I want to be together with you

Recently, I had started using makeup. Only a little, though. I wanted to look cuter, but I didn't want to look like I was wearing makeup. That would ruin my image, right? I am a casual beauty.

"Wow! Big sis, are you putting on makeup?" My little sister burst into my room, with her mouth wide open. "First you started wearing a skirt and now this? It's like you are turning into a girl."

"I am a girl." I shouted, pointing my makeup brush at her. "Get out, or I'll mess up your face."

"Real," She carried on walking towards me. "You are terrible at this, let me help you out. You are doing this to impress a boy, right~"

"What! Stop talking rubbish-" My voice went so high that it squeaked. I shut my mouth for to calm down, but my little sister was already on me by then. "No, stop."

"Hold still, or you will make it worse."

With that, I had no choice but to wait for her to finish. I told her that if she messed up, I would definitely draw on her face with permanent marker.

After a few moments, she was done, and she finally let me see myself in the mirror.

"So, what do you think?"

I didn't know how to respond. The person I saw in my reflection looked so different for a moment I couldn't believe it was me. How could some small amount of powder make me look this good.

"T-this is too much." If someone saw me like this, then they would know that I was wearing makeup. "Could you… could you make it so that people can't tell…"

"Oh~ Sure, that's easy, I'll teach you."

In a few minutes, I had my old face back again. There were some slight differences because of eye shadow and mascara, and some light foundation that made the marks on my face hard to see. My little sister also made time to talk about skin care. It started to look like she was never going to stop.

"Hurry up, I'll be late for school."

* * *

On the first day of high school, I saw Terrance for the first time since the end of summer. Looking out toward the sea, serious and his thoughts somewhere far way from me. It seemed like in the same way that I had come to accept my feelings about him that long summer. He had decided on something as well.

"You know, I asked my mum where my dad is." Terrance had said to me once where we were in middle school.

"And?"

He pointed out into the sea. "She did this."

"So, he's out travelling?"

"No, she says he's dead the bottom of the sea."

After that, he had started crying. Before Terrance and I really got to know each other, we all thought that he had as many emotions as a rock. I had seen him be bullied in Elementary school, and I had even bullied him for a short time in middle school, though that's maybe a story for another time. But in all that time he had never once cried. Not from the insult of having yogurt poured over his head, or the pain of a thumb-tack in his back.

But then something happened to make our relationship change. And he showed me everything that he could never show anyone else. And, of course, sometimes it was too much for me. And so, I started to act cold towards him. And this dynamic sort of stuck.

On that first day, he said to me. "I don't want to live in this town any more. I want to go somewhere else."

And I had just replied. "Do whatever you want. I'm not going to stop you."

When really, in my heart, I wanted to say. "What about me?"

* * *

Since I was late for school, I ran out of the house still biting on to the toast I was having for breakfast. I expected that Terrance had already gone to school since I was so late, but he was still waiting on the bridge as I wheezed up to him. Terrance rushed to hold me up while I tried to catch my breath.

"Why are you still here?" I said, between deep breaths. "Class starts in ten minutes."

"We can still make it." Terrance said.

Speak for yourself, I thought, forget running I don't think I can move any more. "Just leave me here."

Terrance looked me in the eyes with a determination that I didn't really understand. Recently, he had been studying so much that he didn't have much time for me. Maybe because of that, I had been trying harder and harder to get his attention. But now that he was looking straight at me, I just wanted to disappear. My face felt so hot. I thought that I was going to melt into his hands.

"I won't go without you."

Suddenly, he scooped me up into a princess carry and began to run toward the school. My heart began to beat so loudly, it sounded like the beat of an anthem above the wind rushing past us. As he ran, Terrance was smiling. Smiling for me because he never smiled for anybody else. For him, I wasn't a burden like I am for everyone else. He was happy to clean me, to hold me, to stay by my side and support me. Terrance, please don't ever forget those words you gave me.