8

I'd had dreams from time to time since I was a young girl of what I could only describe as an angel. Even now, I can remember him with such clarity. He was such a radiant and beautiful being, with hair the color of the sun and vibrant violet eyes. Even when I was beginning my turbulent relationship with Leo Evans, I would occasionally dream of this angel. I guess that one could say that he gave me the strength to face what I had to.

I dreamed of him one more time after making the contract with Jade, though it was nearly two years later. It was a dream much like a sad goodbye.

The dream had been the same for as long as I could remember. It was always in a beautiful field with small flowers blowing in the wind. He was standing there as I turned around, his long hair blowing around him and his form glowing with warm light.

But this time, instead of giving me his gentle smile, there was only sadness marking his face.

"It's you." I heard myself say.

"It's good to see you again Faith, although I wish that it was under better circumstances." the angel responded, his voice soft and soothing.

He moved closer to me, and my left eye became warm. It made me feel very guilty. I had forsaken myself, and he was well aware of it.

"I'm sorry, but I didn't feel like I had any other choice."

"You are not blamed. But you should know that this will not allow you to come into Heaven now. You will forever belong to those whom you entered the contract with, and I am not allowed to do anymore for you."

I began to say something, but he disappeared, and the field turned dark. A sudden, immense cold enveloped me, and the next thing I knew, the ground had opened up and I was falling.

I awoke with a start, doing my best to calm myself. It was only a dream. I was still safe and sound in my home.

I took a few deep breaths to calm myself, then turned to my side and watched as Jade slept. I still couldn't quite believe it, even though it had been almost two years since I had come there. He was real. Saffron was real. They were two demons who had come to me and murdered my husband for me. I knew that the angel in my dream was right. I would never go to Heaven. I was now damned.

Yet I felt no regrets, despite the scariness of that dream. Not when I looked at Jade. He had been right when he'd told me that he was my savior. He had become all of what I ever wanted in this life.

I snuggled against him as I thought of that, feeling a bit more at ease. I was so lost in that comfort that I didn't even realize that he'd woken up.

"Can't sleep?" I heard him whisper.

"No. Too many dreams." I admitted, not bothering to move.

He held me a bit tighter, "You certainly do dream a lot. I've noticed it many nights."

"I supposed that it's just the way that I am. I've always been a dreamer, whether it's been good or bad." I told him. I snuggled more into his embrace, "Jade, am I really such a fool?"

Jade was quiet for a moment. I wondered if he was thinking of a way to add insult to injury with that one. But when he answered, it wasn't what I had been expecting.

"I do not believe that to be the case. I believe that you know full well what you got yourself into and that you are prepared to face what you have to."

"You really think that?"

"You're not a fool Kitten. I can tell you that much, and I would tell you if you were. But the fact stands that you've earned respect and I can live with that much." Jade explained, a coy smile crossing his face in the darkness.

"So you're saying that you actually have come to like me?"

I wasn't really getting my hopes up, but I could always ask.

Jade was contrite, "I never said that I didn't. I certainly wouldn't have chosen you if I wasn't going to like you. You make this life quite interesting, and not only for your troubles or the pleasure I get from your body."

"I'm interesting, you say? I'll take that as a compliment from the all mighty Jade." I teased.

"You get the gist now. But on a serious note, I do find this life quite rewarding. I've found a bit of contentment here and I'm planning on your human life being quite long so that I can enjoy it some more." Jade continued.

That dream went through my head again as he said that. Perhaps he could tell me if it was only a dream or not.

"Hey Jade, do people know who their guardian angels are sometimes?" I had to ask.

I felt him shrug, "Sometimes people have an inkling of them. But I wouldn't know the specifics. I was higher up than that. Although I do believe that Saffron might. He was a lower-level angel when he fell, and probably had experience dealing with those things."

"Sometimes, I would dream about this person. I'd always thought that he was an angel, and I still think that. He was very beautiful, and we always met standing in this field of flowers." I confessed.

"I see." Jade nodded, sounding rather thoughtful, "That sounds about right from what I've heard of them. But I suppose that he's given up now. You won't be joining him after all."

"That's what he said. I was now forever bound to the ones that I entered into the contract with. But even though it made me feel a little sad, I still want to be here with you and Saffron. Even though I've dreamed of that angel for my entire life, I feel like this is where I belong."

"Don't worry too much about it. You're one of us now." Jade assured me.

I snuggled against him, "Thanks Jade. I'm glad to hear that I'll always belong somewhere."

"Of course."

I am sorry to say that I never dreamed of that angel again. Perhaps he really had given up on me, and I suppose that I was one of those that they had to give up on. Because by then I had decided that I no longer needed Heaven. I had my two evil angels and that was enough.