start hamming against the wall without that anything happens or moves at all.

''Av!'' I scream several times until my throat gets even dryer than before and I choke on my own breath.

Within all of this trepidation, dread, terror, horror, agitation, hysteria, consternation, perturbation, dismay, disquiet, apprehension and especially apprehensiveness, I feel like I am losing myself again.

My eyes are wided while my fingernails are scratching along the wall in the hope to find a spot where it could suddenly open with.

With every second I am practically capable to feel the rise of my blood pressure, but I also realize that this is the least of my worries when the wall suddenly starts to move into my direction and I stumble backwards, trying to escape through the back.

Not expecting to be as trapped as I actually am, I yelp when another wall presses me from the back more towards the middle and I realize where I am in.

This is a sad way to end, isn't it?

''This can't be it.'' I mumble to myself in a heated and stressed way, reaching for the top but not feeling anything there.

It is like this place is changing its appearance every two seconds non-stop  and it is  messing with my mind.

The ability to see is also missing through the crippling darkness in here and to be honest, maybe this is deserved.

Maybe I deserve to be crushed by two rock walls and suffer in hell.

''Help!'' I scream again and tears fill my eyes within the next seconds as I strained try to reach the top repeatedly but am failing miserably. ''Please!'' I cry out and hear a cracking noise from what I let out a painful yelp.

''Avery?!'' I scream my lungs out but don't get an answer.

No no no no no! He isn't that! He can't be!

''AVERY!'' I shriek painfully and let myself slide to the ground without any hope left.

I never imagined my life to actually end in this specific way, but maybe I honestly deserve it. I mean what have I ever done good to anyone? God I am still sitting here, waiting for the walls to crush me while only God, Satan, Alaah or whoever knows what is with Avery right now.

An odd feelings climbs up my chest and causes my heart to ach in a very painful and small sobs come out of my mouth when I realize that this isn't some nightmare. 

No talks or anything again. He is dead. Gone. There iss a pile up. There must be. He is hurt. He must be bleeding. He needs me and I am not there. I want to hold his hand. Avery mustn't die alone in the dark between two walls. I need to call someone. Call the police. Call the hospitals. He is hurt. He is bleeding out and no-one knows. My friend. I can't breathe. I can't walk.

Is the light there? Is it you Av? What did we do to end up like this?

I didn't get a chance to tell you everything I wanted.

Why now?

Then as soon as I nearly feel the first wall press onto my left shoulder, bright light is shining over my head like out of some kind of gap where black hair are looking out of.

Is this the death? Am I dead? Is this my road to--

''God stop staring and grab my hand already!'' A female voice appears out of the gap and I finally notice the hand which is getting hold into my direction.

The moment also the second wall is coming so close that I have no other choice but grab after the hand, I gasp after air out of fear and feel another pair arms pulling me up.

As soon as I am out of there, the walls meet with a loud and cracking noise while bright light fills my view and I am finally able to breathe again.

''That's who you meant?'' I turn around and glance at a relatively small girl with shoulder long black hair and an annoyed look in her face.

When my view changes to the person next to her, my heart skips a bit and I slap my hands over my mouth to avoid another sob.

''A-a-a--!'' I let out while sinking to the grassy ground, thinking I really died.

''Yeah. It's me.'' He smirks cheekily and gets down next to me fastly.

''I thought you were dead.'' I sigh shakily and start plucking out some blades of grass in front of me.

''I'm not.''

''I can see that.''

''Great.''