I found the beginning to be far better than the middle and end, and the story truly falls apart at the end of Act 1, or the twist. The writing wasn’t bad, especially in the beginning, but typos do litter it. What really put me off were the love interests; they felt forced and moved too fast. I also despise multiple love interests—it annoys me, so this part is personal. The world-building, or lack thereof, leaves something to be desired. You created churches and gods, so develop them early on and form your world around them. For example, make all the nobles clergy members who rule over the church and its land, like the Catholics did in England before the 7th century. Add orders to all of them and make the religion the focal point, because that’s the center of your power system. Instead of mana, make it divinity. Characters could grow stronger based on how closely they follow the church’s tenets—the more in line they are, the stronger they become.
Now, for the academy’s world-building, it’s lackluster, and I couldn’t tell you how to navigate it. There are very few named buildings, and the buildings that are named are poorly constructed. The combat also leaves some parts to be desired, but it’s fine for the most part. Character descriptions are pretty solid. The plot moves fast—sometimes too fast—but I did enjoy it for a while and saw a lot of potential. However, much of it was wasted due to inexperience and rushed sections.
That said, the author will most likely create great novels in the future because, for the most part, their weaknesses are basic issues that will improve with more writing. I believe good things will come from this author, and I hope they continue.
P.S. Sorry for the typos and missed words. I’m rushing this, and I type slower than I think.
