The bright moon, the cool breeze, the drunken fireflies
This person had a slender figure and a handsome face. His eyes were extremely heroic, and his white clothes and hair were unforgettable.
He was Baili Chongyuan's eldest son, Baili Liuying's senior brother, Baili Haoqing.
The eldest disciple of Jinyun Mountain, a rare talent that the sect had high hopes for.
"Ying 'er, are you feeling unwell? Tell daddy."
Baili Chongyuan was a little worried as he looked at his daughter.
This daughter of his, no matter how bad she was, was still the flesh and blood of his heart. He could not lose her.
"Father…"
Baili Liuying's mind was in a mess as she cried out in a daze. This cry made Baili Chongyuan extremely happy.
"Ying 'er, look at your mother!"
Xiao Ruoyi came forward with tears streaming down her face, but after waiting for a while, Baili Liuying still did not speak. Instead, she heard her mumble,
"Who…are you…"
This sentence shocked everyone present, including Baili Haoqing, who had been calm all this while.
Did this devil incarnate sister of his lose her memory?
The soul of a newbie from the modern era had transmigrated. He didn't know martial arts, so he had his senior brother to take care of him. He would collapse in one cup, and his senior brother would take care of him. However, on the night of their wedding night, would his senior brother also come?
Chaxiang chicken
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Sudah bagus, seperti penggunaan majas alegori "memohon melalui tatapan matanya", saranku lebih diperbanyak penggunaan majas alegori, agar menarik dimana membuat imajinasi pembaca menjadi lebih aktif, kayak seolah olah pembaca menyelam dalam membayangkan bola mata orang asia yang berwarna kecoklatan atau hitam dengan permukaan kasar didataran yang tidak rata di atas bumi. Kemudian diselipkan majas metonimia seperti "Kediaman mewah leo", itu sudah bagus dalam penempatannya sebagai bumbu bumbu dalam novel. Tapi hati-hati dalam jumlah menggunakan majas hiperbola seperti "Metatapku tajam, membuatku ingin memekik karena tatapannya terlalu menusuk jantungku", jika terlalu banyak di suatu chapter atau berturut-turut di suatu paragraf, maka akan membuat pudarnya makna keseriusan dari suatu chapter diparagraf-paragraf tertentu, seakan-akan terlupakan tindakan-tindakan keseriusan tokoh-tokoh pada waktu tertentu dan yang paling parah akibatnya menjadi terlalu lebay😄. Dalam chapter ini sudah pas jumlah majas hiperbolanya, bagus. Terakhir saran dari aku, munculkan tokoh yang bisa menyeimbangkan kedudukan dan kekuatan leo, kemudian buat konflik dimana clarisa bisa saja sangat mudah untuk didapatkan oleh tokoh tadi, akibatnya leo akan takut kehilangan clarisa tentu itu akan sangat romantis, dan juga dapat memunculkan sampai mana perjuangan leo untuk mempertahankan clarissa, ini saranku sih, tapi pasti akan dikembangkan? Ya. Hahaha terlalu banyak kayaknya saran bukan ahli😄. Pertanyaan terakhir, tau siapa pemilik akun Yoi-kun?😆