webnovel
DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv117yr
2017-11-01 09:17

I would first like to write that for some reason some words in this review keep getting censored for no reason even though most of them are not even bad words... Regardless, try your best to fill the gaps when necessary. This novel isn't bad so far and for fans of this kind of genre i would recommend it but i cannot see where the 5/5 stars are coming from, especially since many of the reviews i have seen hadn't even reached over chapter 100 before reviewing. I will go over some of the key reasons for my overall score of about 3.5, which i think is very fair for this novel at the moment. Translation quality. The translation is littered with small mistakes and grammatical errors, which although alone do not make any significant difference, pile up overtime to make it into a bit of a problem. The reason it’s a problem is that small misunderstandings can cause bigger problems in a mystery style story, which this one seems to have turned into after the first beginner dungeon. Each dungeon (a bit of a stretch to call them dungeons) at this point are 'solve a mystery in a certain time' missions and therefore to follow along with the mystery an excellent translation is essential so that you get all the details. Another problem is that i think some of the words aren't translated exactly to their correct meaning or at least some of the meaning from the original Chinese is missing. Now, i am unable to read Chinese and cannot confirm this so i may be wrong and it could just be bad writing, but either way it would lower my score. An example of this happening would be during chapter 71: Venture In, where the MC enters his first team dungeon. He reads the background which says "Alcatraz Prison has been experiencing some mysterious incidents lately. Your special expert team has been hired to solve the mysteries". And from this he says, "Terms like "mysteries" and "special expert" made Kieran think of paranormal activity or something along that line" and then goes onto state how it must be ghosts that cannot be killed by regular means before even getting to the island. How does this make sense? Since when has special expert or mysteries instantly meant that it must be ghosts or paranormal? Of course, he ends up being correct (because the writer obviously already knows what he will make happen) but him ****** random claims like that is either bad writing, the MC is retarded, or some meaning has been lost. At least in English mystery certainly does not mean it must be a ghost, which means that the translation is missing some information somewhere or the writer is just bad. Which could be either as i will explain. Story development. The story develops in a way that might trick you into thinking that it and the MC are smart, but neither actually are. Why? Because for it to be smart stuff actually has to make sense with clues given to the reader, things that can actually be picked up on if you're careful. If **** pops up out of nowhere, that isn't a twist or an amazing reveal in a mystery... it’s just bad writing and feels cheap as ****. And this happens in all 3 of the 'solve this mystery dungeons' (the animal one isn't as bad). Example of this poor writing. During the MC's second dungeon where the MAIN MISSION is to find a girl, he only finds her by coincidence at the end whilst completing a side mission. Now, maybe i just missed some masterfully hidden secrets and we should have known she would be with the gangster dude hiding in a coffin underground, but to me it just seems like a bull**** way to wrap up the mission because he felt like it was about time to end that arc. Just randomly bringing in characters out of nowhere isn't a twist, it's cheap. Another thing in the same mission is that the Duke dude is introduced literally right at the end... Who thought that's a clever idea? Introduce a brand-new character out of nowhere at the end. Again, not an enjoying mystery to read if it is literally impossible to try and figure out who the bad guy is. If **** just pops out of nowhere then what’s the point of following along? I thought the writer would trick us by ****** it a character that has already been established and has been trying to trick the MC, like Carl. Such as he was manipulating from behind the scenes, acting the fool but in reality, was in control. A kind of the mantis stalks the cicada, unaware of the oriole behind sort of twist. After-all, i thought to myself, he won't just add a new character in out of nowhere at the end of the mission, will he? But then this Duke dude shows up with some of his goons and a captured police chief. Sure you sort of knew there was an army dude but him just showing up isn’t interesting at all. The story after the first dungeon turns into a solve this mystery game written by a guy who can't write a very good and compelling mystery story. You can put that down to lack of experience, poor translation or limited time due to it being set in a ‘dungeon’ but whatever the reason the mystery aspect doesn’t feel very fleshed out which is important for it to be enjoyable. Now about the MC not actually being smart. Perhaps that is unfair because he can say some reasonable stuff, especially near the beginning imo. But, some other stuff just doesn’t make sense and is similar to how he jumped to conclusions about ghosts and such mentioned previously (assuming that the meaning was translated correctly). He goes to Nobian’s place after killing him and sees a blackboard with 5 names on it with 4 of them crossed out, his name is also on the list but hasn’t been crossed out. Lawless comes and says that he knows the guy called Gibbon, saying he was strong. All that they know is that Nobian must have worked together with someone because even in ambush he couldn’t have taken Gibbon alone. They also say, for some reason, that “He seemed to be quite familiar with my information, something a man alone could not have achieved.” Which doesn’t make much sense. Why could a man alone not find out his information? It doesn’t seem difficult to ask around, purchase the information or simply watch the MC himself. But that’s fine because we have already established that he has accomplices anyway. So what information do we have. We know he has accomplices and killed four other players… Then the MC jumps to the conclusion “There must be a killer organization founded by a couple of players, an organization unknown to the public”. How does he conclude that with the information he was just given? It even states that Nobian might have been a psychopath, so he might have just been doing it for the sake of it. Or he and some people he knows might just PK together for extra loot, after all it was known that the MC was loaded, and so must Gibbon have been if he was a veteran. It doesn’t seem to make much logical sense to instantly say with so much certainty that it just must be some sort of secret underground killer organisation. Perhaps the translation has something to do with it, but I think it’s more likely that the writer doesn’t really know how to make a character solve mysteries and seem smart, so he just basically gives them the ability to see into the future instead. It would have made much more sense if the MC said that It MIGHT be an underground organisation instead of instantly being certain of it as if he already knew the answer when he couldn’t have. There are other examples of this too where the MC, with very little or no evidence, will say **** that doesn’t make much logical sense with the information given, but still ends up being correct because the writer obviously wants him to be. Another problem is the dumping of weapon stats when the MC doesn’t even use the weapon. It feels like a waste of time and seems to be there for no reason. It adds nothing to the story at all. I think it would be much better to only give detailed item breakdowns for stuff the MC will use or important items and enemies. Also, I don’t know if this is an issue with character design or story development, I think a bit of both, but the MC’s motivation and pressure of curing his illness is solved a bit too quickly imo. After his second dungeon you can already see how much money he can potentially make so any and all pressure about trying to save cash to cure himself is down the drain. It removes a certain amount of pressure for me because at this point he is ****** so much from a single ‘dungeon’ that he can pretty much cure himself easily. The beginning dungeon in this regard was my favourite because he was still weak, had to strategize more and the pressure of his illness was still looming over him. Another problem I have is that by ****** the ‘dungeon’ areas into these mysteries it handicaps character development in a sense. This is because mysteries are made good by interesting characters, thought provoking goings on and clues that you can follow along with the character. But by ****** dungeon missions into mysteries instead of what traditional dungeons are like it means that new characters must be made each time, ****** it hard to become interested in these characters, because you know they will be gone by the end of the story. This in turn makes me even less engaged in the mystery mission and is also part of way I liked the starting dungeon a bit more than the other dungeons. Trying to write an intriguing mystery is very difficult in the kind of style and format the writer is using. This is also why the fights are much more intriguing to read and is why I wish we would put some more focus on those instead. I also would have liked some more variety in the main missions given. More solve this mystery started to get tedious. I could go on and on about more issues I have but by then I will probably end up with 3-4 thousand words, so I will stop here with the criticism. Now you might be thinking that I must fucking hate this novel… but I don’t hate it, as can be seen from by score. I think a 3/5 is more than fair because despite all of the issues I could name if I wanted to the premise is still somewhat interesting and this story does appeal to a certain niche of reader. It isn’t terrible but is by no means revolutionary. I would say give it a read because if you can ignore some of the holes in the translation and story it can be enjoyable at parts.

