An ordinary boy: Introduction

Hello reader, my life is not exciting, my name is Alex and I am entering higher education this year. A long and umpteenth day has just ended. Lying in the evening on my bed, I think back to my life, my day, my last hours spent and wonder if they were worth living...

I realize that I mainly remember moments with strong negative emotions. Thinking about it, my already unstable mental state begins to shake again, flooded by a wave of coldness and pain, which again fills my mind with an ocean of sadness.

I don't understand, why am I in so much pain when during the day I don't feel anything permanent, just fleeting and passing emotions.

Beneath the criticisms that fuse like bullets, fired by mouths unaware of the impact they will cause, I drown in a mental disorder that cuts me off from the joys of the world.

My gaze then falls on the stars above me, they lead my mind away from here, where the ocean is calm, where the tranquility is never disturbed. I have never felt so good, the water in this ocean is smooth, without overflowing.

Suspended a few centimeters from its surface, I see myself there. A look of sadness, tired of hardships, and where you can see if you look well beyond the outward appearance, a hint of resignation. Beneath the inky black eyes, the seed has already begun to germinate and continues to grow, yearning to grow, the black thoughts whose appearances are becoming more and more numerous.

Tomorrow will be a day like any other, a day when I still and always put on my social mask, a day when I am an actor not in my life but simply in my character. Yet another shadow passes over my gaze which continues to darken. Seeing my reflection, I lose myself, in eyes that seem foreign to me.