How Am I Still Alive?
Spiritual Qi Resurgence, Gods descending?
Continuous disasters, all living beings suffering?
What does it have to do with me? I'm just a patient with an incurable disease, who's been given up on treatment and has a countdown to death.
Embarking on the path of exorcising demons and annihilating immortals with my crippled body is not for the sake of protecting my family and country, but because the hazardous duty pay is too tempting, especially the compensation...
"This Evil Gods profession system is cursed, even if there's smooth progress in the early stages, the practitioners will eventually commit suicide..."
"Give me a set."
"This Demon Sword poisons its user and has already taken ninety-nine lives..."
"Give me two, and also that man-eating demonic helmet, soul-devouring blood claws, get me a set."
"This Magic Potion is harmful to heaven and earth..."
"Enough talk, I'll take them all!"
However, the problem is, why am I still alive after taking on all these high-risk missions, stepping on every risk, and doing every deadly task?
【Congratulations, congratulations! Ranked first among the Top Ten Heroes Who Moved the World...】
"...Heavens, wasn't the average life expectancy in this line of work three and a half years? I've been here for one cycle of three years after another, I'm almost an S-level hunter, the first of the top ten heroes! Why am I still alive? I just want to make an honor sacrifice, scam some compensation! Is that so hard?!"
Persimmon Whale · ACG
Racist old woman: I'm gonna say the N Word! Private: That's racist! You can't say the N Word! Skipper: Mrs. Obama, I've done it. I've stopped racism! Mrs. Obama: Thank you Skipper. Now I am free to roam this Earth. Trump: Not if I have anything to say about it. And I do! I'm gonna say the N Word! Skipper: MRS OBAMA GET DOWN Trump: Niggaaa Skipper: Mrs. Obama, where are you? Are you okay? Trump: She is no longer with us, Skipper. And with her death, I am finally free to say the N Word whenever I want. Martin Luther King Jr.: Not if I have anything to say about it, Trump! And, I do! Prepare for my Civil Rights Beam! Trump: AAAAAAUG Trump: Skipper, my son, you wouldn't let me die, would you? Skipper: Shut up, cracker Trump: AAAAAAUG Skipper: Hey Kowalski, who's that guy in front of us rising out of the water? False Obama: It is I, Barack Obama! Kowalski: Mr. Obama, what are you doing here? False Obama: I have come to exact revenge on you penguins for allowing my wife to die at the hands of Donald Trump. Skipper: But Mr. Obama, we did everything we could! False Obama: I've already made up my mind. Skipper: Mr. Obama, don't do it! This won't bring Michelle back! False Obama: Niggaaa Penguins: AAAAAAUG Skipper: Skipper's Log, #32. Barack Obama has struck us out of the sky by saying the N Word. Kowalski: It just doesn't make sense, Skipper! Obama would never say the N Word! Skipper: I don't understand it either Kowalski. But some things you just gotta live with. Unless... Donald Trump! I shoulda known it was you! False Obama(Trump): Skipper, my son, I see you've discovered my master plan. Now that I've taken over Obama's body, I have full reign to say the N Word whenever and however I please. Skipper: So what you're saying is you're inside of another man? False Obama(Trump): Why, yes, I suppose you could say that. Skipper: But Mr. Trump, wouldn't that make you GAY? False Obama(Trump): No.. this can't be! Trump: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Skipper: Well boys, we did it. Racism is no more. Mr. Obama: Hello, Skipper. Skipper: Mr. Obama? What are you doing here? Mr. Obama: I came to thank you for your great service to this country. Skipper: No thanks necessary, Mr. Obama. Mr. Obama: As a token of my gratitude, I'd like to give you the N Word Pass. Skipper: Mr. Obama, it is an honor to call you my nigga. Mr. Obama: And as to you, old friend