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Replies36
DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

For some reason it keeps censoring the word m a k i n g

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SilverThiec
SilverThiecLv4

haven't read a word you wrote

DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

then why have you bothered commenting?

SilverThiec:haven't read a word you wrote
ParkBung
ParkBungLv5

Love the truth. Love intelligent reader

EtherealMight
EtherealMightLv6

Tnx for the critics I think it will help a lot for the author!

Piknos
PiknosLv5

Wow how the hell....your reply is marked as being before his comment....what magic is this?

DodgeChance:then why have you bothered commenting?
nnjnn
nnjnnLv5

Well, and I was wondering if translation quality/writing gets better, just after finishing beginners dungeon...

Piknos:Wow how the hell....your reply is marked as being before his comment....what magic is this?
Kobalt
KobaltLv11

Great review... thx

Ugachaka
UgachakaLv5

That's the problem with this type of literature, the readers are wildly unobjective and have really low standards so almost all light novels, no matter how bad overall they are, have ratings of almost five stars.

DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

I agree. Looking back on this review and novel currently, I would say I was a bit too generous in my end rating of 3.5 overall. If I were writing today I probably would have given it 2.5. The reason that I still gave it a 3.5 here was that I was trying to take into consideration the type of reader and place the end score in the context of the other novels on this site. If you get what I mean.

Ugachaka:That's the problem with this type of literature, the readers are wildly unobjective and have really low standards so almost all light novels, no matter how bad overall they are, have ratings of almost five stars.
Ugachaka
UgachakaLv5

I am currently in the mood for novels, do you have anything to recommend? I would like the typical guy gets powers type of novel but without an eternal virgin mc, completely wildely overpowered mc and so on. You know, just something decent and readable.

DodgeChance:I agree. Looking back on this review and novel currently, I would say I was a bit too generous in my end rating of 3.5 overall. If I were writing today I probably would have given it 2.5. The reason that I still gave it a 3.5 here was that I was trying to take into consideration the type of reader and place the end score in the context of the other novels on this site. If you get what I mean.
DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

All of the translations on this site, and on most sites similar to this one, are free yet have much better translations. So the arguement that it is free and therefore you cannot expect good translation quality is silly. These people do make money. Whether it is via ads, patreons, or the new spirit stone system etc. As for your second point. I'm not even sure what you're trying to say here. Your point seems to be that that translating accurately and correctly would somehow necessitate a large increase in word count to better explain things which could be done using much fewer words in the original chinese. I disagree with that, because it has been done fine and without issues in all other novels with good translations that i have no issue with. I don't think asking for words in English to make sense in context to be a big ask, especially when all it would take is changing one or two words, or a sentence or two, which is a very easy thing to do. This is even more important for this style of novel, as i explained in my review.

