1.21

Chu Yan is a paranoid man, even himself was aware of this. What he couldn't get, he would likely destroy it than give it to others. In fact, he was unable to endure the mental pain that he could only relieve himself from this method.

Lian Zhinan won't accept him… he was hated… The scene of Lian Zhinan with other man flashed in his eyes. His heart tightened, and it was difficult for him to breathe this time.

"Chu Yan, what are you doing? Let me go!"

It was too late for him to recover, as his body was already pressing the young man on the bed. Chu Yan could only see red, and the thought of Lian Zhinan leaving him conquered his mind, turning him crazy.

Lian Zhinan… Lian Zhinan… whether it was his body or heart, Chu Yan could not share it with others! Isn't better to just kill him?

The obedient young man in the past flashed in his eyes. Feeling something in his palms, Chu Yan's vision turned clear and what he saw is the pale and almost purple face of Lian Zhinan. His eyes trembled, and he just noticed that he was choking the young man into his death.

He let go, and he immediately stumbled down on the floor. On the other side, Lian Zhinan coughed violently and inhaled so much air to compromise the lack of oxygen in his body.

His coughing was severe, and he almost fainted from the lack of air. He coldly looked at the man who was frozen on the floor. The marks on his neck looks scary, the thin white clothes on his body made him more slender.

Chu Yan's hands were shaking. His mind was clouded by anger and anxious, desperation and sadness. He lifted his eyes and his throat tightened. Facing the young man's calm gaze, Chu Yan felt a sharp pain in his chest.

He… He almost kills the young man. Had he gone crazy?

"Xiao Lian…"

"Chu Yan." The young man cut him off. His eyes were unusually calm, and there is an endless tranquility inside those pupils. Lian Zhinan does not want to hear whatever reason Chu Yan would offer. He just wants nothing to do with him. "I hope you won't appear in my sight again. If you really consider yourself as a human being, let me go."

Chu Yan turned completely silent. His ideas and methods were instantly pushed deep into his mind. He couldn't accept the fact that the young man was no longer attach to him. He destroyed him. But it was still hard for him to let go.

"X-Xiao Lian, I know you hate me, but I can't do this. Letting you go will surely kill me."

It was insane. He couldn't believe he would actually beg for someone like this. Chu Yan was used of others imploring for his attention.

Lian Zhinan smiled mockingly, speaking sharp edges words that keep piercing into his heart, "Then I might as well die at this point."

"X-Xiao Lian…"

"Chu Yan, don't you get it? I want nothing to with you and no matter what you do it was still worthless. Seeing you make me sick and having to do something with you make me want to kill myself." Lian Zhinan closed his eyes, breathing heavily. "Your betrayal, lies and suffocating restriction would drive me to death. Do you really wanted me to die that bad?"

"N-No! Xiao Lian, don't say that, please…"

Each words, each sentence were like swords cutting through into his chest. Chu Yan was helpless. He wanted to deny the young man's accusations, but he found no reason to. The young man wanted freedom.

Chu Yan closed his eyes, his body remained on the ground. He found no strength to stand up and embraced the young man, coaxing and pampering him like he usually does. His eyes blurred, and it was too late for him to stifled his tears.

His innocent Xiao Lian… was no longer his Xiao Lian.

He swallowed his inner pain with difficulty, and replied the words that were like him accepting his death, "O-okay Xiao Lian. I won't appear in front of you from now on. You won't see me starting tomorrow."

Lian Zhinan coldly shifted his eyes and covered his body with blanket. He no longer trusts everyone around him, his trust was entirely broken.

Chu Yan stood up with all his remaining strength and stared at the figure in the bed. He smiled sadly and left with unsteady steps.

For the first time, Chu Yan prove his words. He did not appear in front of Lian Zhinan again, and it was just his assistant who delivered foods and other stuff. During this period of recuperation, Yan Shen visited a few times, still convincing him to enter the showbiz.

Lian Zhinan finds it funny. He was an introvert and had social fear, entering the entertainment industry was like entering hell for him. But perhaps, the protagonist's words had a strong halo that Lian Zhinan unknowingly considered it.

He wanted to pay the debt he had with Chu Yan, completely cutting him off out of his life. If he wanted that, he needed money. Staring at his appearance in the mirror, Lian Zhinan softly smile.

"Really? You wanted to become an actor?" Yan Shen was dumbfounded.

In fact, he does not really intend to bring the young man into the entertainment world. That world is messy and chaotic, full of black materials and unspoken rules. Yan Shen does not want Lian Zhinan to be tainted by these things. The young man is like a serene moon, there are definitely countless bad wolves who will covet his whole being.

"I needed some money." Lian Zhinan replied plainly.

Yan Shen cheekily suggested, "If you want money, I can give it to you. You don't have to work."

Suddenly, coldness flashed in Lian Zhinan's eyes. This is like an infinite void. He wants to avoid relying on others anymore, he wanted to rely on himself. Besides, he grew up owing others.

"I don't need your money." Lian Zhinan calmly narrowed his eyes.

Yan Shen felt cold for a brief moment. He looked at the figure in the bed more deeply and seriously. The young man is innocent, naive, but there is an unexplainable coldness crawling in his inside. That once provoke, it would surely explode in an instant.

"O-okay. My agency is good, I will refer you to the president."

Lian Zhinan nodded. Yan Shen explained everything to him, and he listened attentively.