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reonstep
reonstepLv5

Holy **** u write so much nonsense . Just write your review not the whole fucking story rewritten in it.

DodgeChance:All of the translations on this site, and on most sites similar to this one, are free yet have much better translations. So the arguement that it is free and therefore you cannot expect good translation quality is silly. These people do make money. Whether it is via ads, patreons, or the new spirit stone system etc. As for your second point. I'm not even sure what you're trying to say here. Your point seems to be that that translating accurately and correctly would somehow necessitate a large increase in word count to better explain things which could be done using much fewer words in the original chinese. I disagree with that, because it has been done fine and without issues in all other novels with good translations that i have no issue with. I don't think asking for words in English to make sense in context to be a big ask, especially when all it would take is changing one or two words, or a sentence or two, which is a very easy thing to do. This is even more important for this style of novel, as i explained in my review.
DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

None of what i wrote is nonsense it is clearly evidenced. Just because you're a fucking brainlet and can't read any actual sized reveiws doesn't mean i am in anyway in the wrong. If you don't like the reveiw, and don't have anything constructive, why bother even commenting?

reonstep:Holy **** u write so much nonsense . Just write your review not the whole fucking story rewritten in it.
reonstep
reonstepLv5

I like annoying retards like you. Bite me

DodgeChance:None of what i wrote is nonsense it is clearly evidenced. Just because you're a fucking brainlet and can't read any actual sized reveiws doesn't mean i am in anyway in the wrong. If you don't like the reveiw, and don't have anything constructive, why bother even commenting?
DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

"Annyoing retareds" You literally instigated this entire conversation LMAO

reonstep:I like annoying retards like you. Bite me
brichorn
brichornLv5

your analysis are spot on,but i believe in a constructive criticism that will be helpful either to the author or translator,that i believe is why the comment section is open.if this story is as sh*ty as you say it is,then more than 86% of the stories on this site need to be removed. please be a little considerate of other peoples work

DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

I'm not quite sure what you mean. How is my criticism in anyway not constructive? And, honestly, i do think a significant portion on this site are bad. I don't think they should necessarily be removed because they are bad, but they're extremely bad nonetheless. The volume of stories causes quality control to go out the window on a large portion of the stories on this site. And, just because it is somebodies work isn't really a reason to not criticise something when it is bad. All things that have ever been created are the work of somebody. If that was reason enough to lessen critique, then nothing would get seriously criticised.

brichorn:your analysis are spot on,but i believe in a constructive criticism that will be helpful either to the author or translator,that i believe is why the comment section is open.if this story is as sh*ty as you say it is,then more than 86% of the stories on this site need to be removed. please be a little considerate of other peoples work
brichorn
brichornLv5

i'd like a recommendation of stories that you believe deserve above 4.0 rating,...A good writer can get better despite criticism but what do you say about someone who took writing these stories on a whim,you either keep him out or help him get better. extremely harsh criticism will probably lead to despair leading to even worse writing,which will probably irritate you more than before

DodgeChance:I'm not quite sure what you mean. How is my criticism in anyway not constructive? And, honestly, i do think a significant portion on this site are bad. I don't think they should necessarily be removed because they are bad, but they're extremely bad nonetheless. The volume of stories causes quality control to go out the window on a large portion of the stories on this site. And, just because it is somebodies work isn't really a reason to not criticise something when it is bad. All things that have ever been created are the work of somebody. If that was reason enough to lessen critique, then nothing would get seriously criticised.
DodgeChance
DodgeChanceLv11

I don't think it is my job to coddle the authour. It is to give an accurate review and point out flaws in the novel. I think it is a massive issue on this site as a whole where people are extremely lenient in their ratings; most novels on this site are given 4+ scores which is absolutely baffling. My review was in no way extremely harsh, it is just that most other people on this site hardly give any criticism at all. If this review was on any other site it would be seen as a normal review, but because this site has such low standards it makes any critique stand out. And which stories i believe should be given a 4 rating? Well, it has to have good English to start and its translated words should actually make sense in the context of the story. If the story cannot even meet that standard then it can in no way be considered a 4. If a story can be given a 4 despite the fact that it has grammatical errors in almost every chapter and has large translation innaccurcies then what is the point of even giving reviews in the first place? Might-as-well just give everything a 4 (which is what seems to be happening on this site).

brichorn:i'd like a recommendation of stories that you believe deserve above 4.0 rating,...A good writer can get better despite criticism but what do you say about someone who took writing these stories on a whim,you either keep him out or help him get better. extremely harsh criticism will probably lead to despair leading to even worse writing,which will probably irritate you more than before
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